Long Herbaceous Poems
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Detailing delicate defecation debacle
Otherwise wordily titled: pooped out
after pouring bucketfuls of water into
place of ablutions
all the while skipping to my loo
umpteen times courtesy bathtub faucet
turned toward hot temperature
so toilet would finally,
magnificently, and royally flush.
As ofttimes occurred in the past
anonymous reader's time
I once again promise to waste
concerning asinine verbiage
without this bard **** feeling shamefaced
broadcasting his fealty
to posterior predilections must appear
(as rearing to volley rebuttal
against fans of mine) yours truly
ofttimes discusses that byproduct,
which issues out buttucks) narrow-based
if not downright banal, gross, offal... in haste
to craft something more philosophical
how craven potty talk
whereby theme doth self debase.
I excreted a bowel movement
moments ago today April 11th, 2024
at approximately two thirty post meridian
substantial enough to sink battleship
(maybe ye experienced tsunami after effects)
laboriously dumping bucketfuls of hot water
insync with applying plunger found me a drip
with perspiration, and would have possibly found
site manager and/or maintenance man to flip
(a rare sight to behold
worth inconvenience of clogged toilet bowl),
which yours truly felt strain in back muscles
as he poured bucketfuls of water from his hip
accidentally splashing water
on bathroom floor
yes your honor
(necessitating poop deck to evacuate)
if thee choose to sit in judgeship
but please be mindful
to restrain giving me any lip
cuz atypical dilemma I figuratively did nip
in the bud, yet foresee similar outcome
sure as this...
once upon a sage, rosemary and parsnip
herbaceous generic fellow sought readership
ideally landing webbed wide world trip
heralded all along as a V.I.P.,
where fanfare for this common man
enjoying Appalachian Spring,
would find his doggerel
induced listeners to yip.
The smallest of seeds falls and amalgamates with the earth.
Amidst dust to dust, mist, manure, and moisture gain rebirth.
Leaf evolution, stem elongation, and florescence
With sun-lit yellow blooms, it reaches its adolescence.
Like a vulture, it spreads its wings of bold bushy branches.
Towards giving rest to birds of all kinds, it advances.
From a wheatish tone, the colour of seeds slowly turns brown.
Into globular black painite granule finds its renown.
All these were hidden within these as a seed when it fell.
As a seed yielding shrub, it has many tales to tell.
Adding taste to the food and serving as herbs to good health
Is not a mustard seed a gem of herbaceous wealth?
Divine kingdom, though humble in stature, is marvellous.
To seek this, yet, you asked them, shouldn't each one be righteous?
Daiya vegan non dairy cheesecake - oh yum!
Hard knocks Methacton school alum
ofttimes finds ruing his fate
while squarely planted on me bum
disheveled and unshaven,
whereby gray stubble encrusted
with wayward synonymous days old crumb -
after wolfing delectable entitled treat
buttered fingers drubbing upon tabletop
analogous to playing a drum
oy vey, yours truly cannot believe
he ate the whole thing -
argh... my poor tum.
ALDI GIANT supermarkets
(within small radius of miles
from me Schwenksville, Penna abode)
sell delicious delectable treat
goading, inspiring, and spurring me
to craft poem essentially
patronizing manufacturer,
whose skilled food technicians
engineered absolute winning dessert
courtesy their natural born talent
schooled (most likely at culinary institute)
possibly supplemented insync
with advanced degrees
at other institutions of higher learning
after various and sundry
trials and error
concocting mouthwatering secret recipe.
Lemme use hypothetical situation
to accent chew ate,
how alluded dessert tastes great,
especially when rumble in tumbly
clamors for glorious goody
regarding appetite to satiate
unfortunately circumstances
force your truly to wait.
If (the following
constitutes far fetched scenario)
stranded on a desert island,
I after falling to Earth
when parachute fails to open,
weighed down by an excess of
Daiya vegan non dairy cheesecakes,
would finagle an empty pie tin
to signal an SOS.
If left to my own devices,
(where you dear reader
would discover one humbug),
I would be forced to scrounge around
rubbing two sticks together
to create warmth
plus distilling oils -
derived from edible herbaceous plants,
whence I would ejaculate
(not prematurely) - olé
to sauté said greens with wild mushrooms.
Blackbrush -- Coleogyne ramosissima
the dominant understory shrub
in the pinyon-juniper canyons.
