Poetry Forum
Post here if you're new to receiving a critique and you want "gentle" feedback on your poem. Constructive criticism only. PLEASE Only Post One Poem a Day!!!
10/7/2011 6:44:03 PM
Denise Gold
Posts: 1
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Laying next to each other
and kissing in the rain.
Holding hands side by side,
easing any pain.
Talking endlessly
of things that don't make any since.
Talking and laughing,
and hardly feeling tense.
Hugging and holding
for forever it seems.
Laying next to one another,
just speaking of our dreams.
Making stupid jokes
just to see each other's smile.
Feeling so close
but most times there are miles
separating us
and keeping us from touching
but we deal with it
because at least we have something.
Yeah, we have something
I'm just afraid to call it love.
I don't want to go to fast,
and I don't want to mess this up.
But I like you a lot.
Love? Yeah, I just might.
And what I love about this
is when we kiss it feels right.
I'm really glad I found you,
and that I gave us a chance.
I guess you're the Romeo
to my love story romance.
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10/22/2011 5:15:54 AM
Keith Baker
Posts: 18
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I think you should throw a refrain in the mix and turn this into a country song.
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11/16/2011 6:29:54 PM
mike williams
Posts: 5
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very lovely
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12/13/2011 7:23:37 AM
sarah smith
Posts: 2
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My love sets sail upon waves of trust.
Destined for your heart.
My love takes flight upon breezes of honesty.
Destined for your soul.
My love walks a path of sincerity.
Destined for your mind.
My love climbs a mountain of togetherness.
Destined for your life. 
www.heypoetry.com
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12/16/2011 4:09:53 PM
Janet Setters
Posts: 4
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Denise,
This is a lovely poem! You do need to correct the word since to sense. It is a poem from your heart which is something very hard to share with others and especially with the one you feel this way about.
Never fear speaking from your heart because that is wheretruth lives.
Good luck,
Janet
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