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Best Poems Written by Sarah Portrey

Below are the all-time best Sarah Portrey poems as chosen by PoetrySoup members

Details | Sarah Portrey Poem

The Cookie Monster

The Cookie Monster

I’m so determined this time.
Nothing can stand in my way.
I’ll lay off the chocolate and wine,
And lose all this weight I have gained.

I’ll stay to group every week,
And always follow the plan.
Each plate will be full of speed.
I’ll soon be a brand new woman.

First week and I’ve lost 4 pounds.
I feel like I’m on cloud nine.
At home, fruit and veg abounds.
It was worth giving up the wine.

In a month I’ve lost a stone.
I’m not even tempted by bread.
I keep track with an app on my phone,
But then up pipes a voice in my head...

“You don’t need to measure your cheese,
And why should cake be a syn?
Just eat whatever you please.
Your friend does and she’s really thin!”

I ignore the voice this time.
But it does feel a little bit harder.
Even though I know they’re not mine,
How I long for the sweets in the larder.

But I’m good and I stick to a hifi.
At 3 syns it is a nice treat.
I feel in control of my life.
When I choose wisely what I eat.

Next day the voice has come back.
“Come on, you’ve had a hard day.
It’s just a little snack,
No one will know anyway”

“You walked for miles this morning,
And you’re too tired to cook.
Look at you, you’re yawning,
Just don’t check the syns in the book”

Go away stupid voice, you’re annoying!
I want to lose this weight

“But it’s only one cake, you’re so boring.
Who eats fruit at a party???
And if you keep eating those beans,
Everyone will say that you’re farty!”

“People will think you’re insane,
Sitting there with your scan bran.
Tomorrow just start again.
It’s only one day off plan”

So I have a bit of a binge.
Sausage rolls,  cake and some wine.
Looking back at the day makes me cringe,
But I did have a really good time.

At the scales I have stayed the same.
But I was easily led.
I’m not the one to blame,
It’s the monster inside of my head.

The next week I’m feeling quite blue.
The monster has advice to dispense.
“Have some cookies, have chocolate too.
Have  some cake, you know it makes sense!”

“Have a burger and chips, have a pizza.
Have some ice cream, have the whole tub.
It’s the only thing that’ll please ya,
While you there, have a meatball sub!”

“Who cares if it makes you feel bad?
You’ll feel good first and that’s all that matters.
Believe me, slimming’s just a fad,
And I’ll watch as your weight loss dream shatters.”

“You don’t need to go back to group,
You’ve probably gained a stone”
And so continues the loop,
Wish that monster would leave me alone!

So at last I rejoin again,
I face the scales and go back.
But that monster is such a pain 
Always ready to attack.

This time though, I feel strong
My eyes have been opened, you see
I guess I knew all along
The monster is only me.

Details | Sarah Portrey Poem

Birthday In Lockdown

It’s your birthday so chin up Joolz
But don’t forget to follow the rules
Cos going out is only for fools
And nurses!

As you are stuck in your abode
I decided to write you a birthday ode
But it will probably just be a load
Of verses!

Just cos you can’t go out on the p*ss
You can still take part in a virtual quiz
And have a lager and a packet of crisps
Safe at home.

And while we can’t go to the Roman baths
Or even to visit some giraffes
We can still have lots and lots of laughs
Through the phone.

The birds have all come to your window 
Singing happy birthday, let’s play bingo
Don’t be tempted to let them in though,
That’s just mad!

I know you like to cook and bake
So won’t be short of a birthday cake 
Even if it’s one you have to make,
Don’t be sad.

So I hope you manage to have a great day,
Don’t let this lockdown get in your way,
It can’t go on, or so they say,
For much longer.

Cos one day soon we will be free
To celebrate, Claire, you and me
I promise I’ll take you out for tea,
Or something stronger.

So while your birthday in 2020,
Isn’t quite how it was meant to be,
Memories there will still be plenty,
Don’t you fret.

So enjoy your birthday, this strange year,
And in a while , not far from here,
We’ll get together and raise a beer
To one you’ll never forget.

Details | Sarah Portrey Poem

The One

The One 

I’m not the one who lied to your face
And swore it was the truth.
I’m not the one who tried to make you hide
the inner you. 

I’m not the one who ruined your birthday
Acting all depressed
I’m not the one whose family made you feel like you were worthless.

I’m not the one who insisted 
everything had to go my way
I’m not the one who refused to talk
Or let you have your say.

