Thirty-Two
from island corner, big Antrim lad
to Belfast city, a tiny pad
shattered windows, tilted clocks
Goliath had lost his socks
gargantuan giant going mad
Armagh apple girl, any topic
she star-gazed past the misanthropic
vantage point, two cathedrals
Gullion top, polyhedrals
planetarium, telescopic
from county Carlow, wee caitlin girl
one of three sisters, gave you a twirl
ancient bridge, River Barrow
very long, she was narrow
her lordships' capital waters swirl
our Cavan man was miles from the sea
at the Shannon source, that's where he'd be
soaking wet for goodness sake
each day, a different lake
the Breffni county had fish for free
there was a wee girl from far-off Clare
just like The Burren, she made you stare
Shannon Airport, her homestead
banner county, father Ted
her turloughs flowed from Cliffs of Moher
there was a wee man from county Cork
culinary city, knife and fork
stuffed his face, his Mizen head
sorrow and hope he was fed
around Kinsale, then, off to New York
one from London, the other, Derry
these two wee men were very hairy
bendy bridge across the Foyle
really worth the stress and toil?
their Sperrin looks wet and scary
there was an eejit from Donegal
climbed up Muckish, had a great fall
the scree slopes of Errigal
still alive, it's a miracle
his Malin head had no sense at all
this Dublin girl, she lived all alone
yes, you guessed, it's our Molly Malone
from Howth to Dun Laoghaire
she wobbled very weary
pushed her wheel-barrow, skin and bone
there was a wee man from county Down
lost in the drumlins wearing a frown
city edge, mountains of Mourne
disappeared where he was born
the Strangford Narrows, acting the clown
Fermanagh woman, she had two men
both called Erne, she was comedienne
took off like flying-boat
held aloft by petticoat
Atlantic in sight, fell short again
a pretty wee gal from Galway Bay
such savage beauty she went astray
whether Corrib, whether Mask
Connemara man to ask
to Inishbofin she played away
bad-tempered Kerryman lost his ring
by the Killarney Lakes he did fling
butt of jokes, very cruel
Dingle-berry, Carrantouhill
his MacGillycuddys reek and sing
a wee woman from Kildare, of course
the equine county, she rode a horse
the Curragh and Church of Oak
Hill of Allen, met a bloke
fell from her mount far into the gorse
wee Ossory cat from Kilkenny
he lived in a castle with many
his marbles were off the grid
on festival floors they slid
lost them all, he couldn't find any
wee lad from Laois, brains short of an ounce
escaped from jail hard to pronounce
he was nailed into a crate
trickling blood betrayed his fate
and the Garda were ready to pounce
Leitrim lad took drink by the flagon
very short coast, very short wagon
went inland to buy a boat
all-aboard, beer for his goat
so raised a glass, Carrick-on-Shannon
a Limerick lass, she made you think
five lines she wrote, then, ran out of ink
first, second and fifth must rhyme
shorter third and fourth are fine
but must keep their rhythm, all in 'sync'
canny Longford girl made you shiver
banjo playing by Camlin River
she was 'trad' with bluegrass hair
a fortress town, country fair
tinkled and plucked, she did deliver
talkative lad from wee county Louth
he robbed a bank then, headed down south
stopped at Dundalk to have a drink
Garda grabbed him in a blink
that Drogheda jail did shut his mouth
wild west playboy from county Mayo
did for his dad, very own say so
he's a Westport dreaming star
left the pub at Castlebar
shoe hanging out his Ford Mondeo
a wee Meath girl, she was very slim
from Navan or Kells or was it Trim?
crawled into a passage-grave
all by herself, very brave
one leg out, you can still see her limb!
there was a wee lad, Monaghan boy
sibling Virginia, she was his joy
dressed up in his sister's clothes
sexy Clones, no one knows
'cept over the border, Auchnacloy
a Tullamore kid from Offaly
he played around so awfully
he zoomed right in on Zara
next kissed his cousin Clara
then cuddled Brosna unlawfully
this Roscommon girl was very rare
she came from Boyle, had very long hair
web below her knobbly knee
bank to bank across Lough Ree
wrapped up her men, eight legs in the air
this Sligo boy, no good at countin'
he spied some girls down by the fountain
one, two, three, how many more?
his favourite to adore
he chased her up Benbulben Mountain
Tipperary lass, a long, long face
then, she won the Grand National race
cheered from Lough Derg to Cashel
from Nenagh down to Clonmel
loud bells were rung for her steeplechase
a Tyrone joker queued for his tea
Coalisland brew under a yew tree
made a pole, whipped their asses
fifteen balls, such big glasses
all for his Ma and a tidy fee
Waterford lass, many followers
from crystal glass, many swallowers
toast to the oldest city
Viking girl, very pretty
pelmet made from many polymers
Westmeath chancer, at boot of his car
some hooch for the folk of Mullingar
also, Athlone, had some grog
illegal still from the bog
a smiling man who smoked a cigar
wee Wexford lady was on the beach
collecting pebbles within her reach
the sea, then stole her ardour
he left from Rosslare Harbour
lifted her eyes and started to screech!
a wild Wicklow wag went to play
the Arklow shoreline and on to Bray
Sugarloaf, Lugnaquilla
Glendalough, wee tequila
back to Greystones, he's had a good day
Copyright ©
Ian Love
|