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Searing Pain Reemerges

searing pain reemerges
each time I pass the hospital
     creeping up to burn my eyes
          subsiding with time, but never forgotten

when the doctor gave his prognosis
all Dad’s children were there
     blades of hopelessness hit my heart
          cutting it into pieces

instructions came in his living will
we did as he requested
     wishing I could take this last journey with him
          but knowing he would want us to thrive  

my hand on his, I bowed my head
the puddle beneath me grew with each tear
     another loving memory
          another agonizing drop

many minutes seemed to pass
after machines were disconnected
     too many minutes
          too many memories

August 4, 2020
For Constance’s “Dusty Old Memories” contest

Copyright © Carolyn Devonshire