Long Poetaster Poems

Inextricably rooted with hair fixation

As a lad in grade school,
yours truly, (a diminutive, intuitive,
oversensitive, and vegetative potato head kid,
whose voice exhibited
a severe nasal twang)
felt envious at other boys,
especially those young bucks
who sported budding antlers
plus thick...

Read More

Non labor (relations) day September 1st, 2023 poem

Aye dream of Genie (as a lad din)
Schwenksville, Pennsylvania -
keystone state abbreviated as Pea Yay,
this stupid non huge poem
deployed courtesy scholar
really...a boot nuttin
butta an overrated allay
zee good for...

Read More

Aha - argh... oh my dog...
don't mind me muttering, eh?

Earlier today (May 5th, 2020),
I forget thee exact hour
found me utterly beside mice elf,
matter of fact even at this moment,
yours truly doth feel mad at himself
cuz...

Read More

Television triptych throwback

and despite remote chance 
to channel small medium at large
metamorphosis I may witness 
analogous to caterpillar
will transform me into a butterfly
otherwise Norwegian bachelor (batch chiller)
farmer will simply plow along
taking a stab writing "FAKE"...

Read More

after dark April 26th, 2022

Prometheus bound out the heavens
to strike fear in the hearts of men and women
reminding us mortals how like oxen yoked
(together via a wooden beam forced
to undergo strenuous labor)
unlike most elderly residents...

Read More

Poems for Poets VI



Caveat
by Michael R. Burch

If only we were not so eloquent,
we might sing, and only sing, not to impress,
but only to enjoy, to be enjoyed.

We might inundate the earth with thankfulness
for light, although...

Read More

(alternately titled no particular reason:
bring unto “fake” trumpeting Caesar
seven salad dressings from deep freezer
and lettuce deign at your plea azure.)

Graced with boyish good looks,
innocence and naiveté to boot,
an especial loathing toward me
chicken legs re: spindleshanks

(which...

Read More

(alternately titled: impossible mission goes awry
probably mortal enemy cast spell binding jinx)

Both mental versus
physical tasks necessitate
laser sharp attentiveness
triggered within blinks
similarly on par when people toast
momentary instance utter silence

before more'n one
wine glass simultaneously clinks
cheering hurray, especially
if...

Read More

Stranded in bittercold without food or drink...

Though the following
twittering scenario quite absurd,
methought diehard adherents of mine
(intimation also quite far-fetched),
some unnamed readers insomnia
nevertheless could benefit courtesy 
a thought provoking tweet
east of Eden heard.

Dire straits necessitated
yours truly...

Read More

Whar art mine fervent zeal for Marx Brothers?

While figuratively trout fishing
for ideas to write about
analogous (hook, line and sinker)
idea wormed itself into mind with clout
moment of awareness arose
without shadow of doubt.

As a long haired pencil...

Read More

Misery accompanied, haltered, tethered... tattered web

This health conscious lx year
roam'n, hoodwinking hoodlum doth wear
two pair bullet proof underwear,
(which confession rarely trumpeted),
plus yours truly admits unclear
why tibia long in the tooth fellow,

prevaricates with tongue in cheek...

Read More

Ah... how envious, those young, restless, and fecund...

Lucky young guys and gals
admission courtesy yours
truly finds small (medium)
poetaster at large rubicund
perhaps anonymous reader

lollygagging (cyber space)
while away leisure stunned
boot why such shock despite
old & decrepit peppy gunned
no...

Read More

Damn anticipatory anxiety affliction...
trumps volition (mine) to don employee hat!

Until the grim reaper
whisks yours truly away
common joe just biden his time
chronologically old fogey
(albeit boyish looking goodfella)
at moon shadows he doth bay

meanwhile stricken with
dripping wet sweaty...

Read More

Yours truly never heard, seen, no lies
particularly when alone
facing my (pushing up daisies) demise,
without pretense nor guise,
he honestly decries
smelled, tasted, nor touched, any size,

and essentially knew nothing besides
ancient fruit grown in Japan
for past 1,000 years...

Read More

Das papa anathema & furor he hiss toward patriarchal hierarchy

Courtesy mine eldest sister Amelie
Beth (thirteen plus months my senior),
whose maternal love equals heart as emoji,
she nsync with other kith and kin
painstakingly fleshed out family tree,
formerly...

Read More

Non-bachelor (batch chiller)
"FAKE" horror thriller
available Netflix starring
ghost of Phyllis Diller
stand up comedienne killer
brought down haunted house
witch sea hunt accompanied

theme song referencing Argonaut tiller
Greenwich Village location Barney Miller
lite precinct brewed fare of corpse
unearthed dead comedy duo...

Read More

Stranded courtesy bittercold without food or drink

Dire straits necessitated
yours truly to bethink
outside the box (literally outdoors
of squarish structured nested dwelling),
where blinding albedo effect
forced me to blink,
additionally also ruffled tail feathers

of this sole surviving male bobolink
(North...

Read More

Warning!
Suitable for Only Children
 
"The satirist Menippean ad hominems attacks,
not pri*ks or any ret*rd making such who Reason lacks."
-- a Menippean satirist-poet who loathes the false ideology,
not the mor*nic motherfu*ker mouthing it
 
*  ...

Read More

Still reeling (albeit figuratively) after amidst realization...
keys to apartment and 2009 Hyundai Sonata went missing

Yesterday August tenth year
two thousand and twenty one,
I experienced blitzkrieg of explosive panic
shattering an ordinarily calm veneer
me (a doubting Thomas) resorting...

Read More

Resolution To...Too... Tooth... Thou..
(house sand zero, and own nine)

Wine hot ja... jes... justa bead devout
boo... boos...booze hound 'n
frog git (hic cup) bout...
new yea ears rez: hill loo... dang

(burp) louche huns, eh an...,
and beg... agh hen...

Read More

Regarding yours truly
he experienced setback
amplified by Luddite propensity
nostalgic longing for simpler age
bring back horse and buggy
better yet find me a mancave
and/or apprise me
ideally via email
Flintstone web page modality

allowing, enabling, and providing
excellent linkedin access
whereby augmented
and/or augmented...

Read More

Like A Fire Cat - Teaser Taste Of Spring...
Did Fistbump With Ole Man Winter

Once again, this fella alights
this poetaster and trots out weather,
nope not cuz freezing cold bites,
this poetic instance highlights
spate of unseasonably warm temperatures

circa...

Read More

(buzzfeeding, kickstarting, needling darn noggin)

An effort to recall word, phrase,
musician... indigenous tribe...
most frustrating literary
endeavor to das scribe

aggravating enough to sub
bourbon spur teetotaler to imbibe
and/or nsync, whereby soul searching
devil's advocate demands bribe.

Lil brokeback Engelbert Humperdinck
(born Arnold...

Read More

After most recent shower,
and particularly washing hair
(then shaking head
analogous to sopping wet dog
drying her/himself after a bath),
I immediately said helloo
to Long lasting fragrance Suave
essentials Daily Clarifying
Deep cleansing Shampoo,
which permeated mine scalp
facilitating healthy follicles.

More so frothy...

Read More

Rudder than trigger, provoke,
incite..., voodoo curse
necessitating emergency visit
courtesy doctor Demento or his nurse
methought best to craft (airily)
nonsense sickle verse
yikes! maybe iamb 
steadily getting worse

as poetaster wannabe,
which prognosis bodes ill
and p'raps best coon sitter
underwater basket weaving
enlist...

Read More