Thong Thing Is Wrong

Thong Thing Is Wrong Thong thing is wrong Cellulite women rolled on folds of flesh Over waves and seas that crest What are those monstrosities Whales washed up on beaches Thin strings not quite bikinis hide nothing Obese creatures covered by mounds of pounds Blot out the sun uncomfortably As the fat eat Twinkies, dream of being Twiggy Oh Doris please don't put on weight Put on your tent. Save us from nightmares in the day Tides move when you step in the water Displace the natural order Fish run from you. Forget how to swim Naked can be scary by the sea What is that giant thing standing in the sand Dressed in almost nothing, held together by a string What waddles down the shore Thinking a black cloth makes one thin Oh this fashion does not make for happy Dreams and illusions bury the thighs in lies Under the sun filling up horizons sky Surprise! Eyes bleed at this frightening sight Makes old and young cry. No place to hide Ocean sojourns once were fun Watching bikini clad women run Nudity is meant for others more young Eye candy, shapely, sexy and thin to begin with Weight escaping on all sides exposed Pretending to be pretty and thin is quite the trick Girls come in all shapes and sizes Some have been known to raise the tides In disguise, hiding behind a smile exposes it The thong thing is wrong Please make it stop. Make it quit