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Jonathan Camp Poem
All the things he put you through but you still trust him
You want his image to be bright, it sits dark and grim.
You start to ask yourself if what he did was your fault
All the dark memories he caused stored - locked in a vault
Hidden from society, hidden from yourself
You get so mad, so frustrated, so worked up
All your emotion stirring like tea in a cup.
Till one day you just lose it all
Tearing up throwing what you own against the wall.
You have lost yourself in a forest of emotion
You wonder if there is a cure, maybe a secret potion.
All hope gone you stare at the wall in silence
Was all the pain worth the little bit of violence
You don't know what is real or what is fake
Praying for god if he can give it one more take
wanna make things right but know they can't get better
All you have left to do is enjoy the rainy weather.
Copyright © Jonathan Camp | Year Posted 2019
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Jonathan Camp Poem
Come take a ride with me
I’ve got some things for you to see
Forget your pain and misery
Don’t think about your history
The people you say you love
Do you really mean it
Because even though you push and shove
They don’t really see it
They understand you want to
But don’t know why you can’t
Did you give them enough clues
Because when you say you love they think you rant
They leave
They don’t tend to hurt you
You sit in disbelief
While the thoughts go through and through
Deeper into head
You start to feel the pain again
You try go to bed
But the meds won’t numb the pain within
Sorry to bring up your mistakes
But it's what I'm here to do
Pain slithers like a snake
And the snakes are here for you
'Give Me Your BEst New Poem' Emile Pinet
10/07/19
Copyright © Jonathan Camp | Year Posted 2019
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Jonathan Camp Poem
Don’t blame it on me
I gave you a warning
It was clear to see
I don’t intend on hurting people
It just sorta happens
It’s like a skill trait
Or a debate
They all see but no clappin
Everyone around me is hurt in a way
Say i ignored you
Or called you dumb
Or said throw your shoes away
I’m not sure what makes me do it
If it's something deep inside
But i can stop
Just need to prove it
So I dig until it hides
I know him I can tell you who it is
It’s some other me
I promise
I can tell by his-
Hm what was i saying
Confused loss of thought
Is this a game that i’m playing?
Am I a christian?
For a second I sorta thought I was praying
Like I looked up to see the foot of my bed.
Not only that
But it wasn’t I
It was some other me instead
Did I hit my head?
Because the other me is laughing
And not at something else
But it is pointed directly at me
He’s sad
Crying
He doesn’t even seem happy
The laughter was fake
A cover of some sort
But it wasn’t fake at all
It’s his crutch
His support
Copyright © Jonathan Camp | Year Posted 2019
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Jonathan Camp Poem
Have you ever signed away your freedom
Let some papers control you
Because that dumb decision made you need em
They say drugs can take you from you
But that’s all fake news
I just need drugs so I’m normal just like you
But I don’t need them anymore
The want is still there though
The want to taste the spores
I’ll be locked up I know though
I’m a minor
Can you wrap your head around that
I don’t even know myself
At seventeen
I want my life back
I’ve been the youngest
At NA meetings at least
They’re in their 30’s and 40’s
I’m still in my teens
I have even got the chips
The highest was one month clean
People can go thirty years
I barely go thirty days without LSD
That’s not all though
There’s a lot more to this story
And trust me when I say
That there ain't a lick of it that’s boring
Copyright © Jonathan Camp | Year Posted 2019
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Jonathan Camp Poem
The harder I fight the harder I fall
Should I just give up and do nothing at all
I wanna quit
Right about now
Give up my arms
Put my guns down
There is now use
When i'm fighting myself
I feel so abused
For this pain that I felt
There’s no point to play victim
When I’m who I should blame
Why get mad at others
When I can’t get over shame
I have seen my worst fear
I’ve witnessed myself make so many disappear
I don’t know why but I can’t shed a tear
Or i can when I’m alone
when it's just me and despair
At this point I think I’m someone different
Want to watch the world burn
When I used to want to make a difference
When I thought they all noticed me
Was when i was the least significant
Guess how that makes me feel.
Well just like I’m blessed with ignorance.
10/7/19
Copyright © Jonathan Camp | Year Posted 2019
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Jonathan Camp Poem
Town Children
10/07/19
Though white as a snowflake
No darker than sand
Umbrellas on hot days
Not to catch a tan
Weird at first
Warm hearted inside
At youth they were nursed
Just like you and I
Were not so different
Towns children
Magnificent
Outside and in.
Copyright © Jonathan Camp | Year Posted 2019
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Jonathan Camp Poem
“If you look left you will see everything you have done.”
Good and bad all displayed into one.
Recollecting your memories because you have the time in the world.
“Now if you look right you will see what you could have become.”
Wondering why and how you didnt get there in life.
But you’re locked up.
Locked up in your own train of thought.
As you sit eyes closed covered up.
You notice that you are the only problem in your world
The only reason things go wrong is because of you.
You feel as if you can't make a thing go right.
“Now what you see behind us is your past catching up.”
You know what you did and it will haunt you.
It will eat you up until you can’t handle it anymore.
Then you hear footsteps.
Closer and closer to the door that keeps you away from the world.
The only thing making you feel comfortable.
They get louder and louder till you feel as if they are in your ear.
So you open your eyes.
It’s dark
The only light is peeking through you window
You see the door knob start to turn
Do you run?
You stay realizing that all you have done is run away from your fears
“As you look straight ahead you will see your greatest fear.”
The door slowly opens
Your heart is beating out of your chest
You see a face
A rather familiar face.
You don't know from where though because your eyes are not adjusted
Then the figure enters the room.
In a very soft voice they say.
“Dinner is done if you want some.”
You calm down knowing the ride down memory lane is over.
Copyright © Jonathan Camp | Year Posted 2019
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