Short Kvetching Poems

When Jesus burst on the fish scene,
Peter saw his net skills were quite keen.
"I don’t mean to be kvetching,
but as long as you’re catching,
can you make them both headless and clean?"


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Of course on his first encounter with Jesus, Peter had this to say:
“Go Away from Me, Lord, for I Am A Sinful Man!” (Luke 5:8)...

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If life did not have glitches,
Then of what would we complain?
There’d be endless founts of riches
And no one would be in pain.

All our nervous tics and twitches,
Since they all would be in vain,
Would just vanish, as would itches
And from kvetching we’d refrain.

Though this fantasy bewitches,
In our lives it’s very plain,
We must cope with all the pitches
Hurled, which no one can explain.
...

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Everyone has aches and pains
When getting older; who complains
Depends, at times, on who refrains
From doing all the kvetching.*

For any sympathy one gains
May dwindle if attention wanes
With every detail one explains,
The story always stretching.

Each bemoaning thus unchains
Annoyance as one’s patience drains
Although what hopefully remains
Is empathy worth fetching.

*Yiddish word for complaining...

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Some hours race by at breakneck speed,
So fast they’re almost blurry,
As if, like fire trucks on call,
They’re in the biggest hurry.

While other hours move like snails
Or just like taffy, stretching,
Until we’re forced to check the clock
To try to keep from kvetching.*

Still, time is not in our control.
We lack the needed powers
To change the pace as minutes
Dash or crawl and turn to hours.

*complaining...

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If all your basic needs are met,
Your bills are paid, no cause to fret,
Whatever food you want, you’ll get – 
It’s then you can be kvetching.

For if you have no place to sleep
And hunger makes you want to weep,
The only thoughts your mind can keep
Might deal with budget stretching.

It takes some chutzpah to complain
When others’ lives are filled with pain,
Yet human nature can’t refrain
From some entitled retching.
...

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