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Best Poems Written by Jerrika Holmes

Below are the all-time best Jerrika Holmes poems as chosen by PoetrySoup members

Details | Jerrika Holmes Poem

Soul Searching

I am one to believe,
That if only people could see,
What’s really, truly me…
…That one day this world would understand.

I am very different.
Yet, common to the eye.
But what’s inside the heart,
Proves that the outside is just a lie.

On average, if you should know.
Based off of the world’s expectations.
That I would be a girl,
With senior salutations.

To make up the perfect woman,
Many elements of normality are involved.
But I am more like a puzzle…
…With important pieces missing.
Therefore, I am close to impossible of being solved.

Beauty, yes I am.
I know I have the smarts.
But the reasons for my insecurities,
I cannot figure out.

I am stuck inside of a shell.
A dungeon that I call my home.
I want to break free…
…Escaping from all of this.
But I cannot escape by being alone.

Yes, there are people by my side.
But ONE cannot escape the wrath…
…Of a Mental Tsunami Tide.

So what do I do for peace?
I observe those of innocence.
Stop.
Think.
And listen.
Then all over, I reminisce.

What do I evoke?
What thoughts do I recollect?
I muse over the teachings that I received from the inexperienced.

I tend to allow myself to believe,
That if I studied another’s ways,
That I would be able to flee,
From OUR past.
The crippling days.

So why am I so self-doubting?
So quick to be pessimistic?
If only I had the answers,
Would be how quickly I could end it.

No, I am not JEALOUS!
I understand half of what I am worth.
The other half will come along,
With self values and soul search.

I don’t mean any harm,
To those that I offend.
Personality is key.
And not a heart.
But a character is what I have to mend.

So on this journey of security,
And transforming into a woman of hope and faith.
Please allow me to be myself,
So that I can notice the traits that I have to change.

And once I have improved myself.
Certainly I will see.
Things that are worth my time…
….And the things that are not worth me.
Please be patient with me,
For we are on this journey simultaneously.

Details | Jerrika Holmes Poem

'911'

I flood my pillows with tears.
I cry myself to sleep.
Everyday I continue to wake up,
My soul grows a little more weak.

I understand that I am not perfect.
I punish myself when I am wrong.
But are my imperfections the cause of 
why,
I'm existing in this world alone.?

My heart is that of porcelain.
I create the illusion of it being made of 
steel.
I try to pretend that I am emotionless,
Because if I came to believe that, what 
pain could I feel.?

Every day I wish to be understood.
Or atleast have a voice that could be 
heard.
Every night I wish to gain my wings,
And fly away with the fragile white birds.

My mistakes are of the unordinary.
My faults could never be forgiven.
When you're living a life, being THE hell 
on Earth...
What's the point of even living.?

I'm that avalanche on the mountains.
I set fire to the rain.
I destroy the flawless paintings of your 
life,
Without you even knowing my name.

I'm the devils advocate.
His child against my own will.
In my heart, I want to create your smile.
But your happiness is what I'm designed 
to kill.

I try.
I try my hardest to be great.
I live with God in my heart.
But if I'm told that I am evil...
Worthless...
The smallest element of being holy...
Who do I believe.?
Where would I start.?

I'm confused with my existence.
I strive for a brighter future.
But when there's darkness lurking inside 
of me,
My spirit becomes in need of sutures.

I cut.
I bleed.
I want to feel the pain escape from inside 
of me.

It's a mental process.
In the end I'm only left with scars.
The pain has not escaped.
It's trapped in my heart, behind the bars.

I'm stuck, held captive in this jail.
It's my mindset, I call it home.
I want to feel alive... Be happy.!  Carefree.
But the way to live free, is to free these 
thoughts from my dome.

I beg for your forgiveness.
Let me love you.
Make you smile.
Be everything that you need.
(Silent Pause...)
Jerrika, how can you love someone else, 
when you don't even love me.?!

I wish I understood how to love you, 
Jerrika...
But you're to complex to comprehend.
Messed up that the being inside of you,
Doesn't even recognize you as a true 
friend.

So what do I do.?
I've strayed away.
Help me, Lord.!
I've been astray for quite some time.
If you asked me, there's no good left inside of me.
Why.?
Because I lost it all when I lost my mind.

9/11
Terrorist Attack Against Myself.
Someone please call 9-1-(Voice fades out...)

Details | Jerrika Holmes Poem

's-Note'

Heart expecting more.
Face smiling less.
Mind racing rapidly.
Soul needing rest.

Maybe I should take this life of mine 
tonight.

Attempting to live right.
Reality; existing wrong.
Dealing with pain for 20 years.
Fighting a losing battle for too long.

Maybe I should take this life of mine 
tonight.

Reading through the bible.
Praying to my Lord.
Struggles are still here.
Faith becomes ignored.

