Bittersweet
Bittersweet memories,
Bring you back to me,
In vain,
I've tried to hate you,
God himself knows,
How many nights I've prayed,
How many tears I've cried,
But alas,
They hold no volume,
To whom they are directed to.
Questions rattle around,
In this thing called,
A mind,
And all of them lead,
Right back to you,
The lies,
The pain and violence,
But also the times,
That you made me laugh,
Instead of cry,
When you held me close,
Instead of the usual strike.
When you held me,
I felt like I could fly,
Nothing was around us,
Except you,
Your presence,
And your warmth,
That seemed,
To set my blood aflame.
Looking back,
I was a naive girl,
Who fell in love,
And she was used,
For everything that she wasn't ready for.
If you loved me,
Why'd you leave me here,
Left with the bruises,
The ongoing memories,
And the torture,
of watching you live,
A brand new life with the woman,
You swore would never replace me.
But alas,
That was another lie,
That has tore my heart,
Beating from my chest,
As if,
Someone has squeezed the blood,
And love from it,
And toosed it aside.
But sometimes,
In my moments of clarity,
I thank you for the pain,
And the reoccuring onslaught of memories,
For if you didn't show me,
What real love is not,
I would not have found a love,
That once again,
Sets not only my blood,
But my whole being on fire.
So thank you darling,
For showing me,
What love is not.
Copyright © Sara Wiggins | Year Posted 2019
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