Funny Mythology Poems | Examples
These Funny Mythology poems are examples of Mythology poems about Funny. These are the best examples of Mythology Funny poems written by international poets.
Three ladies all in lettuce dress
arrived to greet the crowd
their gowns were long and leafy green
with roughage all around
The gang had gathered angrily
to protest increased price
the market had just raised the cost
of everything but rice
They tried to quell the noisy bunch
of wholewheat, white and rye
but they had lost the crowd
to three tomatoes walking by
They called on Mr. Bacon
They thought maybe he’d assist
Bacon knew the owner
maybe he could raise his fist
What happened next was not at all
expected, as you see
the owner made a sandwich
that’s now known as B.L.T.
Santa Claus hired a dragon, Donnie Draco
to bring shy elves out of their cocoons;
he trains them to deliver the presents,
as meeting humans for them, is not pleasant.
Humans are huge and tower over elves,
and they would prefer just to sit on shelves.
Donnie's courage lends them strength;
don't worry, he keeps them at arm's length.
Donnie takes them around to stores,
to meet children, by the scores.
Sometimes a push or urging one needs,
to help a shy elf to proceed.
The kids just love to see old Donnie;
Santa thinks a Christmas Dragon's funny.
Well, really, truly yes, it is;
it lends a dimension to this seasonal biz.
And when these little elves are broken in,
Donnie goes home to visit with his kin;
high in the mountains of the North Pole,
in a cave called, "The Old Dragon Hole".
So if at Christmas, in a store you see,
a dragon the size of a Christmas tree
and tiny, shy elves that he is training,
do try not to end up fainting.
For Donnie's kind is a peaceful lot,
really though, if you think not,
just look inside yourself and see,
that deep with us all, a dragon be.
The goddess Appetitey,
a figure I have known
The mirror makes it all so clear
just look at how I’ve grown
Yes, Appetitey is a joy
when she comes around
With her songs in Menu form
resistance can’t found
She always seems to know
just what I love to eat
Burgers, tacos, fish and chips
and always something sweet
The goddess Appetitey
not really known to all
She’s the reason diet’s fail
why we drop the ball
Her sister of Greek myth
the one of lust and love
Banned her from the heavens
yet she is still above
So when you feel the urges
to stuff your face with pie
Just go and give the finger
right up to the sky
Pronunciation:
App-a-Ty-tee
Her lusty sister
Af-ra-Dy-tee
Pacha Mama
The name means Earth Mother
Today she is stylish and humorous
her big eyes show
endless love
emitting positive energy
which invigorates every second
The other day, she is just there
all around us
we also call it nature
being expressed in millions of ways;
fallen trees, worms under aged leaves, moving clouds, wolves howling, birds heading south
How do we express ourselves?
How do you express yourself?
How do I...?
Pacha Mama
Now close the curtain, The Night falls on us
Featherlite merry's lifted by breeze, float up to a plumeberry sky
then gracefully sail over Melody Vale and land on the Cheerbloom in Nyye
Below near hedgerows belinda's grow wild, in colourful patches of glay
and tipsee toe teasils with funny green caps, whistle a tune on their way
The elfins are gathering bright willo blues, to braid through their silky fine hair
and winged caterinas in pink flowing skirts, hold hands as they dance on the mairr
Well hidden from view, this faeryland realm, is a place that is far far away
where fair pixie toodles and Ippsee quin's dwell and happiness reigns every day
[for Joan Osborne]
What if god was a little mouse
Just a mouse in a little house
Just a stranger and a louse
Tryin' to get the cheese.
She left the tent in holy fervor,
Hell-bent to spread the Word.
The Spirit moved and made her quiver;
No act of faith was too absurd.
She knocked on doors, she spoke with zeal,
Her faith she shared in earnest.
There was no doubt God’s love is real:
His justice is the sternest.
I asked what other gods contend
For space inside her pretty head.
Might Yahweh, Allah or Shiva rend
The veil between gods ‘live and dead?
Do you beseech the Norse god Thor,
Once favored by the common folk?
The Son of Odin is heard no more.
What power broke that yoke?
For love there was an Aphrodite,
For war the Greek god Ares.
Athena’s wisdom eclipsed the mighty,
As Apollo‘s virtues the Virgin Mary‘s.
Though long I queried with due respect,
She unyielding kept her patience.
“On Jesus only I reflect;
To Him I owe allegiance.”
One god only fills her life -
It severs her from me.
I trust in reason, yet love my wife
With faith in one less god than she.
