The Internal Struggle
The internal struggle
There's a monster at my door
And I should not let him in,
He's come and gone a thousand times
And now he's back again.
I do not have the wherewithal
To play with him today,
I wish it were more easy
To make him go away
I feel my strength is fading
I don't know where it goes,
Since this is so personal
You'd think that I would know
The knocking is getting louder
As I'm sucked into the flame,
And tomorrow I'll have no one
But me, myself to blame
As I prepare to greet my demon
Excitement fills my mind,
As I try to reassure myself
That this is the last time
In the back of my mind I know that isnt true
I've been here too many times before,
As timidly but happily
I open up the door
All at once My mind is numb
I no longer feel pain or fear,
The cloudy memories have vanished
Everything seems so clear
Tomorrow may be different
But I'm invincible today,
And then I let my monster know
That it's time he goes away
The cycle will begin again
When I've awoken filled with shame
The monster came and made me
Play his stupid little game
One day I'll win this battle
One day I'll be so brave,
If I continue losing
I'll soon be in my grave
By Jodee Morin
Dec. 10, 2019
Copyright © Jodee Morin | Year Posted 2019
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