Long Poop out Poems
Long Poop out Poems. Below are the most popular long Poop out by PoetrySoup Members. You can search for long Poop out poems by poem length and keyword.
Put your hands up those who want more sillies
Counted six thousand, one hundred and forty
Seems like a bunch of you still like to giggle
Be assured, more's coming up shortly
First one, how does one make holy water?
That's easy, you boil the hell out of it
That's really quite funny and extremely clever
A copyright I've got in my mitts
They say nobody's perfect, well I'm a nobody
So it follows I must be perfect
If four out of five suffer from diarrhea
Must mean one person enjoys it's effects
A computer once actually beat me at chess
But it's no match for me at kick boxing
Beat the poop out of that annoying computer
Other laptops thought it was shocking
I say no to alcohol, but it just doesn't listen
That's the silliest thing I've ever heard
Whenever I talk quietly to a Bloody Caesar
It answers, “you are totally absurd!”
Whad'ya call a boomerang that won't come back
I guess I'd just call it a stick
What do you give a woman who has it all
Your phone number of course, Mr. Slick
Have you ever seen a grizzly... bare?
And told him to put on some clothes
I did that once, but it must have upset him
Because he reared back on his toes
Well this guy's no freaking big hero
So I started to take off like a shot
But before I could, he grabs me and says
“I'm your friend... like it or not!”
Mr. Grizzly must surely have noticed
Sweat pouring down from my brow
He started to laugh like big bears do
Scared the poop out of me... holy cow!
As he held me, I calmed down a little
He seemed like a right friendly chap
But those teeth of his were really sharp
He was drooling from his cavernous yap
But he really seemed like a kindly old soul
Neither nasty, nor scary, nor mean
I asked if he'd like to come home for honey
But insisted he put on some jeans
The reason is because of my kiddies
Not nice to go showing your parts
It's just a matter of common decency
Wanted to get that straight from the start
So off we go, Mr. Grizzly and me
I'm feeling warm and fuzzy all over
Another new friend to share some laughs
Along with my old dog Rover
© Jack Ellison 2014
Been diagnosed with start of glaucoma
It certainly was to be expected
Members of my family have also suffered
So why wouldn't I be affected
As most families go, so go its members
Very few of us miss this inheritance
Scads of money would be much more welcome
But we're all a slave to happenstance
Hopefully it's progress is really slow moving
And I'm good for a while yet to come
Not keen on anything to do with the eyeballs
Feel squeamish and come all undone
Maybe I'll be spared and catch a good break
I won't need to go under the knife
That word knife always scares the poop out of me
The most disturbing word of my life
“Okay Jack, you're sissy side is showing
Remember you're a male, stand up tall!”
Male, schmale, I cringe at the image
Of a doctor scraping my eyeballs
© Jack Ellison 2013
A BUNCH OF “WHY'S”
Could you tell me why most hippopotami
Weigh about the same as a truck
In the animal kingdom diets aren't common
So they're really poop out of luck
A donkey with wings or an ass that sings
Quite an image I have in my mind
Some like listening to a cockatoo warble
But I think that's quite asinine
Now why do most newborns poop at will
They emerge without any manners
Farting in front of friends and neighbours
Sure makes you stutter and stammer
When misplacing an important document
You find it in the last place you look
Why not look there in the first place I wonder
You'll be stunned at the short time it took
Admit I ain't perfect but who the hell is
Sometimes I dribble in my beard
Imagine it sounds quite disgusting to you guys
A snack for when bedtime is near
Why do we cringe at the sound of one's nails
Screeching across a blackboard
Sends chills up and down our li'l ole spines
Can feel 'em right now, oh Lord!
Put your hands up those who want more sillies
Counted six thousand, one hundred and forty
Seems like a bunch of you still like to giggle
Be assured, more's coming up shortly
First one, how does one make holy water?
That's easy, you boil the hell out of it
That's really quite funny and extremely clever
A copyright I've got in my mitts
They say nobody is perfect, well I'm a nobody
So it follows I must be perfect
If four out of five suffer from diarrhea
Must mean one person enjoys it's effects
A computer once actually beat me at chess
But it's no match for me at kick boxing
Beat the poop out of that annoying computer
Other laptops thought it was shocking
I say no to alcohol, but it just doesn't listen
That's the silliest thing I've ever heard
Whenever I talk quietly to my Bloody Caesar
It answers, “you are totally absurd!”