Maybe I should take this life of mine 
tonight.

Alone... Lonely... Myself.
Manic, distraught thoughts I've dealt.
Love... Affection... Esteem; Extinct.
Wrist, Paper. Knife, Pen. Blood; Ink.

I think I'm going to take this life of mine tonight.

Details | Jerrika Holmes Poem

High.!

I need to be free.
Get out this place.
Go somewhere,
That I know I'm safe.

Go to a terrene,
That I haven't been to in a while.
Forget about the agony.
And produce a lifelong smile.

Maybe I need the peace.
Maybe I need the love.
Maybe I need to gain my wings,
And fly high to my fathers kingdom above.

I need the un-needed.
And I want the unknown.
These are the suicidal thoughts,
Traveling through my mind as I tend to feel alone.

The only place that I can evade to,
Is in my own mind.
There I dream of being elated.
Believing everything is just fine.

I want to fly.
Soar.
Escape to a land of the un-imagined.
Tell my story to others like me,
And become an advocate legend.

Yep I'm blessed.
Yep I know that I'm free.
Sitting here in my tract,
Omitting catastrophe.

Kill myself.
Eradicate myself.
Crucify myself.
Just to explain myself.

You don't comprehend.
Most likely never get it.
Oh well, I ingress my zone,
Every time that I hit it.

Goodbye Mortals.

Details | Jerrika Holmes Poem

Happy Anniversary

Happy anniversary love.
Last year I would have never known,
That on this day we would be standing here, going 1 year & 5 months strong.
For you I will cross the oceans.
Together we could sail the sea.
I would climb the highest mountain.
If it determined that we would remain as "we".
I love you is worth more than a thousand words.
With each syllable you speak it slowly takes my breath away.
Mesmerized by your thoughts.
Your eyes, my eyes, we caught.
I reminisce about that September day.
Lovely, my love, you are.
Caring to me, you should stay.
My love, to you I give.
God would not have it any other way.
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
Your beauty, love, it shines so bright.
Internal beauty, a beautiful heart,
Has guided this girl towards an angels light.
Yes, you are my angel.
With me through smiles & tears.
More than love, but a true friendship,
Will glue us together for continuous years.
We yell,
We argue,
We fuss,
We fight.
But that doesn't mean that the bond holding us together isn't tight.
Thinking of you,
The words continue to flow,
Straight into the sea under the moonlight skies.
There, I lay with my soulmate.
As he wipe away the tears from my eyes.
But this time, pain is different.
I shed my tears of joy.
I think about everything going good for me.
From our wedding, to you holding our newborn baby boy.
There is so much to live for.
When I say so much, yes I mean you.
You're my hero.
My angel that has never flew.
I don't want you to rush & gain your wings,
Because that means no more time we could spend.
I thank you for everything you have ever done for me.
Including this broken heart that you helped to mend.
Beams of sun rays shine on me.
Reminding me of the sunshine that I call my own.
Dark clouds soon rest above me,
When I think about how I have done him so wrong.
I admit my faults.
I just hope that you could forgive.
Without you how could I remain peaceful?
Without you how could I live?
I need you to be my guidance.
An angel to show me how I am weak.
Help guide me, hold my hand.
Teach me to prevent the tears from starting to leak.
I pour out my heart & soul.
With you, I expect the same.
We had each others back.
Loved one another.
Before learning each others name.
I really do love you.
I need you to understand that my words are true.
Know in your heart that I care.
I cherish my angel.
Forever into eternity I will remain in love with you.
Smile for me my love.
Plenty of x's & o's.
My head could not stop love.
Because you are who my heart chose.

Details | Jerrika Holmes Poem

Lonely.!

Only if I was not a loner,
Only if I was not afraid,
Could I execute these memories of existance,
And sit back and watch these memories fade.

Only if I knew myself,
Only if I had no fears,
Could I sit here and let pain take over my body,
And the numbness of my sorrow clean up my mind and kill all of the tears. 

What do you do when you feel you have nobody?
What do you do when you feel insane?
Where can you go when your mindset wanders,
And the feeling of joy has not been the same?

It's just a delight when you feel that your happiness,
Sadly comes along with somebody elses grief, 
It's just a madness that your only happiness comes when you put your own soul through 
misery.

I understand that this place is not for me. 
I understand that my kind does not fit in. 
I understand that I am only one of a kind and that my kind, in this world, could never win. 

I scream. 
I yell. 
I fight. 
I run.  
I try to get the hell out of this place. 
But it only seems to me that I am loosing yet another race. 

Everytime I get close. 
Or atleast come to believe that I am free, 
This finish line for death is replaced with everlasting harmonizing agony. 

Oh so you say that I am crazy. 
Oh so you say that I am lame. 
Dead in this zone, floating on these sheets,
My victory has now came.

