Best Poems Written by Ciar Luminous

Unmet Dreams

I remember just a few years ago
I remember me feeling so excited
I couldn't resist smiling
I couldn't resist thinking of my future
Today I'm going to be honest
Honest with you and
Honest with myself
I have never archived much 
I have never enhanced my life
Life has been hard for me to Override
Listening to sad Soul music 
Has been my life for a decade
Pure hate
Pure misery I remember
Beating myself up with shame
So much hate it wouldn't go away 
So much tears my pillow became wet
So I would hide from my mother
I remember clicking at everyone
It's just feels like yesterday
Well honestly I still am angry,
Don't worry you wouldn't understand
Do you know ?
Do you know how it feels like?
Going to bed with a sore heart
Who am I kidding ?
I am just a boy who was ment to sleep at the kitchen
I guess you are wondering
Yes life has gobbled up my SOUL
I feel HELPLESS
PLEASE HELP ME.
I lost my pride very recently
Thanks to my life I have nothing to lose
Thanks to God for bieng angry at me I understand nor I did nothing wrong
May my SOUL regain sound through
Music and time, I doubt it .
Do you know
Do you know how it's like to be the only one in the family without a job
Do you know how it's like to be begging in prayer
Crying from the inside I PRAY
For I have realized that I am the PROBLEM HERE 
it's hard bieng a burden to Mom and sis but I have no choice 
I have no one to turn to
I have again realized that without a soul I can't be living
But I am ,I wonder how ?
I remember bieng in hospital 
Laying there in bed 
I felt different 
I felt like the torture was over
The hate was over 
The rumors were over 
I felt like I was in a quiet place 
Where nothing matters 
No thoughts just me and the dark 
No hurt ,no pain I still feel it when I hold my breath 
It's me "Him" he who God does not know
Him who has no degree but a matric certificate
He who is jobless at time flies by
He who is a stranger to many 
Undermined by many 
But hey I'm okay with that
It's my life I'm used to that 
Actually NO ,I'm not OKAY 
I FEEL LIKE CRYING
CRYING UNTIL THE OCEAN SPEAKS TO ME
CRYING UNTIL I BLEED 
CRYING UNTIL I BECOME weak 
Until ... God knows what .
Unmet Dreams.
Based on a true story.

Copyright © Ciar Luminous | Year Posted 2020