Get Your Premium Membership

Frankly funny story... - Painted Hunter's Blog

About Painted Hunter
(Show Details...)
Bloggers Photo

Frankly funny story...

Blog Posted:1/10/2014 2:13:00 PM
  Ok, like Cyndi said, we are missing Frank's humor right now so here's a goofy little story for you. Not clever, or all that funny really...but if you'd seen it, you'd have never forgotten.
  So most of you have read stories of mine involving my brother, Micah, and I (usually hunting), but I have a younger brother also. His name is Jordan. We share ten acres, on which we raise animals.(It's not a business, but we do sell the pigs we don't need...and by need, I mean the ones we don't use for meat or breeding) As of now we have over 120 chickens, 10 ducks, 3 turkeys, 6 or 7 geese, 2 goats, 9 pigs, and one old, cranky mule named Lester. No, we don't need a mule. We just took him a year ago from someone who was giving him away ... now I see why they didn't want him. He's a real jerk. Anyway, last April, Lester knocked down the fence to the pen where we keep Hairy Larry, a 400 lb boar we use to breed our sows, Wilma and Sugar-Butt (don't ask). I received a call at 3:10 pm that day from the sheriff department informing me that Hairy Larry was raising hell at the school crossing. I'm not kidding, people. We're that country. Being a small town, the cops knew exactly who's pig he was and since our ten acres is only 3 miles outside of town, Hairy Larry had no trouble getting there. I was at work so I called Jordan and he met me there with our pig trailer. Lucky for us, Wilma and Sugar-Butt, had stayed put. Lester, who had escaped his own enclosure before loosing Hairy Larry, showed back up late that evening. I was hoping he wouldn't come back. Anyway, we were met at the school crossing with angry cops, gawking pedestrians, and high school kids snapping off pictures with i-phones. Hairy Larry had decided to plant his 400 lb butt right in the middle of main street, and nobody would come near him. In truth, he was scared and surrounded by people. He didn't know what to do so he just stayed put. Normally, he would load right into the trailer for us, but not this day. We couldn't even lure him in with sour corn. So, in the end, I did the only thing I could to get him in the trailer....I sang to him. Hairy Larry will follow me anywhere when I sing, because I sing when I feed him...probably not because I have the voice of an angel...haha, though, I can carry a tune. Was I embarrased? Yes. Were crowds of high school kids giggling and gawkers gawking? Yes. Did Hairy Larry load his fat butt into the trailer? Why, yes, he surely did. 

Please Login to post a comment
Date: 1/11/2014 1:42:00 AM
Very funny..I'm reading and imaging all this in my mind : )
Login to Reply
Hunter Avatar
Painted Hunter
Date: 1/11/2014 2:26:00 PM
it was quite an afternoon...;)
Date: 1/10/2014 8:30:00 PM
Good one!
Login to Reply
Hunter Avatar
Painted Hunter
Date: 1/11/2014 2:26:00 PM
thanks Roy
Date: 1/10/2014 8:26:00 PM
You made me smile...............SKAT
Login to Reply
Hunter Avatar
Painted Hunter
Date: 1/11/2014 2:25:00 PM
Thanks Skat. glad to make ya smile!
Date: 1/10/2014 7:25:00 PM
What a wonderful story! I have stories from my families chicken farm! LOL
Login to Reply
Hunter Avatar
Painted Hunter
Date: 1/11/2014 2:25:00 PM
gotta love those chickens, huh?!
Date: 1/10/2014 5:52:00 PM
a fantastic personal story, Caleb. You are one crazy and unique guy, just like our Frank!!
Login to Reply
Hunter Avatar
Painted Hunter
Date: 1/11/2014 2:24:00 PM gotta entertain yourself out in the boonies!
Date: 1/10/2014 5:05:00 PM
ha, Caleb, you are one of a kind.... Keeping the love, and spreading the joy... Luv~ Linda
Login to Reply
Hunter Avatar
Painted Hunter
Date: 1/11/2014 2:21:00 PM
Thanks're great...:)
Date: 1/10/2014 4:53:00 PM
Login to Reply
Hunter Avatar
Painted Hunter
Date: 1/11/2014 2:20:00 PM
You too, Anne!
Date: 1/10/2014 2:31:00 PM
just goes to show you have a hypnotic voice, caleb... a fun blog for the weekend with hopes that frank is reading this,, huggs
Login to Reply
Hunter Avatar
Painted Hunter
Date: 1/11/2014 2:17:00 PM
hmmm...maybe I do..ha
Date: 1/10/2014 2:18:00 PM
OMG... Priceless! Love the names of your animals and your errant mule Lester. Frankly Frank will love this too! You need to write more stories LOL
Login to Reply
Hunter Avatar
Painted Hunter
Date: 1/11/2014 2:16:00 PM
Thanks Karen..:)

