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Only Knew
2/13/23
A fu**** up past
Always past fu**** up
It's just me and a cup damn
Still can't put down the damn cup
I am truly sad
How i've been living is sad truly
I can't smile away problems
It's been difficult to put these problems away
I've always had an open heart
But the world, including woman cut my heart open
If you only knew
But you don't care or give opportunity so I knew only
It was not too much to ask
Considering I didn't ask much
You won't even give me hugs
You want nothing to do with me not to hug me
Typical that a lot assume
Meaning you assume a lot
With people you look at the cover then judge as books
Yet let's look at it differently, do books judge?
I have a drinking problem
A severe problem drinking
I can't stop myself
Only briefly myself stopped
I guess I'm not helping
What I have been doing is helping not
Can you help me?
It'll take an army not a meek attempt to offer me help
Every night I just about black out
It all becomes blank in my mind then goes black
Wake up with no memory of how I went to sleep
Often terribly is how my sleep went
I've been too foolish
All of it I was foolish too
But then I quickly changed
Amazing how I changed quickly
Once I reached clarity
It began changing after there was clarity reached
I made differences
My impact caused there to be differences made
I had to be the change
So that there was any change to be
For myself, what good it did
Even after I did good
At the end of day
Just alone like always when the day ends
I guess I'll smoke and drink
Then drink and smoke
Like I always do
This cycle continues on as I do always
Waking up hungover often
Still performing exceptionally well, even when often hungover
I had to put differences aside
For the better good, I was able to put aside differences
To this day, little if any found love
Zero true love found
This one hurts hearts
Like mine all these hearts hurt
All these toxic traits still tolerated
To this day being tolerated still
Organisms not mistake-free, they're always fallible
Meaning they'll be fallible always
It's just not a perfect world
Meaning it's beautiful and ugly yet just not a world that's perfect
There can be no such thing
Or concept nor possibility for a thing as such
Copyright ©
Dalton Ogletree
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