THERE'S NOWT ON OUR HERM
There's a naked heathen godlet
that lodges in our hall;
one leg of his is cocked up in the air.
Does that finger pointing upwards,
on which we hang the keys,
import some noble thought, some lofty theme?
If not, one asks, how should it be construed?
Maybe it's just another case
when all that can be said is.
'If it weren't for art,
you'd call the thing damn rude.'
Then he wears a warden's helmet,
except that it's got wings
and wings he's got a-flapping at the heel.
Considering aeronautics,
I doubt he'd pass the test,
but there's a thought that never bothers Herm.
He bears a funny wand
round which snakes entwine their coils
in a way that real snakes never seem to do.
Don't ask me why they're there,
or why he walks on air.
He's a god, yes, he's a god,
and there's an end.
Once a Leprechaun went swimming,
out in the deep blue sea.
Even though his head was spinning,
he thought it might appease.
He felt he needed exercise;
what’s better than a swim?
It’s healthy and fun, he surmised;
it beats a stuffy gym.
Without his trunks he felt so free;
waters warm from sunlight’s rays;
But in the distance, he could see;
his clothes blowing far away!
The lesson is simple; if you go swimming in the sea.
Have something on in case your clothes start riding on a breeze.
One day a dragon set out in flight;
Up towards New York, he did alight.
Landing in the middle of Times Square;
He quickly did become aware;
That some people he had scared;
Now his tail’s a tire tracked sight!
Yet another dragon, we had to get
And he just had to have a pet.
For whatever reason, he chose a frog;
So we took him to a bog.
He cared for that frog,
as if it were A beloved dog.
My Great Aunt Mae, visited and
for 12 days, she stayed.
She volunteered, to dinner cook,
But, dragon’s frog, she mistook;
She served his legs with some she’d bought;
Leaving dragon quite distraught.
Apologizing, she said she’d pay; so, we adopted him
a dog that day; dragon was quickly appeased.
Dragon
Snoring loud
Shook loose our walls
Rebuilding was costly
C-Pap!
Mi: Does God eat his boogers?
Eu: No of course God doesn't eat his boogers.
Mi: But I thought God could do anything.
Eu: Well he could eat his boogers but he just wouldn't.
Mi: So he does have boogers.
Eu: I don't know, I don't think God has boogers.
Mi: God can have anything he wants.
Eu: I don't think he wants boogers.
Mi: I don't think we can understand the mind of God.
Eu: We can't.
Mi: Maybe god is a booger.
Eu: God's not a booger.
Mi: But if God is all things, he's an all-knowing booger.
Eu: Stop it.
Mi: He's a wrathful all-knowing booger.
Eu: I'm not talking to you anymore.
Not the same races, but we can be one of a kind
Do you realized, when I see you, I lost my mind
Perseus, Perseus. Wherefore are we us?
My wild snakes needs to be tamed into a puss
You are my knight in a shining armor
I hope my hydra hair didn't create terror
Your eyes are petrifying me into a statue
Charming stranger, I give myself to you
Your chiseled jaw, rock hard and V-shaped torso
You leave me ecstatic as Euryale and stunned as Steno
Eros used the tip of your sword to pierce my heart
I can predict, our meeting will be celebrate as art
Poets will chant the day where we faced each other
Let's date, forget the sir-pants, so much to discover
You and me, riding a horse, flying in the sky
I can't feel the ground, with you I feel so high
I'm in your palm, I need your hand to hold me
Your baritone is my chorus, your love is my harmony
Just one kiss and my past hair would be back soon
Did you know about my anaconda tail during a full moon?
The Day Baklava Bent the Fork
By: Moji Agha
April 15, 2010
On this taxing day on Earth,
I finally saw with my own physical eyes,
in one hilariously sweet moment,
the sticky triumph of baklava over the fork.
The formerly cocky fork,
his erect ego bent,
finally learned what it means to be hard, or not.
The triumphant baklava, however,
wondered if age on a lonely shelf
hardens even the sweetest of the sweet.
I wonder:
Whether she also wondered, what it means to be tough
on this warming taxing day,
on this dying blue goblet: my Mother Earth?
Is my mother's sweet heavily taxed heart finally hardening?
Has she taken the fork in the road
that ends in hard, rather than sweet?
Or alas, was it that the soft-hearted fork
had no choice but to cry bent tears
mourning the death of softness
of sweet hearts?
I hear the wind of "what is" cry:
For whose out-of-balance baklavas and forks do the bells toll, especially today?