Whad'ya call a boomerang that won't come back
I guess I'd just call it a stick
What do you give a woman who has it all
Your phone number of course, Mr. Slick
Could you tell me why most hippopotami
Weigh about the same as a truck
In the animal kingdom diets aren't common
So they're really poop out of luck
A donkey with wings or an ass that sings
Quite an image I have in my mind
Some like listening to a cockatoo warble
But I think that's quite asinine
Now why do most newborns poop at will
They emerge without any manners
Farting in front of friends and neighbours
Makes you stutter and stammer
When misplacing an important document
You find it in the last place you look
Why not look there in the first place I wonder
You'll be stunned at the short time it took
Admit I ain't perfect but who the hell is
Sometimes I dribble in my beard
Imagine it sounds quite disgusting to you guys
A snack for when bedtime is near
Why do we cringe at the sound of one's nails
Screeching across a blackboard
Sends chills up and down our li'l ole spine
Can feel 'em right now, oh Lord!
© Jack Ellison 2013
Have you ever seen a grizzly... bare?
And told him to put on some clothes
I did that once, but it must have upset him
Because he reared back on his toes
Well this guy's no freaking big hero
So I started to take off like a shot
But before I could, he grabs me and says
“I'm your friend... like it or not!”
Mr. Grizzly must surely have noticed
Sweat pouring down from my brow
He started to laugh like big bears do
Scared the poop out of me... holy cow!
As he held me, I calmed down a little
He seemed like a right friendly chap
But those teeth of his were really big
He was drooling from his cavernous yap
All in all, seemed like a kindly old soul
Neither nasty, nor scary, nor mean
I asked if he'd like to come home for honey
But I insisted he wear some jeans
The reason is because of the wee kiddies
Not nice to go showing your parts
It's just a matter of common decency
Wanted to get that straight from the start
So off we go, Mr. Grizzly and me
I'm feeling warm and fuzzy all over
Another new friend to share some laughs
Along with my old dog Rover
©Jack Ellison 2012
Could you tell me why most hippopotami
Weigh about as much as a truck
In the animal kingdom diets aren't common
So they're really poop out of luck
A donkey with wings or an ass that sings
Quite an image I have in my mind
Some like listening to a cockatoo warble
But I think that's quite asinine
Now why do most newborns poop at will
They emerge without any manners
Farting in front of friends and neighbours
Sure makes you stutter and stammer
When misplacing an important document
You find it in the last place you look
Why not look there in the first place I wonder
You'll be stunned at the short time it took
Admit I ain't perfect but who the hell is
Sometimes I dribble in my beard
Imagine it sounds quite disgusting to you guys
A snack for when bedtime is near
Why do we cringe at the sound of one's nails
Screeching across a blackboard
Sends chills up and down our li'l ole spines
Can feel 'em right now, oh Lord!
Could you tell me why most hippopotami
Weigh about as much as a truck
In the animal kingdom diets are not common
So they're really poop out of luck
A donkey with wings or an ass that sings
Quite an image I have in my mind
Some like listening to a cockatoo warble
But I think that's quite assinine
Now why do most newborns poop at will
They emerge without manners
Farting in front of friends and neighbours
Sure makes you stutter and stammer
When misplacing an important document
You find it in the last place you look
Why not look there in the first place I wonder
You'll be stunned at the short time it took
Admit I ain't perfect but who the hell is
Sometimes I dribble in my beard
Imagine it sounds quite disgusting to you guys
A snack for when bedtime is near
Why do we cringe at the sound of one's nails
Screeching across a blackboard
Sends chills up and down our li'l ole spines
Can feel 'em right now, oh Lord!
Put your hands up those who want more sillies
Counted six thousand, one hundred and forty
Seems like a bunch of you still like to giggle
Be assured, more's coming up shortly
First one, how does one make holy water?
That's easy, you boil the hell out of it
That's really quite funny and extremely clever
A copyright I've got in my mitts
They say nobody is perfect, well I'm a nobody
So it follows I must be perfect
If four out of five suffer from diarrhea
Must mean one person enjoys it's effects
A computer once actually beat me at chess
But it's no match for me at kick boxing
Beat the poop out of that annoying computer
Other laptops thought it was shocking
I say no to alcohol, but it just doesn't listen
That's the silliest thing I've ever heard
Whenever I talk quietly to my Bloody Caesar
It answers, “you are totally absurd!”
Whad'ya call a boomerang that won't come back
I guess I'd just call it a stick
What do you give a woman who has it all
Your phone number of course, Mr. Slick
© Jack Ellison 2015