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Cmack Estevez Poem
I hate Ni**as
When I’m looking and staring at this burden world in my vision and I see the world collapsing especially in the poverty streets all I see is ignorance and stupidity. I see a disgrace , I see ni**as ni**as that can’t live up to their higher expectations. Whatever happen to the blacks and browns ? Whatever happen to our role models ? Ni**as these days need to step up and be a man being a gangbanger a pimp and a drug dealer isn’t no excuse that is just being ignorant and just can’t handle your business as a man . The differences between a ni**a a black man and a brown man is a black man and a brown man is well educated and is always providing for his family and stick with his job and career to pay for his living. Ni**as are just plain lazy some even claim they bout it when they had everything good and blissful in their childhood. Ni**as always think in their thick minding skulls that life is so easy and hopeless that they don’t have to put in work well in the troublesome streets. Whatever happen to our sisters respecting themselves ? Why all a sudden they have to be such hoodrats and allow these ni**as to disrespect ya’ll like some damn dogs have some sense ya’ll beautiful and strong please don’t be bitches and sluts. What happen to our blacks and browns ? Whatever happen to our ni**as speaking and spitting that deep lyrical meaning in the music ? WE created and built this rap and hip hop and now we destroying it and poisoning it.
We have a choice to not be a ni**a in this society.
We have a choice to be a somebody in this society .
Put down the guns.
Stop disrespecting and fighting the cops by calling them pigs.
To get respect you must quit being ni**as and hoodrats.
How can someone respect you when you act like ya’ll not well educated ?
I feel so disgrace to be brown because the world of my kind ashames me. Ni**as are so hypocritical when a white person uses the word ni**a and they have the audacity to get mad and beat they asses when ya’ll ni**as uses the word a lot until we stop abusing it then any race have the right to use it. It’s never too late to have a dream of something. Do it for your kids Do it for your family and most of all do it for yourself. Ya’ll are not ni**as deep down ya’ll just want to act like it. The word doesn’t owe you jack. The world wants yall to put in work and stop being sorry for yourself because being sorry for yourselves won’t allow you to grow just be mad at reality forever. I will not go down with ni**as that ain’t good. I will not join ni**as in some hoods. Until they do the right thing and become blacks and browns then I be all right but until then I hate ignorant ni**as . Be a man of your word and your society.
I hate ni**as that can’t provide.
I hate ni**as that can’t choose a better life.
I hate ni**as that disrespect our Sisters.
I hate ni**as that can’t accept their morals.
I hate ni**as that kill.
I hate ni**as that can’t pay a bill.
I hate ni**as that gang bang.
I hate ni**as that be pimping women .
Live up to the high expectations don’t let the streets make you and own you allow yourself to better yourself and avoid these no good streets.
Copyright © Cmack Estevez | Year Posted 2016
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Cmack Estevez Poem
Trinity Garden Bloods 4ever
Poem by Cmack Estevez
I grew with friends from Elementary
I grew with bloods in Middle School that I knew in 2nd grade.
But I never screw up in the poverty North Eastside streets of Screwtown.
Jasper Aaron Banks was my homeboy for life from sixth to eight grade he kept me away from the gang stuff.
He knew I had potential in something unique and special so he wanted me to focus on my writing while he gang bangs.
He told me there’s more in life than being all hard and banging.
He was my nigga till the end
We share
We care
We ride
We didn’t hide
We had everything in common when it came to rap and movies.
Jasper was like a friendly Casper that influence me to the positivity road.
But what struck me was that he ended up being paralyzed by a group of disgraceful wannabe Crabs that dress like crap with bullets bleeding out on his lower back Lord it should’ve been me not him.
His life was ruined when he ended up in a wheelchair.
He was only 13 like my age .
He was so young and so was I
A victim by the hands of a wannabe
They might’ve wet my homeboy up but they couldn’t shut him up forever with them bullets
My homeboy still lives.
I love this guy like a brother and always eternally.
He’s wasn’t no water to me he was thicken blood to me in my sickening system.
He was my family.
But all I know is that I made it as a poet and this is dedicated to all the bloods that I respect growing up with in Houston for 12 years and to the other bloods stay up and keep your head up.
