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For poets who want unrestricted constructive criticism. This is NOT a vanity workshop. If you do not want your poem seriously critiqued, do not post here. Constructive criticism only. PLEASE Only Post One Poem a Day!!!
2/3/2015 7:01:15 AM
Bob Atkinson Posts: 294
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Goodbye to All
(a goodbye poem to Rod McKuen)
- by Bob Atkinson
goodbye to all who now remain
I've done a race which gave me pain
also, with some pure delight
it gave me gladness to die tonight
goodbye to those who could not come
will meet you someday on the run
from things you did there in the past
yes, you forever grabbed my ash
goodbye those who took the wine
and kissed all goodness there aside
bringing into focus all your vibes
of correctness in your stride
you kicked the can aside
goodbye to lovers of the past
gave to you my foolish pouts
didn't mean I locked you out
my role was that of circus clown
goodbye to relatives of which was many
didn't ever ask a penny
you didn't give me much of time
didn't mix your lives with mine
goodbye to dreams of future grace
wasn't in my mournful race
I tried to do things that would last
but fell face flat there on the track
goodbye to those I never knew
perhaps they'll read my death review
yes, treat me kind in words of praise
though never read good words on page
goodbye to you who read my lips
lips still, not moving in love's quips
I never said much anyway
so you didn't notice I'm deranged
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3/19/2015 10:19:54 AM
Bob Atkinson Posts: 294
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A tribute to Paul Simon's "Homeward Bound"
Home in a Dark Box
- by Bob Atkinson
overarching adventure
grabbed me by an ear
dragging me 'cross a new world
from home to staggered fears
not fears of dissolution
as a being here on earth
merely reduced my shadow to
some small patch of footprint's dirt
made me one of many
who set out to survive
absorbing trust of community
an idea for which we strive
found myself not with good skills
in some situations prearranged
following footsteps of men adept
got lost in life's shell game
endowed with luck of fortune
needed to persevere
or, if you will, continue life
for another year
worked well for me, though always
saw success beyond my grasp
did as well as could have done
based on skills learned in years past
through a time of detachment
fighting hard to make the grade
found survival's cost excessive
in grabbing onto victory's parade
settled then with open arms
a miracle made of stages
thought things could substitute
for my need to propagate creation
traded sense of order
for that time of sad reflection
until my open ended dreams
came back to full fruition
sense of duty well defined
create something that might last
no matter if found useful
do as others did in years past
and now, to that real question
does life penetrate this facade?
or will my time of luxury
end in my grave's dark box?
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7/17/2015 12:28:57 PM
Bob Atkinson Posts: 294
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Pins and Needles
- by Bob Atkinson
prior to this opening
I feel so well aware
of distant pulsations
devoid of titled flair
I see in moving backwards
moving forward in the mix
revising preconditions
devoted to my list
of things to do this morning
attention thereby given to a score
which tallies undulating motions
shooting through an open door
on pins and needles I await
some feelings in cool darkness
without which cannot be described
tangible emotional progress
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