Long Slobbering Poems

Can I go to the bathroom? This place is full of jackasses. This place is full of jackasses jerking each other off. This place is full of ignorant, parochial, zit-sucking jackasses undeserving of their place...

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I wanna trade in my stubby spindleshanks...,

(a poor excuse for legs),
and get me the latest
sophisticated prosthetics advancements,
whereat integration of cultured stem cells
into custom made appendages
allows, enables, and provides
unfortunate recipients of amputations
to experience sensations.

No more will...

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Rugby SCRUM* DANCE for Divorced and Dis-abused Wedding Guests

(Packs made up of eight « players » (see note below) may be formed indifferently : either segregate the sexes or mix them up. No sweat !...

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It’s Monday afternoon, the first day after Fall Break. Several of my suitemates are here, relaxing a bit before we hit the dining hall and then scatter, like debris from a bomb. There are a...

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`

I opened the rusted iron gateway
bound in chain and wire, to find a landing
caked in muddied footprints, scattered about like roaches
Magpie shadows course the rain soaked streets
and puddle patterns reflect temptation as light flickers
from second...

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So we took Bonnie the Border Collie to the vet yesterday for a wellness check and to update his shots. While there we discussed Bonnies dominance issues over Crusher the female Doberman, especially when he...

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Imagine a world where only you and I exist 
and only you and I matter. 

No boundaries ,
no limits, no
consequences...Only you and I free.

Free to behave as we feel
free to express our undeniable love
for one...

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Sassy sobriquets schooled sissy spindleshanks...
studious sexagenarian skinny scruffy scribe

My utmost humblest apology
for inducing the following
cerebral calisthenics upon your cranium,
but the cost of friendship
with yours truly 
(me – a foo fighting,
eagle eyed, beatle browed, beastie boy...

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There was pity for one second for the victim in this case,
when 'Hilly', 'Bee' and me were walking to our drinking place.
We were slobbering in thought for what keeps us all afloat, 
then 'Hilly's' eyes...

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Lascivious Friends Amends

Coincidence, simultaneity, with a pinch of merriment
And convergence of moments, opened up this gate to hell 
(I had to open the door…didn't I ?…)
It was at their convenience, not mine
Cursed by fate, unwanted...

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Sassy sobriquets schooled sissy spindleshanks...
studious skinny scruffy scribe

Scathing, scolding, screaming,
scorning, searing, sing,
sociopathic sarin soaked skewed
squirt, sputtering, squawking, sleepily
staggering, stabbing, swaggering
sweltering sadistic, sarcastic,

savage, systemically systematically
stigmatized, supersized saber sharp
schick shaving, shunned, sabotaged,
scarred, scorched, smote, sanguine,
stippled, speckled schizophrenic
sensibility,...

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twasn’t an absence of belief in
hexes or voodoo shit, black magic,
witches or warlocks,
which brought to mind the maddening
of the crickets, for
900 species of those sinister gryllidae 
couldn’t be wrong &
they came anyway---
chirping their nocturnal nonsense...

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And I witness
Your deplorable “glory”
Hunching over my tattered spine,
So we can have something in common

You walk with glorified shell-shock,
Another sentient tongue, 
Straddling on the Eros of vindication

Your sandpaper hands
Reach for an assaulted tenderness
Embracing lambasted lyric

Another...

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We gathered for our thirtieth class reunion at Lydia's Smorgasbord.
I'd avoided such past events since in school I was largely ignored!
But my spouse proclaimed we would attend, thus ending that debate!
The dreaded encounter is expressed...

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A funny thing happened on the way to the Red Barn
I opened the door and out Kia flew out, 
Jumping over a stair or two
Clearing the porch, there was dew on the grass
Kia sliding along...

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Evil broiled him changing his thoughts, and he perceived not
The slow desiccation of his mind, how his brain infected rot
From the poison of pride! More and more putrid he became
Despising his brother for doing good,...

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Recently I’ve been thinking about that 8 foot 
plot of land outside of Heathers that my parents
buried my grandfather in. It’s amazing how many
tulips and roses can fit in an 8 foot plot of land.
At...

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Some ride coffins
Black and slick
Completely round
The best of linen interior
For when your inbound
Four feet laid under the ground.

Some swim in tears
Blue tinted, salty, and clear
Drowning their cheers
Pain always living in it
Public with their lament
Swollen eyes...

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Doggone Cat 


Domestication’s dormancy- be damned
I’d choose to go outside – not in this sand

I will pass on love and hugs for I am certain
destiny demands I climb the curtain

He lies there floppy eared –...

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scary sandy & the good lil’ believers 

there are idiots who get 
excited when they hear that a 
storm is approaching,
they smile & secretly wish for
the end---
in the past few days
when hurricane Sandy has been
ripping...

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Dictionary describes the word “dactylion”
As the tip of your middle finger
So if someone gives you the dactylion
They're giving you a zinger!

Have you ever been subjected to “gargalesis”
It's described as heavy tickling
Love being gargalesis in certain...

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From across the dark veiled hills ,
A howl of anguish fills the soul with chills,
We hear it coming amidst the shadows,
And smell its malelovant purpose distinctly.
Ever closer it creeps and snarls,
Foul breath filling senses and...

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I marched, they marched, we marched
For nothing now it seemed
And I the ego pulpiteer, left parched
Refusing to go underground with the stream
That carried me before to a sheer
Desolate drop, I can struggle unless I fear.

So...

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How do you fence out a song, should have made
My heart sound proof against the burglar's voice
Or set my slobbering soul in airtight steel barricade
How do stop the catlike notes from climbing joyce
And beam, or...

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MIDDLE EARTH


I see the gaping maw approaching
ivory white saliva covered teeth
slobbering over red gums
tongue lolling about
reaching for my face.

Knees!!  Dammit!!!  Knees!!
God are there some ugly knees
rippled, dimpled, dumpling shaped
sticking through the holes in...

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