Jasper is my ride and die till the end
Titus Devante Scott is my side nigga
Jamarkus Dwayne Henry my ride and die till the end
And everybody that I grew with in Trinity Gardens in Houston down to that 77016 I’m still loyal and bout it.
Trinity Garden Bloods 4ever till the casket drops.
Copyright © Cmack Estevez | Year Posted 2016
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Cmack Estevez Poem
Don’t throw it away
I never had lots of people that actually believed in me as a kid . I always had these delusional thoughts that one day everybody would love me and believe in me. Well it came eventually to this day when I left poverty forever. I always wanted to be this to be that but it was all talk . Someone use to tell me if you want to be somebody you’re going to put the effort , be discipline and work your way up. The ego the cockiness the arrogance and the ignorance will destroy you instantly and you’ll feel very heartless in your heart. Never throw it away over those traits never, listen and feel emotion that you think the people are right and don’t believe in you that you can be something. Your dreams , Your opportunities , Your hopes , Your passion and you being a somebody is all on you to make it come true. There’s no easy path I always tracked it down all my life and I fail every time it takes patients it takes efforts it takes to have another plan another opportunity to search what you want. The world can’t help you you are helping yourself the world can’t owe you. It doesn’t define you , you do. You can taking it if the world don’t owe something and give something to you easily but you might fail. There’s no excuses for you to say you have talent you have lots of creativity and you’ll feel in your thick minding skull that if you use it for an easier path then the world will make you feel embarrassed and humiliated.
Without practice
Without effort
Without a plan
Without hard work
You fall you throw it all away based on just talent you can’t be build and rely on talent and creativity to be successful and make it. Every human has it not just you. Ego and being cocky destroys your images it kills your chances. Be patient Persevere your way to greatness. Search and feel the effort by doing the work use your mind have a plan use your full potential because if you don’t then your dreams will remain a fantasy and not a reality. The world wants us to face our challenges to overcome and improve. Without it we all collapse. WE all need challenges to improve our ethics and talent. If you throw it all away then what’s the point of being a somebody ? Young people need to understand that talent creativity having an ego and being so better than the world and better than everybody and the world will be much very easier on you is actually more to it. Don’t let this destroy you because if you don’t believe in yourself then you’ll never be good enough . If certain people don’t believe you have a good future then ignore them and chase it. The struggle is real but we can overcome it by making the struggle into our dreams turn into reality of our wants and highly doubts of desire.
If you throw it away you’re losing
If you throw it away you’re pointless.
If you throw it away you’re hopeless.
And if you throw it away you won’t be good enough to be a somebody.
Stay in school be patient it’ll come get the amount of education and work hard you just have to focus and feel the pride of greatness within you to improve and lastly chase it and go get it.
Copyright © Cmack Estevez | Year Posted 2016
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Cmack Estevez Poem
Like Father Like Son
Clarence X was a poet
A poet that was trained by William Shakespeare and inspired him to ignore his troublesome of selling drugs , and become a poet of positive so, he gets train and he enjoys it and learns the deep expression meanings.When William Shakespeare left the world, Clarence X was lost and all alone but he used his mind and William's advice and wisdom to continue on his journey as a poet and never gave up when he died. Clarence X words of poetry began to improve and his heart lies in Shakespeare's teaching and his magnificent work. The days has past and Clarence X meets a girl name Isabella and falls in love later on and has a baby name Clarence X Jr therefore, The senior would teach the son to not follow the negative path of the burden streets but instead use your common mentality head by focusing on the words of poetry. The senior dies in his sleep when the junior turns 26 and passes his poetry to his only son.
The senior first became a rookie train by Shakespeare in poetry
The senior became a new born legend poet when William died
The senior fell in love and had a son
The senior died a legend when he train and passes his legacy to his talented son
The son is his gift and blessings to the world of creativity
The Junior of poet is his life of the force
Copyright © Cmack Estevez | Year Posted 2016
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Cmack Estevez Poem
What if I can’t make it ?
What if I can’t take the pressure ?
Am I’m good enough ?
Good enough to have an opportunity .
It’s like all my life I’ve been hearing that I won’t be shit because I’m retarded .
I’m ignorant.
I will end up dead like some worthless proof thug .
What if they are right ?
What if I’m not good enough ?
I’m sad
I should die.
