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Tamara Ellestad Poem
To my daughter, forever 14 and forever a pianist.
What a beautiful instrument for a beautiful and talented young lady.
I smile as I see you there, hearing you play, composed and written melody.
Then it hits me, I realize it’s my imagination, something surreal and unknown.
I take a second glance, my heart aches, because there is an empty seat at the piano.
Copyright © Tamara Ellestad | Year Posted 2022
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Tamara Ellestad Poem
Harder than others
Hi baby, its mom having another hard day.
I need you back to finish our plans and tell you things I need to say.
Your strength is necessary to get me through the hours.
Each day seems like a week and fresh blooms are wilted flowers.
Although your light was dim, you brought brightness to those around.
Your smile so perfect and the words you spoke cleverly profound.
Why you danced with the devil, only those in the dark could understand.
But God won, he gave you wings and had an angel take you by the hand.
Please visit me again as I lay with my eyes closed trying to fall sleep.
Wrap your wings around me when I silently or loudly weep.
I am missing you and hopeful to be with you again.
If I could press rewind, I’d go back to do it over from when your life began.
Some days I can get through shedding sporadic tears as a mourning mother
Then some days is its unbearable and harder than others.
Copyright © Tamara Ellestad | Year Posted 2022
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Tamara Ellestad Poem
For my daughter, forever 14, forever loved, never forgotten. 4/16/2008 - 9/11/2022
I find myself not breathing, I can’t catch my breath
I can’t accept your gone and won’t accept your death
Nothing can fill the hole left in my heart
How can you be so close, but we are now forever physically apart
I can’t imagine another day with the loss of you
I can’t deal with the grief; I can’t stomach the new
No one can say anything to make me feel better
What I resort to now is writing you daily letters
New normal I shun because, this can’t be it
The eternal flame for you, the wick stays lit
I can’t stomach the pain, the unbearable sorrow
I won’t accept your death, I still think you’ll be back tomorrow
Now I talk to a box full of your ashes
Hoping you’d come out and wipe tears dripping from my lashes
I hold onto the memories all of them so beautiful and bright
I am now in the dark and you are in the forever light
My beautiful daughter is now dancing in the sky
When your loved ones back here are still wondering why
I am jealous of the angels who have you in their presence
Please give me the strength to get through this in your absence
I love you forever daughter, I will get up every day
To tell the world about you because there is so much to say
Copyright © Tamara Ellestad | Year Posted 2022
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