Long Waddles Poems

Long Waddles Poems. Below are the most popular long Waddles by PoetrySoup Members. You can search for long Waddles poems by poem length and keyword.


Premium Member She's Abusive and That's Conclusive

There was a fussy bovine named Flossy
who was snooty and always so bossy
her udders would droop
when she took a poop
She bellowed until her eyes got glossy

Flossy had teeth like a barracuda
Her biting habit just made her ruder
She's not very sharp
She spit when she'd harp
So I called a few friends and we shewed her

Then she threatened to have me arrested
Thought she'd beaten me and had me bested
Knocked her on her duff
She wasn't so tough
Alas, she kept right on and protested

I saw her on the street the other day
Her monstrous butt sat on a bale of hay
Stuck her tongue at me
Mooed, "Hello, ducky"
She trotted off when I aimed pepper spray

What a chunky hippo she has become
I think Flossy secretly sucks her thumb
Waddles when walking
Ranting and squawking
To senility, Flossy has succumb

Bovine creatures can be quite abusive
When they should be a closet reclusive
The more that they speak
The more that they reek
My findings are all justly conclusive
© Lin Lane  Create an image from this poem.
Form: Limerick


Premium Member Dinosaurs - For Children

The Land Before Time Spike and Ducky;
Not so lucky In The Land Before Time;
Littlefoot has a giant foot compared to us humans;
Humble Tyrannosaurus Rex, what a mess, dinosaurs-for children;
Reptar is everywhere ice-shows, cereals in everything and he's so fair;
How hysterical he gets about everything,
He's a loyal toy, dinosaur;
That always looks out for his friends 
Great works of the great lizard lord;
While being awesome in his own right, Reptar;
Dino is the best friend a caveman could have;
Always forever licking and knocking down Fred, dinosaurs-for children
Yippy, Yippy, Yippy, yap;
Loyal, affectionate, protective, and lovable ;
All necessary qualities for a pet dog dinosaur;
Especially we love the purple snorkasaurus, Gateway to Godzilla
The journey of Aladar the Iguanodon the displaced dinosaur;
Aladar finally settles down and with babies in Iguanodon honey;
Where’s the irony, T-Rex, Rex is your guy where his glory;
You’ll find him with others in a Toy Story, dinosaurs-for children
Despite how hysterical he gets, he’s a stand up sort of T-Rex;
Waddles back and forth, has a soothing voice monster tall stature…
All those dinosaurs for children gateway to Godzilla;


6/24/19

DINOSAUR(S) - FOR CHILDREN Poetry Contest
Sponsored by: Line Gauthier

Premium Member Jump Rope Time

Three friends are we, three friends from school.
Here in the barn there is no school rule.
No rules against talking. Not HERE Nope!
We talk all we want - swinging a rope.

We talk and we also giggle a lot.
That’s what girls do. Just like it or not!
It sure is nice here when it’s just we three -
Shellie, Marie and high-jumping me!

Hens nearby cackle, and I can spy
Shellie’s pet goose that now waddles by.
Rope jumping with my friends is such fun.
Twirl the rope fast before my turn’s done.

Marie is up next. She's eager, so
my last few twirls, my highest I go!

Sept. 28, 2021
For Eve Roper's Rhyme Me Rhyme Me A Poem Poetry Contest
Picture #1
fun
Form: Rhyme

Premium Member A Brutal Sport

Football is a brutal sport
   It's boxing without pads

Bone-jarring collisions rattle the head
   Collect too many, and you'll be dead

It also takes its toll on the knees
   Scar tissue, arthritis ~ Wheelchair, pretty please

Not to mention the damage it does to the spine
   Which becomes a human shock-absorber at game-time

Of course there are all those famous Chicago Bears players
      THOSE LEGENDARY 'MONSTERS OF THE MIDWAY:' 
'Coach' Mike Ditka waddles around on two dysfuntional hips
All-Star Dick Butkus' shattered knees plant curses on his lips  
      And the 'Punky Q-B,' Super Bowl winner, Jim McMahon
      Has helmet-bumped his way into the 'I'm-now-a-vegetable-can  
 Not to forget Dave Duerson: He entered Pro Football's Hall of Shame
   When he took his own life, 'cos he couldn't remember his name  

      But I'm a tough guy, a man's man, and here's what I say:
      If I have to sacrifice life or limb, let it not be for a football play
         ~ Let it be to defend my country, the USA!
Form: Rhyme

Premium Member When She Stole My Thong It Went Very Wrong - Bawdy

My auntie wears 'Bridget Jones' knickers
But last week at tea at the vicars
She’d purloined MY lace thong
It was morally wrong
T’was the cause of very loud snickers

My thong’s wedged between her butt crack
Stuck firmly between front and back
But it’s not a surprise
As it’s not in her size
There’s no room to cut any slack

Aunt waddles around like a duck
Like a chicken she begins to cluck
‘Yes I took her G-string
Get me out of this thing’
Stop gawping, help me get unstuck

The Vicar say’s I’ll get my pliers
On reflection it’s what this requires
The vicar doesn’t shirk
As he gets down to work
But after an hour he tires

My auntie’s visage is not pale
(Her embarrassment is off the scale)
When my G string gets cut
It pings clean off her butt
It’s a shame she’s the tush of a whale!

For a ‘sweet’ friend BB xx

07/22/21
Form: Limerick


Premium Member Bathroom Privileges

Here comes big Aunt Clara,
those arm pits really stink;
She uses all the paper,
leaves her dentures in the sink!

Wearing out her welcome,
attention's what she seeks;
For her to stay the night,
somehow becomes a week!

