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Forum Home » High Critique » The test (Please critique)

For poets who want unrestricted constructive criticism. This is NOT a vanity workshop. If you do not want your poem seriously critiqued, do not post here. Constructive criticism only. PLEASE Only Post One Poem a Day!!!
10/19/2018 6:20:43 AM

Wendy Nipas
Posts: 38
The test
In these days of gender turmoil
Gender issues, gender strife
It has now become a puzzle
How to go about with life
What to teach our growing children?
Who or what defines their role?
When the family is in shambles
Undermining every goal
It’s confusion upon confusion
Rules and morals what are they?
What was once highly regarded
Is quickly seen as ’in the way’
Change the system, change foundations
Make things easy, cut the chains
That restrict the craving human
Never mind the stains and pains
We decide what we’re becoming
Can’t you see? And it goes well
If you doubt what you are seeing
Then don’t ask and we won’t tell
The time has come to make things over
The more the better, let’s recreate
And we will not stop to ponder
If this is prompted by self-hate
Let us live out every feeling
How we think is how we feel
And this unrestricted living
Really does have strong appeal
As the genders keep confusing
One another and the rest
Whether agreed on or objected
This puts all mankind to the test.
Wendy Nipas
edited by wendyme on 10/19/2018
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12/2/2018 2:53:07 AM

Jack Webster
Posts: 255
Do you have any favorite confessional poets?
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12/4/2018 10:32:21 AM

Wendy Nipas
Posts: 38
Hi Jack,
To answer your question, uh, confessional poets? I may sound a bit ignorant, but I don't really know any confessional poets. I guess I should? I'm so new at this. Will you recommend some?Why the question if I may ask? And thanks for replying.

superlativedeleted wrote:
Do you have any favorite confessional poets?
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12/13/2018 1:01:18 PM

Charles Henderson
Posts: 7
Wendy: Just have to give you an A on this one dear. You kept your pace, form, conviction and content all the way through a long formidable subject. Good write. Charles Henderson
edited by Charles on 12/13/2018

--
Chaz
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12/15/2018 7:19:58 PM

Wendy Nipas
Posts: 38
Thank you Charles, very kind of you.


Charles wrote:
Wendy: Just have to give you an A on this one dear. You kept your pace, form, conviction and content all the way through a long formidable subject. Good write. Charles Henderson
edited by Charles on 12/13/2018
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1/4/2019 12:08:56 PM

Luisa Herrmann
Posts: 2
This is a very beautiful poem, but it would be perfect if just a little shorter. You have a beautiful message, but it gets a little muddled in all the words. Sometimes, less is more!
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1/8/2019 7:24:34 AM

Wendy Nipas
Posts: 38
Thank you Luisa. I'll take your words to heart.

ThatDramaKid wrote:
This is a very beautiful poem, but it would be perfect if just a little shorter. You have a beautiful message, but it gets a little muddled in all the words. Sometimes, less is more!

edited by wendyme on 1/8/2019
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