Whities Poems | Examples


Premium MemberTightie Whities


What should I write, what do you think
How's about tightie whities
The kind that get most women all worked up
Divesting themselves of their nighties

Even if you plead you have a headache
She's in no condition to listen
Those tightie whities are driving her crazy
Down below she starts goin' fishin'

All of a sudden your headache disappears
Now it's you who's all gung ho
You yell out “tally ho ride 'em cowboy”
She screams bloody murder “woo ho”

That continues for about thirty-eight seconds
Then collapsing exhausted on the floor
You scream out “got a cramp in my leg”
She yells, “want more, want more, want more!”

Think to myself that's the very last time
It's polka dot boxers from now on
Tightie whities will be the death of me
At my age, I ain't got that long

Ha... a fairy tale!!!
Categories: whities, fun,
Form: List

Premium MemberTightie Whities

Been feeling a bit extra strange today
Really can't imagine the reason
My tightie whities must be a little tight
Think lately, I'm overeating

3X most likely is my new size now
Please keep this our little secret
Sadly my diet has been a bit of a failure
Was trying hard to be my sleekest

I do possess other redeeming factors
I can stand on my head and spit nickels
Not impressed? Then how about this
Can whistle a tune through my nipples

It all comes back to my tightie whities
The sooner I change 'em the better
Think I'll convert to airy clown pants
With polka dots, numbers and letters

Say hello when the circus comes to town
Can't miss me, that's for sure
With the big red nose I'll be wearing
Looking so mature!
Categories: whities, hilarious,
Form: Rhyme


Premium MemberTightie Whities

What should I write, what do you think
How's about tightie whities
The kind that get most women all worked up
Divesting themselves of their nighties

Even if you plead you have a headache
She's in no condition to listen
Those tightie whities are driving her crazy
Down below she starts goin' fishin'

All of a sudden your headache disappears
Now it's you who's all gung-ho
You yell out “tally ho ride 'em cowboy”
She screams bloody murder “woo hoo”

That continues for about thirty-eight seconds
Then collapsing exhausted on the floor
You scream out “got a cramp in my leg”
She yells, “want more, want more, want more!”

Think to myself that's the very last time
It's polka dot boxers from now on
Tightie whities will be the death of me
At my age, I ain't got that long


Ha... a fairy tale!!!
Categories: whities, allusion,
Form: Rhyme

Premium MemberTightie Whities

What should I write, what do you think
How's about tightie whities
The kind that get most women all worked up
Divesting themselves of their nighties

Even if you plead you have a headache
She's in no condition to listen
Those tightie whities are driving her crazy
Down below she starts to go fishin'

All of a sudden your headache disappears
Now it's you who's all gung ho
You yell out “tally ho, ride 'em cowboy”
She screams bloody murder “woo ho”

That continues for thirty-eight seconds
Then collapsing exhausted on the floor
You scream out “got a cramp in my leg”
She yells, “I want more, I want more, I want more!”

Think to myself that's the very last time
It's polka dot boxers from now on
Tightie whities will be the death of me
At my age, ain't got that long


Ha... a fairy tale!!!

© Jack Ellison 2013
Categories: whities, humorous,
Form: Quatrain

Premium MemberTightie Whities

Tightie whities are my normal attire
While composing my marvellous rhymes
Inspired by the freedom my undies provide
Such passion and jubilation is mine

Fully clothed, creativity's quite restricted
Grandiose words stick in my throat
As soon as I divest myself of my trousers
It immediately re-floats my boat

I try real hard to imagine all you poets
Naughty images take over my mind
I'm begging you friends to please cover up
One day we'll see each other on line

It's okay for me, with my Adonis like body
But some of you less fortunate souls
Might want to avoid the total embarrassment
And cover up your multiple folds

Tightie whities are now my normal attire
While composing my marvellous rhymes
Don't often brag 'bout my amazing body
Decided it was certainly about time!


© Jack Ellison 2014
Categories: whities, funny,
Form: Quatrain


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