I can't go to the bathroom,
she's always locked inside;
Boy, I'm such a jerk,
when I'm forced to wait outside!

I wake up extra early,
a little bit after four;
I have the bathroom to myself,
that's what I thought before!

"Nephew",... Are you in there?"
"Auntie gotta go really bad"
I try my best to keep my cool,
by now I'm gettin' mad!

Ever since she lost our uncle,
she's always been alone;
I can sense her solemn grief,
but our bathroom's not her home!

Each time we have a visit,
our heads are held in shame;
She waddles into the bathroom,
and blows our poker game!

"FFLLLLLLLLLOOOOOOOPPPP!!"
oh, what a gruesome sound!
One by one, they ease away,
their smiles replaced with frowns!

One cold October evening,
the skies were dark and black;
Clara sat on the toilet,
and had a heart attack!

We called the paramedics,
five minutes already passed;
What we thought was a heart attack,
was nothing more than gas!

We started CPR,
compressions across the heart;
A poot was what we heard,
she unleashed a vicious fart!

Aunt Clara's alive and well,
she'll be seeing us all too soon;
Our latest plans for progress?
Build another bathroom!!
Form: Rhyme

Premium Member Quagmire

People loathe living in a filthy place.
Earth is a prone quagmire, for instance.
The legal maze hides some awful truth.
Painful to steer race and migrant sooth.

Ingenious ideas that people have evolved
Amid a verbal storm, feelings were dissolved.
Leaving a path of destruction in its wake.
There are countless dilemmas for its sake.

Moving forward in ways not intended to be!
They believe in someone who can foresee.
Confused over, how to stop the tragedy.
Panic crept throughout this desolate reality.

Implied temper versus stress and uneasiness. 
Ceding way too cruel stones lewd devious. 
Sunflowers incline and the streams slope. 
Posterity fills the circle of wandering scope.

Have you at any point seen a lotus-filled pool? 
Water dandles it, yet it is cautiously drool. 
Lotus waddles, swim, and sinks in water. 
Yet, water and lotus don't thud well together. 

No drop of water connected to this sprouting. 
Despite the birth in a mess and downpouring 
Lotus offers us a feeling of profound calm. 
Father, mother, kids act to the beat of a balm.

We should sustain progress toward nobility. 
Our capacity to stay away from vile dubiety. 
Be wary of voracity, connection, and power.
Avoid the node at all costs to empower.



Written: September 28, 2021

''Q'' Contest, NEW ONLY Poetry Contest
Sponsored by: Constance La France
© Sotto Poet  Create an image from this poem.
Form: Rhyme

Premium Member 4 Chickens: A Survival Story

It seemed to happen in a flash.
Our movements were rash.
Behind the breakfast bar
With scraps of potato hash.
Our webbed little feet
Stuck in a muddy mash.
Scores of us slip-slapping up the alley
Unabashed, with feathers
Mucked and thrashed
Finally on the road and--boom! Crash!
Linda was blindsided, 
Some trucker with a stash.
There were eight of us now
Headed for a small pond in Wabash.
Just 200 waddles in the razor tall leaves
That thrash and slash.
Finally the four of us left see
Beyond the man-sized vines
The immaculate vision of the chicken party.
The most bodacious aquatic bash:
The one they call "The Chicken Splash."
Form: Rhyme

The Lost Girl

The Lost Girl ... 
Through the eyes of a little girl she watches you and sheds a tear as she stares 
Her little fingers reaching out yearning for someone to care 
Her minute heart shaking beneath her undeveloped chest 
As she waddles down the streets of loneliness in her tattered forgotten vest
Dreaming of the times that her feet were warm 
She rubs her tiny knuckles against her blood shot eyes as her smile turns into scorn 

She flicks the gravel from the newly grazed skin on her broken knees
Her voice stolen in the ice cold chill of the world as her composure she fights to keep

I am the lost girl she whispers as she quivers trying desperately to breath 
Hopelessly searching for belonging as the wolves soundly sleeps 

Can you see me for who I truly am …..?Can you see the beauty of my scars?
Can you see me drowning …? Would you reach out and touch the girl going insane behind her own bars?
I am the lost girl …. Now a women in a broken world 
And I have watched my life slowly agonizingly out the window being hurled 

Through the eyes of the little girl I sit and stare 
Of all strangers I will always be perpetually aware
Form: Rhyme

Thong Thing Is Wrong

Thong Thing Is Wrong

Thong thing is wrong 
Cellulite women rolled on folds of flesh 
Over waves and seas that crest 
What are those monstrosities  
Whales washed up on beaches

Thin strings not quite bikinis hide nothing 
Obese creatures covered by mounds of pounds
Blot out the sun uncomfortably
As the fat eat Twinkies, dream of being Twiggy

Oh Doris please don't put on weight
Put on your tent.  Save us from nightmares in the day

Tides move when you step in the water 
Displace the natural order  
Fish run from you.  Forget how to swim
Naked can be scary by the sea                 
 
What is that giant thing standing in the sand
Dressed in almost nothing, held together by a string
What waddles down the shore
Thinking a black cloth makes one thin

Oh this fashion does not make for happy
Dreams and illusions bury the thighs in lies
Under the sun filling up horizons sky

Surprise!  Eyes bleed at this frightening sight
Makes old and young cry.  No place to hide

Ocean sojourns once were fun
Watching bikini clad women run
Nudity is meant for others more young
Eye candy, shapely, sexy and thin to begin with


Weight escaping on all sides exposed   
Pretending to be pretty and thin is quite the trick
Girls come in all shapes and sizes
Some have been known to raise the tides 
In disguise, hiding behind a smile exposes it
The thong thing is wrong
Please make it stop.  Make it quit

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