Details | Jerrika Holmes Poem

Love Me Or Loose Me

Love has never changed.
Being in love has stayed the same.
However my flaws and our problems,
Has pushed your heart away.

I've tried to make it complete.
Put in effort to make it work.
Instead you flaunt my faults,
And pushed me face foward into the dirt.

Moonlight over seas.
I think of the old us.
The two that were were wrapped up together,
By true friendship minus lust.

I sit and think of everything.
I prayed that we would get it back.
But I guess our bond was not strong enough,
And respect for each other we both lacked.

Over the course of the last year.
As our problems started to persist.
There were less hugs and less smiles.
And more arguments we could not resist.

But once did I ever,
Scream I did not love you anymore.?
I knew that it would be trouble,
Once you were on the other side of the door.

Lies and strong words.
Has brought us both to hate.
But we being the lovers,
Control our own fate.

I've cried too many times.
Now I'm left with limited tears.
I've decided to transform them,
And save them for our happier years.

If we are over,
We're over.
Your love is not there.
But just because I'm not stressing,
Does not mean I don't care.

The end of us means love,
Has finally taken its trial.
But I am not one to say...
...I am not in love with you...
Because then I will be in denial.

It takes two to make it work.
We failed because there is no effort.
No trust.
Leave two hearts broken on the floor,
Walk away if you must.

I've stuck around for so long.
Because I still see the same potential.
You may have changed from being RAMAR,
But you still live up to the same credentials.

Maybe I see more in you.
Than what I may see in myself.
Maybe I'm not playing the cards right,
That our Father has dealt.

You have an important decision to make.
My mind has been made up all of this time.
Are hands may not be holding on,
But your heart is still holding onto mine.

Details | Jerrika Holmes Poem

'disintegration'

I really feel as if my soul is going to DETERIORATE right before my eyes.
Watching everyone LIVE while my life is slowly passing me by.
Embedded inside of a chamber that I have started to call my HOME.
Praying for a SANE release as I continue to fight this war alone.
...Life isn't too attractive...

Details | Jerrika Holmes Poem

How I Feel About You...

So yeah it’s been a crazy month,
Which means only crazy years to come.
But I will travel through any type of hell with you…
…Because now we’re united, harmonized into one.

I’m the moon and you’re my sun.
You bring light into my cloudy day.
Just your touch, your smile, your essence…
…Tends to excite me in every way.

With you I shall experience joy.
Without you I shall experience pain.
But even through our hardest moments together,
The sun is always guaranteed to shine after it rains.

You hold me.
Help mold me,
Into the woman I am today.
I could never be any less than lucky…
…To hear those three words I never imagined hearing you say.

I mean it when I say I love you.
And you’re the fresh air to which I breathe.
I just really wish there was a way you could hold me in your arms everlastingly,
But as to every fairytale, there’s a time for my special one to leave.

I know that my love shall come back.
But that will never take the pain away that I’ll experience when you are gone.
I just need you to trust me that you are my heart,
And I’ll never just get up and move on.

I believe you deserve the world,
Because you are the sweet meaning defining every word I write.
And I’m sitting here expressing my love to you…
…On our first of many special nights.

My heart, my smile, my joy, my love.
You are the one who will forever complete me.
Promise me that when you’re gone away,
And I can’t see your face…
…That you will forever miss me.

Thanks for even taking the time out to stick with me.
It shows me how much you really care.
Living in a world without love from you…
…Is a pain that I never wish to bare.

Details | Jerrika Holmes Poem

Negativity.!

This world is so evil,
Despite the good days.
I'm fighting to get out...
...Of this mind contolling maze.

Caught up in temptations.
Tasting forbidden fruit.
The smarter ones that speak the loudest,
Are always the ones kept on mute.

They won't feed into the devils lies.
Or let society get into their heads.
But instead of taking a stand for what they believe in,
They sit back and let our streets continue to be covered in red.

The haters really want to see me fall.
But I just can't give up now.
Being a clone of another ones soul,
Is something my conscience just wouldn't allow.

I demand to be my own person.
I will live for what I know is right.
Completing my own individual purpose,
Would be what allows me to walk into my fathers light.

I understand that through my struggles,
I will rejoice and be free in the end.
But I won't be around to live within that happiness,
If I was to stop in my tracks and let them win.

No more will they witness the tears,
That I have continued to shed all these years.
Never again scared to face my fears,
Because I know my time to shine is near.

Smiling down on all the haters.
Commending all the fakes,
For making me believe that NO MORE is the only thing left that I could  
take.

Now I focus on my destiny,
Because I understand what I am worth.
When you keep your head up as negativity is pulling you down,
Never again could you get hurt.

Speaking out to others similar to myself,
Each of us are precious jewels.
Living for ourselves and no one else,
For our own life we now make up the rules.

...It's up to us if we decide to break them.