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Jessie Rae Poem
One day, you'll be dead to me
My life is a hazard to everyone
And myself
My desperate detestation for you
The way you are
What you do
How you breath
My hatred for you is an endless pit
Of Hell and dark memories
The heart inside my weeping chest
is sewn in grotesque shades of purple
and its all your fault
You're a beautiful creature
of misery and despair
the painful tears you shed
slowly pull up the corners of my lying mouth
to my sweet, innocent ears
I want your head on a stake
bloodied scissors in your chest
your blood in a jar
You disgust me
the twinkle in your eyes is a knife to my neck
soon to be turned on you
cutting out every bleeding piece
of your perfect soul
One day you'll be nothing more
then a crying, screaming memory
a haunting melody that plagues my sorry heart
My love for you is a complete lie.
Copyright © Jessie Rae | Year Posted 2015
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Jessie Rae Poem
Silly creature, are you not?
a witness to everything
Silently waiting, watching, gathering
all, yes, but not receiving
Menacing little thing, are you not?
the missed crook of your head
Listening
and no one knows what you relay back
Beautiful drop of blood, you are...
not seen against the trees
You’re not ignored,
but simply a glacial, crimson breeze
You sing a song that knows,
a song that chills to the bone
You follow, you wait, you watch
Could it be for nothing?
What do you do?
During this cold, November evening
A slow pouring rainstorm to this long book I’m reading
Red wine to this loud, cold screeching
Little, hopping, crimson cardinal
won’t you please, just fly away
You have seen too much
You’re not giving up
to the icy, wrong path not seen
A note to you, crying cardinal
Take these scary images and please fly away
Keep silent, keep hidden, keep not here
standing you here is not a feat i can withstand
So horrible, haunting, little red bird
Please, i beg--
leave,
And never be heard
Copyright © Jessie Rae | Year Posted 2015
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Jessie Rae Poem
Grey, melting, dry skin
Are you lost?
Bloodthirsty, horrible creature
You are afraid of the reality--
but you know the nightmare you don't live is true
Lifeless, dead eyes
You see nothing but hunger
You're a cry in the lonely night
a dream, never remembered
Wandering, aimlessly
with your menacing, crippled pace
and your intention to cause pain
To tear into the relations of your long, gone feelings
You're just a death threat to the burned, flaming world
Silly, mangled, tired face
with your lurking, stalking, restless gaze
You long for touch, you cry for resurrection
without saying a single, broken word
You greeted death with open arms
the pain you felt when you knew you were gone
But death gives you a slap to the face
laughing a wicked cackle, he's mocking sly mace
A morbid reality
You're trapped in this dying, apocalyptic dimension
a never ending stab in your crisp, grey chest
a feeling of pain, eternal, doomed depression
And it never ends
a spiral of insanity that won't give you rest
Alone, you're all alone now
no one to run you, no one to help
With your paralyzed gait
and your threatening, guilty eyes
they see nothing, nothing at all
A shot through the head
will surely bring you back
you're not alone forever
Soon the nightmare will end
and you'll be gone once again.
Copyright © Jessie Rae | Year Posted 2015
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Jessie Rae Poem
I'm dying here
alone, in this room
My cryptic thoughts and calming breaths
trying to grasp onto my sense of reality
This mysterious darkness
what will I spiral into?
Held here against my will
in this Pandora's box of crawling poison
Trapped, I’m forced to suffer in my own pathetic grief
lost family, happy thoughts, please come back to me
Swallowing the pitiful memories
of a time yet lost
Ringing, screaming, insanity in my blind ears
I’m not myself, I’m not really here
My reassurance slowly turns to fear
hallucinations, causing me to wear myself out
forcing me back into the molding corners
Medicine is now intoxicating
Tantrums, reflecting a life gone wrong
I can’t escape the fear
an emotional trickle that can’t be covered up
Overwhelming sadistic demeanor
choking on droopy, grey visions
My heavy eyes long for comfort
but i can’t rid His sinister, cheap laugh
I’m restless, I can’t escape or sleep
I want, I crave to be let out
Take me back to the light, the familiar light
but I’m held back in my teasing, cruel subconscious
The realities I push so far behind me
resurface, tormenting me once again
And pull me back in this restraining, evil room
This cold, bleeding, crying, dark room.
