Poetry Forum

Forum Home » High Critique » Looking for High Critique on Hallelujah Gusts~

For poets who want unrestricted constructive criticism. This is NOT a vanity workshop. If you do not want your poem seriously critiqued, do not post here. Constructive criticism only. PLEASE Only Post One Poem a Day!!!

10/26/2017 9:26:02 AM

Donna Roberts
Posts: 2

Here I stand with outstretched hand Waiting for your next command Etched a drawing in the sand " Hallelujah" the King is GrandConsidered being in a bandWhere I could praise you from the standMy fathers gift was not in voiceMy offering is in lyric choice " Hallelujah" your names rejoicedOn those days when my eyes are moistYou recognize before its voicedAsking you, send your healing cloakPeople need your protective yoke"Hallelujah" My lyric spokeWhere I am perched looks like the beastIs enjoying a ravenous feastSometimes clad in Stephen Paddock attireStealing dreams from the young and inspiredMoney trails of the unscrupulousBreadcrumbs leading to nothing but mistrustLean on the one who breathed life into dustI am breathing "Hallelujah" GustsWhen this world brings you to overwhelmRemember whose seated at the helmIf your feeling a heavy despairHe fights for you in a higher realmCall on him, for he is waiting there I'm inhaling "Hallelujah" repairTurn off the news, put on hiking shoesHard to decipher whose who from the cluesEnough to give anyone the bluesGive the Lord his morning and evening dueHallelujah Savior is redemptive glueHe knows your not perfect and still loves you tooThat was the mission for his son to do"Hallelujah" Salvation is true

• permalink • reply with quote