My puns are not too punny.
They are puny -
so itty-bitty that they have no bite-y.
Like tiny turtles with no turtle necks
or like selfish shellfish
offering no worthy catch,
what good are they when they’re so poor?
My puns – they haven’t got
a piss to pot in!
I hate luch slack of imagination – and
my spoonerisms that aren’t worth
the dime of tay.
Punny yet unfunny
my puny roony RATatouille
loony woony play of turds!
They should dink far sown
to the sodom of the deep gomorrah sea
where Moby’s dick perhaps is berried.
(or pickled maybe?)
I guydress.
Time to put this roam to pest.
You stole his heart right from the start
For just one look and he was hooked
His darling Princess ~ His Sweetest Pea
Then you became ~ His Ratatouille
You made his day ~ You made his night
You shared so much of life together
He’s in your heart ~ He’s in your soul
You’re Daddys Girl ~ now and forever…
Written on Father's Day 21st June 2020 for my granddaughter
IRENE ^~^ zzzzzzz...
Now my friend has a pussy called Irene
She is regal
She writes poetry
She is known as the Queen
Each day she eats salmon from a golden tureen
But one day last spring
A fat rat wandered in
Falling asleep on her golden tureen
And to her surprise whilst eating rat thighs
Irene found them deliciously lean
low fat ~ if you know what I mean...
No more salmon or caviar she's addicted to rat
But not Ratatouille for that is too chewy
Irene now eats a dish known as Rat-a-tat-tat
slowly cooked by my friend in a purple chef's hat...
12th February 2020
Ode to Irene ^~^ a most unusual cat...
Contest Strand Select N
Sponsor Brian Strand
FIRST PLACE
A restaurant on a beautiful island for kids
Remy from ratatouille is the chef of my restaurant
An expert in making boundless perfect blends
Cute kids can urge him anything they want
Seven dwarfs from snow white are the servers
Spider man and bat man will join them in occasions
They organise games to entertain the customers
I also hired some of the Disney princesses
Cindrella,Rapunzel,Snow white,Jasmine,
Aurora,Belle,Milan,Ariel and her sisters
Sing,dance and eat with the children.
Kids can also swing in Rapunzel's hair
Menu contains the healthy food of all nations
Since it is only for kids,I named it as Angels Inn
The best part is,I don't charge any fees
But I certainly need hugs and kisses
I was looking at some words and their meanings in the dictionary
Some of them are weird and extraordinary
Didgeridoo- Australian Aboriginal musical instrument that can play a tune or two
Ratatouille- Dish of stewed onions, courgettes, tomatoes, Aubergines and peppers, sounds chewy
Splendiferous- good, splendid, or even wonderfullerous
Zonk- tired, exhausted, tipsy, better stay of the plonk
Antidisestablishmentarianism- to object against the severing of links between the church and the state, if you can spell this correctly first time, then I think you are great
pneumonoultramiccroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis_ A dubious disease of the lung, I think you would be out of breath' if this was a lyric in a song
Aren't words wonderful, you can have a lot of funderful
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