Tosser Poems | Examples


Premium MemberEmagi Rolls Sheaf

Eric Rolls 'SHEAF TOSSER'

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Categories: tosser, food, poems,
Form: Shape

-treasure Tosser-

This morn' I watched a coin be tossed into the sea,

Glittering and goading of all things merry!

It sang the sweetest song in the moments as it glinted and flew,

It made me smile awhile in soft sincere reminder of you.

Then it sank in somber waning song to the bottom of the ocean floor,

I can't help but wish I'd heard a heartful or a hundred more.

And so I wept a good sum once again today,

Over the coin that fell into the bay!

-end-
Categories: tosser, beauty, care, feelings, longing,
Form: Rhyme


Premium MemberNo More Penalties

Once a coin in Tullamore 

was to decide the final score

the tosser threw high

the evening came nigh

no quitters they called it a draw


14th May 2021
Categories: tosser, judgement,
Form: Limerick

The Bare Handed Mole Toss

Though you might think I seem country
And there's a lot of that in my roots
I was raised metropolitan,
Not much on plows, guns and boots!

Once when my stepson came over
To cut up a fallen tree for wood
I happened to see a dead mole
Right next to my feet, where I stood

My wife said, "Just get rid of it!"
I asked, "Is there a bag around?",
"Maybe some gloves or a tissue?"
About then my stepson looked down

He suddenly picked up that mole
And then tossed it into the trees
That gave me a chill all over,
Without even having a breeze!

My wife laughing, didn't really help
My known lowest of self esteems 
Showing that in no uncertain terms
I'm not the mole tosser of her dreams!
Categories: tosser, humorous, imagery, marriage, nature,
Form: Quatrain

Satisfaction, Part 1 of 4

Keith Richards Hits the Studio

This could be the last time. 
I feel really torn and frayed. 
Shattered. Where are we? Studio B? 
Is anybody there yet? I'm going in. 
Who are all these people? 
Morning Keith, yourself. 
Fragments, jarring shards. 
Electric keyboard, rumba kind of deal, 
the black chicks, harmony. 
Taylor's chords, like salt on porridge. 
Where's Jagger? Over there. 
Climb down off your ego, pal, 
and catch my eye, you tosser. 
Here I am, the beast of burden. 
We've got all these people. 
Horns. Percussion, too. 
"I am waiting," hanging in the air. 
We've got zero, man. 
The rocker locker? Nothing there. 
So what'll we do 
when the whip comes down?
Categories: tosser, inspiration,
Form: Free verse


Phoenix Rose, For Lisa Lewis

Lisa Lewis is CEO of Doorway, a project for the homeless and vulnerable.  The woman is a legend.

Don’t mess with Lisa, she’s a scary
Far out full on punky fairy
Crowned with violent flowers and sage
And riding on her harnessed rage
Through tangled wood and thorny bower
To speak unsubtle truth to power

Don’t mess with Lisa, man, she’s scary
Wise be wise and fools be wary
For she will tread where no man goes
To seek those things that no one knows
Expect no mercy if you cross her
Best be right and not a tosser

Don’t mess with Lisa, she’s so scary
Medusa crossed with Virgin Mary
Bottle, balls, and Occam’s razor
Prosecco, throttle up, and tazer
Wild light to make a diamond shy
And tears forbidden from her eye

Don’t mess with Lisa, man, she’s scary
That’s one well effective fairy
Pierced with wisdom to the bone
Dark metal angel stood alone
Feared and loved by all she knows
A phoenix, from the darkness rose.

© Gail Foster 2016
Categories: tosser, angel, fairy, hero, metaphor,
Form: Rhyme

Premium MemberTossing the Caber

Thomas was a tosser of the caber
Loved to practice in front of his neighbour
Oh boy how she would blush
When he wiggled his tush
For his caber glowed like a lightsabre

Just a fun write about the Scottish athletic event of tossing the caber which is practiced at the Scottish Highland Games. The caber is usually made of larch wood - it is 5.94 tall and weighs 79kg

16th June 2015
Categories: tosser, humorous,
Form: Limerick
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