I’m not the one who agreed to kids
Then said I didn’t want  them
I’m not the one who ran away from
Every single problem

I’m not the one who made you feel 
you had to dim your  light
For fear of making me inadequate
If you shone too bright.

I’m not the one who made you walk
On eggshells all the time
Just for me to smash them up
With no reason or rhyme.

I’m not the one who made a family
And then just walked away. 
With no discussion, no regret, 
just another average day.

I’m not the one who promised 
To take care of your heart
Then waited ‘til the crucial time
To tear it all apart.

I’m not the one who built you up
Just to knock  you down
I’m not the one who hurt your soul
I’m not that kind of clown.

I’m not the one made you feel 
Your whole life was a lie
I’m not the one who broke your faith
In any other guy.

I’m not the one who kept on prodding 
For years after I’d left 
If not at you, then at your kids,
Knowing you’d be bereft 

It wasn’t  me who stole your joy and 
sapped your sense of fun
I didn’t realise that’s what you meant
When you told me you were The One.

Details | Sarah Portrey Poem

Annoying Dentist

I have a pain in my tooth.
But the dentist is somewhat aloof.
“The clinic is dirty,
don’t come ‘til two thirty”.
It already is, that’s the truth!

Details | Sarah Portrey Poem

My Auntie Died Today

My auntie died today 
She was eighty eight
So this poem’s quite messy
Because I am stressy
And not thinking very straight.

I don’t know why I am sad
I hadn’t seen her in years
But when I was told
My blood ran cold
And I even shed a few tears

I think it’s because she died
Of the virus called Covid19
It’s just made me feel
That the threat’s really real
you understand what I mean?

Cos before it was kind of abstract
A growing figure in the news
But now it’s so near 
It increases my fear
How many lives must we lose?

I don’t think I am grieving for aunty.
She’s not the true cause of my sorrow
It’s my parents you see.
Eighty one and Eighty,
What is it’s their turn tomorrow?

I’m sorry this poem is morbid
I was feeling full of hope.
But today’s event
Has left a dent
And I wonder how I will cope.

I feel so much pain for my cousins.
They are devastated.
Even though not young 
She was still full of fun
This just was not anticipated.

Two weeks ago was her birthday
Cos of lockdown she was alone.
Her kids really tried,
To keep her satisfied,
With some cards and a chat on the phone.

Saying “mum next year will be better,
We will celebrate in style”
But despite such care
The virus was there 
And caught up with her after a while.

So please whoever you are,
Don’t think the rules don’t apply,
Stay safe and stay home
And try not to moan
Cos I don’t want any more to die.

Details | Sarah Portrey Poem

Deep

You can’t avoid it, it’s all over the news.
Every clip and video, millions of views.
Varying opinions, not all of them healthy.
Is all this attention because they were so wealthy?

Some people say it serves them right, others post a meme.
These situations aren’t as simple as they seem.
Just because they were rich, is it ok they died?
But what about the millions who have their basic rights denied?

I don’t have the answers, I don’t pretend I do.
But these things get me thinking, even if I don’t want to.
It sends me down a path about the fickleness of fate.
How no amount of money saves you, when it is too late.

How everyone is equal when it really boils down to it.
The media say different, but I guess I always knew it.
When the grim reaper comes, he cares not for your bank balance.
Fate and death and tragedy don’t worry about your talents.

Yes, it was avoidable, but do you really think...
They were contemplating death, as they began to sink?
And now? We know it imploded, they were stuck inside.
But do they know? Do they even realise they have died?

My mind is conflicted, even as I write this verse.
Why haven’t I written poems about those who’ve had it worse?
Maybe cos by now I am desensitised,
To the everyday plights, the needy always criticised.

Underneath it all we are just the same.
Every loss a tragedy, stop looking for blame.
Embrace every moment, before your endless sleep.
When you think about it, it’s really not that deep.

Details | Sarah Portrey Poem

Insomnia

If I fall asleep now I will have 8 hours,
That’s more than enough.
Most nights I only get 4 or 5,
And wake up feeling rough.

If I fall asleep now I will have 7 hours,
That’s still, I’d say, a surplus.
But even as I close my eyes,
I start to feel quite nervous.

If I fall asleep now I will have 6 hours,
That’s still a decent sleep.
So come on! Switch off brain,
Don’t start me counting sheep!