Copyright © Jessie Rae | Year Posted 2015
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Jessie Rae Poem
My quill bleeds out thick, black blood
Staining the papyrus
ripped beneath my light pressure
of cold, heavy emotions
The stick of the ink scorched on my skin
Offers me liberating relief
Put me back down, it whispers
it whispers, so sweet
But it's chained to my hand
it will never see rest
Crying, sobbing
rivers of soft regret
Relief is unseen anger
wanting sleep, wanting freedom
Alarming, small voice
in my head, seek help, please
Stop this mourning
Trapped inside its shallow ink heart
is the knowledge, the fear, I am addicted
It's far too late
knowing, not wanting to believe
That I'm gone, I've left, through the old, worn gate...
Now I'm trapped in this field
of crying, sleepy daisies
This meadow of false hope
A tired, scary wasteland
of cruel, twisted jokes
And I won't lie
I desperately want out
but I can't cry, can't stop the flow
My pen is now broken
and so is my newfound outcry of poor, sad emotion.
Copyright © Jessie Rae | Year Posted 2015
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Jessie Rae Poem
My mind sings a tired song
Midnight, it comes
As an angel
Soon to be a demon
A demon painting my burning, weak soul
I wish it would end
It's a knife in my chest
Clawing out my melting ears
Tearing me apart
Playing endlessly
Endlessly
An awful cry
In a dark, sealed room
An echo
Filled with the hopelessness of the air
A shadow of my mortality
Mocking me
Dear gruesome song,
Please, pass me by
Insanity
Smothering me until my last breath
Obstructing my escape
From this shallow, black dream
I plead with this broken strain of sound
I beg, let me live
Torture another
Sad, unsuspecting soul
But it's like a leech to my bruised skin
A parasite invading my body
Tormenting me
As i sit in a pool of my mortifying despair
Oh beautiful, horrible melody
Leave me alone just this once
I'm screaming, crying
I beg you
Leave my defenseless mind
Go haunt another weak, helpless life
My mind sings an empty song
An infection to my abandoned soul
When will it end?
Copyright © Jessie Rae | Year Posted 2015
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Jessie Rae Poem
i skip and i dance and i twirl and i sing
flowing and loose and free and clean
farther and farther and farther away
farther and farther
i'm going, away
tripping and falling and gasping and wincing
wincing and poking and squinting and helpless
i'm looking around as i sit on the ground
it stings and it hurts and i want to cry
i’m not a child
i pick myself up and i breathe and i breathe
wincing and poking and squinting and painful
walking home i’m walking home i’m almost home
ouch.
mom! please
i scraped my knee
i need a band-aid.
Copyright © Jessie Rae | Year Posted 2016
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Jessie Rae Poem
Where are you, sweet glow
I’m trapped
lost in this sad place
This place place of regret
of dark, and of spirits
The light, I need her now,
to bring be back…
To life? No, there is none
None, it’s gone, we’re gone, but we aren’t
Purified regret
dripping down the blood stained walls
Down my cheeks, it drips down to the floor
Lost, it’s gone
Reminding me
buried beneath is just an empty void
Where is it?
Not here, no
But you are, I’ve seen
I’m wrong, I’m just lost
always just lost, alone
Is it you, you whose gone?
No, you’re here,
I’m away, gone
trapped in my own mind
Such a horrible place filled with terror and ache
Insanity has locked it
The door to this place
And thrown the key away
Far, far away
But it is—isn’t it? This place
It doesn’t exist
Where are you?
I’ve not seen
you, are you here?
I must have, a need to be embraced
By the gone, the broken
Please, hold me in your weak arms and weep
But you are not really here
Hold me, sweet loneliness
You are all I have now
Copyright © Jessie Rae | Year Posted 2016
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Jessie Rae Poem
i hope you know to be polite to the tears your pillow has seen
and to hug your blanket once a day
and give your stuffed dog
or cat
or bear
or bunny
a kiss on the forehead so
they know you care about them just as much as they care about you
Copyright © Jessie Rae | Year Posted 2016
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Jessie Rae Poem
If only my dreams could escape into truth
My mind, it seems, I’m going to lose
Whatever happened to long walks and short?
My life right now is a blurry distort
Laughing and singing were just a curtain
Hiding, prying me away from the subconscious burden
But our flowers wilt, and away they die
Liquid depression seeps away from each eye
Through the silence I see
But just don’t record
The light that could never be
Now locked behind her closed doors.
The sun refuses to hide
Though it’s pouring outside
The sky is a dark black hole
Nonexistent to the living world
The world is a bright place
But just at what cost?
My mind, it seems,
I have somehow already lost.
Copyright © Jessie Rae | Year Posted 2016
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