My Past Blog Posts

Inappropriate church behavior ... a funny story or two
Date Posted: 5/28/2014 8:46:00 AM
Wassup y'all?
Date Posted: 4/15/2014 10:11:00 AM
Pictures. Me at 5 and others
Date Posted: 3/17/2014 11:32:00 AM
Fishin' contest closed, fishin' haibun, and nonsense as usual
Date Posted: 3/10/2014 10:57:00 AM
21 Cyclists, two hillbillies, and a deer on an ear...
Date Posted: 2/27/2014 2:05:00 PM
Gone Fishin' Contest
Date Posted: 2/19/2014 8:36:00 AM
Donkey Basketball
Date Posted: 2/18/2014 10:05:00 AM
Into The Wild ... And Back Again
Date Posted: 2/10/2014 11:09:00 AM
In honor of the crown
Date Posted: 2/7/2014 12:09:00 PM
Re-telling of the naked hunter...and other stories
Date Posted: 1/26/2014 3:36:00 PM
Honoring Levon Helm... Singer, Songwriter, Legend among the greatest
Date Posted: 1/20/2014 2:32:00 PM
Where do you find peace?
Date Posted: 1/13/2014 11:22:00 AM
Frankly funny story...
Date Posted: 1/10/2014 2:13:00 PM
The Guest
Date Posted: 1/2/2014 12:46:00 PM
Southern Expressions....??
Date Posted: 11/4/2013 2:17:00 PM
Contest prize photos up
Date Posted: 10/1/2013 11:43:00 AM
Contest Judged ... Finally
Date Posted: 9/30/2013 11:26:00 AM
New Contest Posted--In the Woods
Date Posted: 9/2/2013 8:46:00 AM
Poetry and Fishing
Date Posted: 6/25/2013 10:24:00 AM
No idea what I'm doing...
Date Posted: 6/17/2013 10:59:00 AM

My Recent Poems

Date PostedPoemTitleFormCategories
4/23/2015 Heaven Waiting Rhymedad,daughter,death,
4/22/2015 It Wasn't That Great Light Versefunny,
4/21/2015 Thoughts on Self Employment Light Versehumorous,
4/21/2015 Recent Random Events Light Versefamily,funny,