Did anybody care when I let go of Love Jefferson and Leonardira ?
Did anybody care when I was at Chicken Express ?
Did anybody care when I wrote poetry ?
Is Christopher Carson Burton myself is trash ?
What if I can’t be good enough ?
What if people can’t accept me as successful as them.
I want to be good enough just like them.
It don’t matter whether you’re stupid
Your gay
Your black brown or white
Never give a damn what people say because you are good enough to push yourself.
All I want is people to look in my eyes and tell me am I’m good enough ?
I want to prove them wrong.
I want to be above
But I’m trying
Don’t give up Christopher repeatedly in my mind .
Don’t give up.
Your Number one.
You got to be number one baby
You fall
Pick yourself off
You cry and whine
Dirt off your shoulders
Stay confident
Walk with swag.
Talk with pride and self esteem feel the vibe in you.
Everybody’s counting on you don’t fail try try your almost there because if you don’t try then people will be right about you don’t ever let go and say you’re not good enough because I believe no I know that everyone has a dream to fly and shall finish.
Copyright © Cmack Estevez | Year Posted 2016
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Cmack Estevez Poem
I hate my life
My souls are damaged it’s full of pure hell that I can’t take it back it’s like listening to that awful country depression music that you can’t stand and you just want to go beyond insane.
Do anybody knows how much I suffer in those goddamn burden battles ? Do any of you lucky non grateful sons of bitches know what I did to get here ? I killed every enemy with my bare hated bloody hands I hated the enemy in Iraq and I don’t regret killing. Saddam Hussein deserved to hang lifelessly. He deserves to be killed but luckily I didn’t slit his throat and hanged him myself but all these terrorist especially Al Qaeda and Bin Laden killed millions and injured millions of victims in New York. I hate these sons of bitches I even hate their kids even slaughtered them with anger. Eventually I was discharged I was injured during the war I got shot in the chest nine times and also a final bullet to the temple that send and knocked me in a coma for ten days. I always thought on May 11 , 2004 that I was going to die and not wake up from my coma. I’m so lucky as of right now when I woke up from the coma . I wasn’t me anymore I was a monster I left my beautiful wife Cassandra I left my kids Seth , Pamela Chloe and Tyrone Jr. heartbroken and then I hit the streets and took and robbed plenty of drugs . What can I say the war changed me it made me worse and worse every struggling day that eventually I heavily overdosed on Crystal Meth and had to go to the hospital. Now I’m here in this goddamn rehab center reminiscing about why in the hell that I hate my useless nasty hopeless fate . I’m a killer always will be . I’m no American hero there’s no happy ending there’s tragic death endings near me. I can’t get my beautiful snow white wife back and for her to understand my pain. I can’t get my life back my kids are nothing to me anymore. I just wished that I could’ve never went to Iraq I should’ve dodged it and rejected it like Muhammad Ali did Vietnam. All day and All night I hear guns in the air pointing at me and three deadly trigger fingers pointing back at the shooter. I hear the bombs boom ! boom ! boom ! I hear the tanks boom boom all freaking day . I hear soldiers screaming while being wounded. I see bullets flying I see blood I see every human corpses blown up into pieces goddamn it what the hell is wrong with me ? Why am I’m in this circle ? I don’t need sympathy I don’t need nobody to say sorry I’m crazy I should kill myself in this circle but I can’t. I want to forget about the war I want to step out of rehab and say I’m better and free from the tragic. I know in everybody’s hearts that you will not give up on me and I won’t give up on you thank you !!! And to my wife Lisa and my kids I’m sorry. Thank you !!!
Copyright © Cmack Estevez | Year Posted 2016
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Cmack Estevez Poem
April 14 , 2016 10 : 32 am
I love you Kobe
You were my hero.
Till the eight now lastly to the 24 .
Last night your memories struck my tears and my happiness.
It’s just so hard that you are fading away from the game.
I realize that I honestly don’t love you of your fame.
I love you because you’re my hero and role model.
You inspired me to not quit.
You inspired me to continue.
Those 60 points I witness last night were a blessing from your talent and heart.
They were our last beloved memory of you.
It made me think to believe in myself.
You’re the real MVP Kobe.
You taught us loyalty.
You taught us to listen
You taught us hard work is important.
