Short Dundee Poems

I once met a young coatimundi,
Vacationing by the Bay of Fundy.
In hopes of staying trim,
He went for a brief swim,
But sixty-foot tides swept him to Dundee.
...

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Mark Cliff had Mark Dundee told "Fcuk"
And rude hands shown for a "Let's bet!"
Driver Dundee of Heavy Truck
With rash armpits at all times wet:
A man one never told "You suck!"
He'd had to whip his own fed pet...

Further, one who would about muck,
After he had spread some bait net:
Whoop! A hard one on Cliff's head struck,
Just saved by a stubborn helmet!
It'd proved to be quite his God's luck,
And why a breathing Cliff was met......

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Juss two “Angelheaded hipsters” 
Dancin’ jazz riffs in da ring,
Teachin’ Liston, teachin’ Rexroth, 
Teachin’ Dylan how to sing. 
Dey be baaad poets.

Used to make da critics howl, 
Den pick da round dey gonna fall.
Smoked da pot to call da kettle 
An example to us all.
Dey be baaad poets.

So juss where do baaadness come from? 
Who done train dem how to be?
Some say William Carlos Williams. 
Some say Angelo Dundee.
Dey be baaad poets....

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There was an old man from Derby
Who begged me to sit on his knee
The speed of his rise
Took me by surprise
No wonder he’s looking guilty!

Inspired by a comment I saw from Viv Wigley where the poet had used the traditional opening line of a limerick 'there was an old' ...

Poem posted with permission of Viv, it was originally written as a man from Dundee but as Viv lives in Derby (which is where I grew up) I couldn't resist using that City!

01/14/18...

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