Power to try

Alcohol does not make you happy. It is a depressant by nature, and a good one at that. Sure, you'll be high for a moment, but you forget. Wake up feeling sick and full of regret. It turns me into a different person, one not so tame with my actions. One who does stupid things. So here I am again, another try at sobriety. With no friends or family to help me cage this demon, just words on a page. I won't whine though. And hopefully, I won't touch that wine. What now though I wonder? I don't want to be that boring guy at the party, but i don't want to die now either. At first i was married to Mary Jane. Than it was whiskey. Its funny how life goes isn't it. We run around all day, trying to collect magic paper that you think will give us freedom in some sort of a way, knowing though, that we all die one day. Me, I just want to have something to say. Something that helps people in a way. That's where true value is. I thought alcohol was like a steroid for an artist, but really it's our downfall. Will I stay clean now? I don't know. But I'll try... another attempt is worth a shot. Another attempt to be happy is worth trying for. They say the devil prouls around for people like me, so I can't stumble anymore. Will I have another Autumn fall? Maybe... but will poetry I have found some sort of power. Power through the pain. Power to try again