Short Mumps Poems

A long hot summer
Filled with mosquitoes and gnats
They are blood suckers
Leaving me with knots and lumps
Looking like I have the mumps...

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There was a camel in Egypt with mumps
That infected his humps with huge lumps
   The vet shook his head
   Said, "You're better off dead"--
After finding some new lumps in his rump...

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The Spanish flu started everything off
Now we are excited by a cough
Typhoid Mary, regular gal
Please keep six feet, okay, pal?
Measles, mumps, rubella.
Aids and HIV
And shingles too
Chickenpox
Virus
Sick...

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Serpigo, roseola, German measles, flu.
Shingles, chicken pox, pandemic Corona boo hoo.
Chilling fever, chest pains, aches all the way through.
Muscle fatigue, slap cheek, and mumps poking you.
I feel pretty great today.  How about you?...

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This is how the story goes
Time heals all wounds
Who wrote this?
How do they know?

Tell this to his memory
Tell this to my tears
Tell this to the pain I've felt,
After three dreadful years

Time may heal a lot of things
Such as measles, mumps and woes
Time can heal a lot of things
In matters of the heart, nobody knows...

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I tried a mono rhyme,
but ended up with mumps;
I tried a nursery rhyme,
but mother goose got bumps.
Just when you cinqku got it,
you choka big one down.
Your ode is not so epic;
that rondel won’t come ‘round.
I tanka guy I met here,
Encouraged verse d’light.
Haikudos on your placement;
What I Believe’s just right....

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Yes, of course I am the king and lord of this house.
Sure, you could talk to the Mrs. if she was here,
You're back? Probably better not to wake my spouse,
Sleeping sound, a wonderful woman, a real dear.
Her not being here for days is truly not queer.
Tomorrow is probably not convenient either.
She’s come down with the mumps and rheumatic fever....

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Into each other they bump
And their grievances dump
The Marked and The With-A-Stump
Sticking together:  a clump?
Really, something of magic
Able to challenge logic,
Their wine-filled mouth, mumps
While the marked money pumps…
A resurrection of kicks of their rumps
And mimicry of cows with humps!

One heaven of a reconciliation,
No third-party mediation....

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Morey Mouse made merry,
Mollifying Mallory’s Mama,
Maybe mixing mammoth metaphors

Marvelously mystical, Marmaduke mimed
mingling, meshing, ‘mogrifying magical mites,
Measuring muskrats minding miniature minnows

Meddlesome merrymakers, Mr. Mumbsly mentioned, miffed.
Mesmerized minions made millions, merely making mincemeat.
Mediocre maybe, magnificent Mrs. Mumps meticulously mentioned....

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I"m getting rather faint again
I don"t feel well at all.
My back has gone,my legs both ache
must sit in case i fall

Scurvy,swine flu,measles mumps.
I must have had the lot
I even broke out in a sweat
whilst i was in my cot

The doctor calls,he doesnt care,
Just looks at me and smiles.
I grimace back in pain,not joy.
I"ve just sat on my piles

The end is nigh,and thats a fact.
Of this i can be sure.
My epitaph will surely read..
They couldn"t find the cure...

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New York City workers
Must be vaccinated or
If they show up for work, they will
Be firmly shown the door.

I’m heartened by this mandate
And especially in schools.
It’s time to bid farewell to all
The anti-vaxxer fools.

We’ve all been pricked for smallpox,
For measles and the mumps
And whooping cough and polio
(And sometimes on our rumps!)

So suck it up and take the shot,
Those missing jabs and swabs,
For you’ll be safer and, of course,
You’ll get to keep your jobs....

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