You have an ad blocker! We understand, but...

PoetrySoup is a small privately owned website. Our means of support comes from advertising revenue. We want to keep PoetrySoup alive, make it better, and keep it free. Please support us by disabling your ad blocker on PoetrySoup. See how to enable ads while keeping your ad blocker active. Also, did you know you can become a PoetrySoup Lifetime Premium Member and block ads forever...while getting many more great features. Take a look! Thank you!
Get Your Premium Membership


Poetry Forum

home recent topics recent posts search faq

Forum Home » High Critique » In The Dark Ghost Room

For poets who want unrestricted constructive criticism. This is NOT a vanity workshop. If you do not want your poem seriously critiqued, do not post here. Constructive criticism only. PLEASE Only Post One Poem a Day!!!
10/22/2011 5:17:06 AM

Timothy Abegunde
Posts: 2
I think I feel a breeze

A breeze and a touch of horror

Something makes my breath seize

The stings of inner torture




The beast of the dark just passes

I hear the pings of its awfulness

Horrible snuffs complementing terrible masses

Something grip me here – oh fearfulness!




Now what – silence…

The quietness of the graveyard

I sense trouble in disguise

Only that worse turns bad




Oh wait, I can see

Slow approaches of eye balls

The burning eyes of the black beast

Monster, you, coming for me or my pulse




This is it my adventure fiasco

In the ever-dark ghost room

I would rather die like a hero

Behind this locked door with my rheum




As I’ll lay my back on this door

Oh beast feast, on me feast

I can hear quacks as I fall

…the door open at least




Massacre! Oh massacre of the beast

Sun ray-the enemy of the dark monster

Came in for its burnt feast

Because the door opened
permalink • reply with quote

Forum Home » High Critique » In The Dark Ghost Room






Powered by AspNetForum 6.6.0.0 © 2006-2010 Jitbit Software