There was a thief, name of Lonnie Lumpkin
Accused of stealing a thousand pumpkins
He put them in trees
They stank in the breeze
Wud-ja expect from a Count-Tree Bumpkin
Categories:
lumpkin, halloween, silly, word play,
Form: Limerick
If only I had some teeth
Or hands of the human kind
Then there wouldn’t be a doubt
About apple pickin’ time
A mouth would be so handy
Never mind a pair of jaws
Sure, I’m great at holding candy
Yet, would like at least two paws
Bored of being a bumpkin
Walking with a little lumpkin
But until I am reborn
I’m a trick-or-treat pumpkin
If only I had some teeth
Or hands of the human kind
Then there wouldn’t be a doubt
About apple pickin’ time
I’d roll to a market stand
And fling out the bonbons
Then bite into a Cortland
Where heaven on earth is found
For Apple Pickin' Time contest
Categories:
lumpkin, fruit, seasons,
Form: Rhyme
Frothy exhaust curdles the Lumpkin
pumpkin
Hard Cider breath exudes from
every male bumpkin
Screamin kids Crab apples into
melted taffy dunkin
Uncle Leroy's flabby ass into
shredded bale sunken
Aunt Polly on the sagging porch
swing drunken
Cousin Marie on sawdust kitchen
floor corn husks shuckin
Baby Liza in corn pone crib goat's
milk from RC botttle suckin
One-eyed Grandpa Moses up at
Bear Cove spelunkin
Categories:
lumpkin, funny
Form: Light Verse