My Photos

Fav Poems

glad you're gone Haikunature,people,
Thunder Rhymechildhood,nature,
Effervescent Eyes Verseimagination,
skeletal trees Haikunature,
WHEN SUNSET BLEEDS Quintain (English)hope,nature,
The Bluest Sky Rhymefaith,forgiveness,
ACHES OF A BOW Lyricmusic,nostalgia,
Cinder Girl Rhyme 
Summer's Interlude Free verse 
Petals in the Wind Quatrainnature,
Baby Brave Quatrainfear,life,war,
Caleb I do not know?family,
Take the ribbon from my hair Light Versedad,love,autumn,
By All of This - Ah, Wanton Bliss Quatrainromance,me,valentines day
Timeless Love Rhymefamily,life,love,marriage
Virginia Free versebeautiful,old,summer,old,
Summer Butterflies Tankahappiness,
Fireflies Haibunlove,nature,me,light,ligh
Goodbye, My Child Rhymeadventure,allegory,angel,
FORGOTTEN TREASURE- The Rebirth Light Versebeauty,deep,growing up,in
HANDS THAT DIPPED ME Free versefathers day,inspiration,m
I Burn Rhymelove,sorrow,
A Bed of Pink Petals Sonnetspring,tree,
- Show Me Your Face - Versecaregiving,love,me,
Imagine Free verseearth,imagination,
The Well Rhymeallegory,water,water,
Sweet Dreams Quintain (English)adventure,fantasy,prayer,
Nana's Garden Haibunchildhood,family,house,ga
Violet, My Adored Free versecolor,universe,,western,
The Locket Free versememory,
Welcome to the Funny Farm I do not know?animal,fun,funny,me,
Facebook Haibunlife,
Five Stars Quatraindedication,poems,
Haiku 40 till Haiku 47 beneath the sakura tree Haikuspring
Battling Addiction Shapecourage,me,me,
Eleventh, March Free versededication,hope,tribute,u
Nothing Remains Free verseintrospection,life,me,hea
A FORMal Evening Light Versefun,
Five Great Limerick Guys Limerickdedication,humorous,
No Answers Free versefriend,
Elvira And The Pillow Free versehumorous,life,car,
To a Weeping Willow Free verseearth,grief,tree,
Backward Acrosticlife,
Darkest of Times Free versedark,
Feline Alert Free verseadventure,beauty,body,mir
Golfers Beware Limericksports,
The Return Free versechildhood,
Those Old Cold Men of the Woods Dodoitsume,nature,
- Alcoholic - The lion roars Verselife,sad,
Unborn Tomorrows Free verseinspirational,,western,
Where The Wind Blows Coupletnature,wind,,Lullaby,
under the sakura tree Haikunature,
Where The Sycamore Grew Narrativeautumn,family,house,life,
When the Flowers of Youth Fell Free verseseasons,time,war,
Feathers Questionkunature,
I am a Child- Poem written for Restore a Child Organization Enclosed Rhymechild,love,rights,
Night Driving Free versecity,
Portrait of a Life Sonnetlove,
Uncle Jim Free verselost love,me,nostalgia,se
Between Two Shades Of Night Free versecaregiving,dedication,
A Stone in the Cold part 6 - runner up Sonnetadventure,
Love Beyond the Pale Quatrainabuse,devotion,lost love,
The Darkness at Noon Rondeaudark,
Goodbye Than-Bauknature,
Raindrop Butterflies Haibunnew year,
Cradle My Tears, Moon Free verseloss,moon,,Lullaby,
To Elizabeth Narrativechildhood,dedication,girl
Am I Turning into a Lizard Serial Killer Narrativeangst,animal,how i feel,s
In Strangler's Wood Rhymedeath,
An ABC Love Song Pastoraldevotion,love,
The Philosopher Rhymemetaphor,
Why I Weep Italian Sonnetnatureme,
Just a note-Humbleness is a virtue Rhymecaregiving,
Between the Lines of Poetry Soup Coupletjealousy,passion,poetry,
To Feel Rondeauemotions,
I Remember When Rhymememory,people,violence,
Return to Wagon Wheel Sonnetloss,

Fav Poets

Andrea Dietrich United States Flag United States Read
David Williams United Kingdom Flag United Kingdom Read
Debbie Guzzi United States Flag United States Read
nette onclaud Philippines Flag Philippines Read
Mandy Tams The Golden Girl United Kingdom Flag United Kingdom Read
Carolyn Devonshire United States Flag United States Read
Laura Breidenthal United States Flag United States Read
Heather Ober Canada Flag Canada Read
Landyn Currin United States Flag United States Read
Jack Jordan United States Flag United States Read
Richard Lamoureux Canada Flag Canada Read
amanda smith United States Flag United States Read
Charmaine Chircop Malta Flag Malta Read
Eileen Manassian _Not Listed Flag _Not Listed Read
Hidden Sister United States Flag United States Read
Jack Ellison Canada Flag Canada Read
Maurice Rigoler United States Flag United States Read
Sunshine Smile Norway Flag Norway Read
kabuteng P.iNk k. Philippines Flag Philippines Read
Donna Jones United States Flag United States Read
Carrie Richards United States Flag United States Read
Timothy Hicks United States Flag United States Read
Poet Destroyer A United States Flag United States Read
SKAT A United States Flag United States Read
Cyndi MacMillan Canada Flag Canada Read