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8/2/2017 1:20:32 PM Anastasia Stewart Posts: 12	Oh sweet silence. Settles upon all, until the last stir is still. But calm waters do more than just soothe. Reflect the thoughts of the tight lipped minds, what lies beneath isn’t always so kind. A contrast to chaos, where voices are let free. Madness runs wild, so loud the ground shakes beneath. The secrets Silence keeps, fills the holders eyes with vengeful clouds, casting shadows on their conscience. The chaos, the crazy, it’s out in the open, hear the screams echo, the commotion spread, disrupt the quiet. Disturb the peace. Chaos is not synonymous for bad. Nor is silence for good. Calm surface with cold blooded veins; distressed facade but anger set free. Chaos so sweet and silence so bitter, maybe all is not quite as it seems. edited by anainabox on 8/29/2017
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8/23/2017 11:11:08 AM Dean Wood Posts: 31	A thought-provoking message in this poem! Well thought out and presented well. I am not accomplished in the free verse form that you have chosen here to I will withhold criticism. That said, your last line (sentence) feels forced and out of place. It is a clever rhyme but the whole poem is emphasizing bitter and sweet when at the last moment, you throw "sour" at me. Rhyme is not forbidden in free form but this just feels like it is shoe-horned in. I recommend saving that nice rhyme for another piece of work and ending this one differently. Good luck with this poem!
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8/29/2017 3:06:31 PM Anastasia Stewart Posts: 12	Dean Wood wrote: A thought-provoking message in this poem! Well thought out and presented well. I am not accomplished in the free verse form that you have chosen here to I will withhold criticism. That said, your last line (sentence) feels forced and out of place. It is a clever rhyme but the whole poem is emphasizing bitter and sweet when at the last moment, you throw "sour" at me. Rhyme is not forbidden in free form but this just feels like it is shoe-horned in. I recommend saving that nice rhyme for another piece of work and ending this one differently. Good luck with this poem! Thank you so much, I never noticed how forced the last line felt, but I did decide to change it!
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