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11/4/2017 7:47:36 AM Ronald A. Williams Posts: 1	Well done, Romance poem. I find no fault. Ronald A. Williams
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11/10/2017 5:45:05 PM Henrique Oliveira Posts: 1	I really like the rhythm of the poem - it makes the verses very enjoyable to read, as they flow along quite nicely. I also believe you have something meaningful to say, i.e., that the object changes the subject through contemplation (my take). You present the reasons why throughout the poem with competent metaphors and similes, and are able to finish strong ("I am never the same" - six syllables, two anapests). At the very end, you kind of rhymed flame/same. Doing so contributed to the strong finish I mentioned above, as it added a little punch to "same"; but it also seemed, to me at least, a bit gratuitous. I mention this because I have long struggled, in my own writing, with these isolated, often involuntary, rhymes. In the case of your poem, this one rhyme left me wondering if you did so just to finish on a "high note", that is, you didn't go through the discipline of rhyming throughout the poem, but chose to do so at the end in order to "finish strong". In future writing, perhaps you might consider, in addition to free verse, a structured form, that is, with formal rhymes, structure, etc. I say this because I believe you produced a very competent piece of poetry and would be up to the challenge of writing in a more disciplined manner, something I believe would enhance the effect you sought to achieve with this particular poem. All in all, bravo!
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11/14/2017 7:49:54 AM Correagndslkhsj Loaifhshfasjkh Posts: 11	Great poem! I agree with Henrique, and all in all, this is a GREAT poem! I suck at poetry so I won't post my poems on this forum. :I -- -Sincerely, the Truth
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11/21/2017 12:15:26 PM Stephen Wilson-Floyd Posts: 49	This is a love poem. Love poems, in my opinion, are extremely hard to write. I try to write something never said before. Or if said before, to say it in a different way. Everything that could possibly be said about love has been written to death. Maybe, I'm just old and like the man who wanted to close the patent office after the ultimate invention was invented, the crossbow. Try to surprise the reader. One way is to infuse the poem with conflict: the good and bad about the love interest. I like the butterfly on the nose. Best wishes!
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