If I fall asleep now I will have 5 hours,
That’s going to have to do.
I’ll clear my mind of all my thoughts, 
Oh damn I need the loo.

If I fall asleep now I will have 4 hours,
I’m going to be so tired.
What if I fall asleep at work?
I hope I don’t get fired

If I fall asleep now I will have 3 hours,
Is that too much to ask?
Who would have dreamed going to sleep
Would be such a mammoth task?

If I fall asleep now I will have 2 hours,
I suppose it is better than nothing.
Maybe if I pretend to sleep,
My brain won’t realise I’m bluffing.

If I fall asleep now I will have 1 hour,
so I’m not trying any more.
Forget it I will just have no sleep,
And that’s when I start to snore.

Details | Sarah Portrey Poem

Learning

We’re worried about your son.
He’s missing too much school.
If his attendance drops below 90%,
It will break all our rules.

I can’t go to school today, Mum.
My stomach feels so sick.
People might be mean to me,
That school is full of pricks.

We’re worried about your son.
It’s your responsibility.
We need him here so we can test him,
To check his ability.

I can’t go to school today, Mum.
Every day I try.
But something inside me just freezes,
I promise it’s not a lie.

We’re worried about your son.
He is missing his education,
We’ve accommodated his whims but,
We can’t keep being patient.

I can’t go to school today, Mum.
I’m sorry it makes you sad.
I try so hard to force myself,
But it makes me feel so bad.

We’re worried about your son.
His absence is unauthorised.
Yes, we agree it’s mental health,
But without proof our hands are tied.

I can’t go to school today, Mum.
I still feel very worried.
I’m trying so hard to get better,
But school just makes me feel hurried.

We’re worried about your son,
We’re running out of time.
It is our duty to inform you,
You are liable for a fine.

I can’t go to school anymore, mum.
It’s something I can’t face.
I desperately wish I could fit in,
But I just feel out of place.

I am so sorry Son.
For pushing you to conform.
Letting others make me believe,
you have to fit in with the norm.

I am so sorry Son.
For adding to the pressure.
I hope you still know, I love you so.
Beyond any earthly measure.

I am so sorry Son.
For causing you more stress.
I should have known of everyone,
You knew you the best.

I am so sorry Son.
For normalcy I was yearning.
But slowly you have shown me the way.
And Son, I am finally learning.

Details | Sarah Portrey Poem

The Spice of Life

I’ve always known roses are red.
It’s just something that’s often been said.
And that violets are blue,
But I know that’s not true.
My rainbow flower, I’ll take you instead.

Details | Sarah Portrey Poem

Mother and Daughter

I wake to hear you crying, calling out to me.
I wearily open my eyes, it’s only half past 3.
I sigh, roll over, cover my ears, trying to ignore.
But your persistent need for me, just grows more and more.

Eventually I go to you, and see you’ve wet the bed.
I feel bad making you wait so long, but these nights fill me with dread.
I clean you up and change the sheets, get you a small drink.
I go to leave, but you reach for me. And my heart starts to sink.

I climb into bed beside you and cuddle you in close.
I’m exhausted but I know it’s now, that you need me the most.
I push your hair away from your eyes, and slowly stroke your face.
Sing to you a lullaby, the song Amazing Grace.

Eventually you settle and we get much needed rest.
Some nights feel worse than others, our very own endurance test.
Your night-time escapades don’t stop you waking with the sun.
I sigh, remembering a time when my life was more fun.

I help you dress, and you complain about the clothes I choose.
I ask you to pick for yourself, but of course you refuse.
You watch tv and there is peace, if only for a while.
You sing along to the music, and I cannot help but smile.

I take you out for dinner and have to cut up your food.
You spill your drink, a woman tuts, people can be so rude.
I long for the future when this is not the case.
But immediately feel guilty when I see your innocent face.

We go home and I give you a bath, and everything’s wrong for you.
The shampoo hurts, the water’s cold, and then you need a poo!
Finally, your pyjamas are on, and I settle you down to sleep.
You fight it, I am so drained, I feel like I could weep.

I know I should enjoy this time, but sometimes it’s so tough.
I love you so much, but I wonder, if I am enough.
I’m lucky just to have you here, and I know that one day.
I will look back and regret, wishing your life away.

Eventually you fall asleep, and I creep out the door.
Into my own bed exhausted, I can’t do this anymore.
I find myself daydreaming, remembering a time long gone.
Cos even though you’re still alive, God how I miss you, Mum.