Whenever you go I’ll go.
And you taught us dearly to love you and respect you not only as a player but as a human beloved being sent from GOD.
Heroes come and goe.
Zeroes collapses and lets us down
But a Legend like you Kobe is forever eternally.
I love you Kobe.
Thank you for the game of basketball.
Thank you for me and the fans for seeing the moment on a special wonderful game you had deeply inside your sparking heart.
Your heart has touched my heart it pounded me.
I never felt like this before when it came to my hero turned legend.
I don’t care if I have a man crush on you.
I don’t care if I’m obsessed on you as a fan.
Because all I know is that you will always be my number 1 hero my savior my idol and my everything.
I cried last night.
I saw your past games last night.
I saw a growth.
A man.
A hero.
I saw a legend.
I saw your 60 points.
You were amazing , I praises you and follow your path of greatness.
When I go to bed in my deep sleep every night I think of how great and special Kobe is and how I got much love for him. So in closing I will love to say farewell Kobe. See you later no goodbyes. Thank you for the sacrifices and the memories of the game of basketball. And I understand that you have to fade away eternally.
I never let go Kobe.
I never stop thinking of you .
Kobe all day.
Kobe all night.
Kobe a hero.
A legend.
And Kobe I love you forevermore and good luck on your new journey.
Rip Kobe Bean Bryant 1996 – 2016.
This isn’t a goodbye it’s a see you later.
Copyright © Cmack Estevez | Year Posted 2016
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Cmack Estevez Poem
The night that she witness Ghost face
It was a dark tragic night , a girl name Lise was getting ready to watch an Emilio Estevez movie.
That night she gets a call from a strange person lurking somewhere around her house in the dark peaceful shadows. So the strange man on the phone stalks her and ask her what’s her favorite scary movie ? She felt scared and harassed that she hangs up on the wicked mask man . He keeps on calling and quizzed her about horror trivia that she doesn’t know so Lise fails and The man with the white Ghost face mask with a black cloak on his head with a butcher knife in his hand comes after Lise and slays her with a butcher knife stabbing her multiple times in the chest and cut out her throat out and he took her head apart and carry it with him by cooking it in the oven and eating her bloody flesh head off deliciously. The Night that she witness Ghost face has vanished and he kills every pretty teenage girls every Halloween when they are alone in the house . And Her bloody corpse were never found by her family , friend’s or the police.
Rest in peace Wes Craven
August 2 , 1939 – August 30 , 2015
Whisper to a scream
Copyright © Cmack Estevez | Year Posted 2016
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Cmack Estevez Poem
Sunday
No working
No Cleaning
No School
Just relaxation
Not even church
Sunday is the best week of my life especially when football and basketball comes on screen .
I prefer basketball.
Lakers beat the Supersonics
Go Lakers.
Today was a great Sunday for the Packers
I bleed green and yellow they beat the Steelers
I’m a cheese head.
Aaron Rodgers a winner.
Brett Favre was and became a traitor.
Family screaming Go Lakers
Family screaming Go Pack Go
The game ends and it became my best Sunday relaxtion ever.
Leave me alone Mom’s
I’m Trying to relax.
Stop talking baby
Let me watch the game.
No women allow
Guys hang out only
Let’s go Packers Sunday and lastly lets go Lakers Sunday.
Copyright © Cmack Estevez | Year Posted 2016
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Cmack Estevez Poem
What defines me
Christopher Burton
I hear people telling me what really defines me. The people that address me they addresses me as a wannabe thug because the way I act and dress maybe even because I’m brown coming from poverty. Certain people need to wake up and stop being homophobic , racist , judgmental and negative . When are we going to accept gay people as an equal as straight people being in love?
When are the cops going to stop shooting on a black and brown person ?
So I ask myself what defines me and all of you.
The world of define can be hard to search but it takes courage to know that we are not afraid to show the world who we really define ourselves.
Don’t let society defines you as a criminal
Don’t let homophobic define your beautiful sexuality.
Don’t let fear define who you are .
And don’t let anything define you negative till you die.
I define myself as a humble prestigious , proud young brown man walking into the beautiful bright light shadows still living in a happy planet world called Earth
Copyright © Cmack Estevez | Year Posted 2016
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