Poetry Forum
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Is It Good?
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11/8/2012 9:17:30 AM
Thomas Gieseler
Posts: 3
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His eyes can not register the disbelief, that his defenses were not at all a defense. The equation was too complex, nor could his brain fathom how stratigically his opponent manipulated him. He believed his plan to be flawless, every piece placed with intention to ensure his enemy could not advance. There had been no sign of threat, constructed no weakness, ignored the pawn as he began his brutal attack. Swiftly he dispersed his knights, galiently defending his honor, the two working as one. He attacked the outside with his bishops, eliminating the possibility of escape if his victom decided to run. He slaughtered his prey with no remorse, destroying any threat or position of power, be ruined by haste. Greedily his rook captured the queen, raping the last piece of defense, no only one move away from....
checkmate! His king fell and his eyes can register the disbelief, that his defenses were not at all a
defense. Answering the riddle that confused him simply, " the plan he believed he designed, I had
designed for him". Every piece he believed he captured was purposely sacrifieced to produce the
illusion as real. What he thought to be only a game, was in truth my creation of a very lucid and deadlybattlefield. Move by move he obliged my creation, knowing as you you would, accepting every oppertunity given to destroy everyone. And as his king falls, true and loyal stands the assasion, and he realizes his army was no match against a forgotten pawn
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11/8/2012 9:23:30 AM
Thomas Gieseler
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Please take the time to tell me what you think
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12/21/2012 12:09:03 PM
Caitlin Dwinnell
Posts: 4
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I honestly got chills. The words were very precise and just beautiful. It told a very unique and interesting story, which was very complex but still simplistic. I really enjoyed it. The ending was my favorite part. Especially the last phrase when you talk about the pawn. Thank you for sharing this poetry.
edited by passionscript on 12/21/2012
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