When He Didn'T Return
You wake up put your uniform on and eat the breakfast I have made for you
You kiss the kids good-bye and I jet for the door to say I love you too
The day has just begun and there is so much I need to do
How to fit everything into one single day I haven’t got a clue
Dosing in and out of sleep the ringing is faint within my ear
I wasn’t ready for what it was I was just about to hear
What fire? The roof did what? Is he okay?
Suddenly that day turned into what I would remember to be the darkest day
My heart pounds faster making it harder to breathe over and over I pray
I call my mother to watch the kids and I can barely get out what I have to say
How could this normal day turn into the worst I’d ever see?
I clinch my eyes tightly together, how could this happen to me?
Driving as fast as I can the tears filling up my eyes
The radio is off and all that fills the air are my loud worried sighs
The hallways seem so dull, long and a very pale white
My eyes are burning from tears and the flickering florescent light
A group of men in uniforms fill the hallway I have ended in
I try hard to fight this sick feeling I know I’m not going to win
The loud voices, the explanations, the tears from everyone around
My eyes move from person to person but I can’t hear a single sound
I walk into room 214 and see you lying in front of me
The only things I can focus on are all the burns I see
Please don’t leave me all alone I need you so much now
I should have been with you every minute everyday would allow
I will never forget this day for as long as I shall live, for now I am alone
I pick up your jacket and run my fingers over the patches that I have sewn
Your helmet has been given to me and I’ll keep it with me forever
You told me once don’t forget and I whisper in your ear, “Forget you? Never”
Time has passed so quickly it’ll be three years this May
I wish you could see our son who’s looking more like you everyday
When I ask him what his dream is he says to fight fires like his dad
It's been hard getting through each day but I know you’d tell me not to be sad
I wanted the chance to kiss you more and hug you as long as I could
Sometimes this world is so hard there is so much I wish I understood
Alone I lay in bed and the only sounds I hear are the whisperings of the fan
Selfishly I want you back but God must have needed a fine fire fightin’ man
Copyright © Kaci Stoddard | Year Posted 2007
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