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Forum Home » Be Gentle » Blades dance.

Post here if you're new to receiving a critique and you want "gentle" feedback on your poem. Constructive criticism only. PLEASE Only Post One Poem a Day!!!
3/21/2011 4:11:23 PM

Lucas Williams
Posts: 10
A maiden glimmering in an aura of justified bereavement. Shadows lurking amidst the epitome of existence, a crystalline signet. Is this a search for dreams or death? This eternally overt void leaves traces, a scar left unseen. Blades dance in a plethora of pain that envelops cognizance as sanity applauds
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3/22/2011 2:41:59 PM

Manouchka doreus
Posts: 23
i love your venacular... simply wonderful
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3/25/2011 2:08:41 AM

Lucas Williams
Posts: 10
Thanks alot! i feel i need it to justify the message and just love using it
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3/25/2011 7:40:03 AM

Manouchka doreus
Posts: 23
be careful when your using it though... in this piece it added just the right amount of mystique to the message but in other pieces that have a less fairytale sort of approach it could overcrowd the message, i'm going to check ou the rest of your poems... maybe you could give me a little feedback on mine?
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