Mountain-mahogany -- Cercocarpus montanus and ledifolia.
Single-leaf ash -- Fraxinus anomalus
and possibly a western hophornbeam
by the small birch-like leaves
and the shredding bark
in a moist stretch of joint trail.
The joint-fir, green ephedra
looks like an ocean plant.
Could the wind or white water rivers alone
have shaped these sandstone, red rock forms?
Network of canyons, inverse of mountains.
It had to be ocean
ebbing and flowing, emotionally, like wind,
moving atmosphere, thicker
shaving, scraping, polishing, gouging, digging
fish canyons
then, shallower, dinosaur swamps
now, dry, rock gardens.
Explain the human history with water:
did the Anasazi visit neighbors
along the canyon rims and deep within,
combination caves and red-rock houses
small windows, doorways, just crawlways,
with corn gifts on summer evenings
when the canyon bottoms held permanent, not intermittent,
streams? After them
came the Ute and Navajo, Spanish and English.
Ravens dine on road kill.
A few long red roads connect some canyons.
The unprotected flats are overgrazed, rabbitbrush.
It is interesting
that as I learn the woody and herbaceous plants,
walk the desert foothills, I too could stay.
Ott's (lots) chrysanthemums in bloom
pitch perfect today
September 14th, 2022.
861 Gravel Pike, Schwenksville,
Pennsylvania 19473
the ideal place
if/when ye dear reader
experience maddening rage
(against the machine)
causing ordinarily calm demeanor
to fuss and fume
perhaps as best man/woman
unbridled quibble between
newly minted bride or groom
(similar scenario between yours truly
and the thirty something gal he married)
both of us barely
able, eager, ready, and willing
to resolve conflict,
(short of getting a divorce),
where nuptial contention didst loom
now... courtesy cap donned with a plume,
and after more'n a quarter century
united in holy moly matrimony.
Highland Manor Apartments
affords quick jaunt
veritable exotic getaway
scant miles away
Schwenksville establishment rooted
at least last half century
local tropical paradise beckons
passer(s) by to saunter
imbibe fragrant aroma,
espy splash of color on hillside
ease hilly draw painter with palette
photographer, musician, writer...
especially during dead of winter,
indoor botanical garden
bounteous, capacious, herbaceous...
topography exquisitely, heavenly,
incredibly... landscaped flora
to dazzle sense and sensibility,
inebriating, intoxicating, invigorating...
metaphorical cathartic ambrosia,
potent fragrant blend
wafting within englassed green acres
buzzfeeding, kickstarting, spellbinding
pollinating, germinating, birthing...
analogous natural stimulant,
holistic, magically therapeutic
without deleterious hallucinogenic,
nor harmful narcotic qualities,
also terrific soporific,
a soothing environment
to gravitate, meditate, ruminate...
healthy psychological restorative
hypothetical scenario to heal
mental, physical, and spiritual wounds
to strengthen body,
mind, and body triage
woke benumbed atavistic
primitive *****sapiens
nihilistic grim outlook (mine)
housing grim prognostication
foreboding bleak aggrievement
impossible submission toward
apocalyptic trend to escape.
~~
In an old fashioned garden behind a stone wall
Hollyhocks and sunflowers growing so tall
Red rambling roses drape over a fence
Old fashioned flowers with colours intense.
Lupins and larkspur in lilac display
Buddleia blooming where butterflies play
Surrounding moonflower whose petals unfold
A bright splash of starburst, marsh marigold
Herbaceous borders, rosemary and rue
Columbines and clover full damp with the dew
Scents long forgotten their perfumes endow
I loved them long ago, I love them now
These old fashioned flowers, I planted them all,
In an old fashioned garden behind a stone wall
~~
Once upon a time, not so long ago.
If only you knew, my spirit reflected
The greenery of nature and It's cooling
On that balmy day. You carefully laid me
Down beneath spilled cerulean and crimson sky
And moving clouds; a fervent morning sunlight
Sheltered under rustling, verdant umbrella
Of trees. On a sparse, herbaceous aroma,
Bed of grass. You cupped my head in your hand,
A small kiss you had laid on my forehead;
When we were together, you and I.
The comforting love of affection.
A perfect moment whilst the world breathed
And the clouds gathered to quench the storm.
A serenity I would love to see return,
But those fluttering autumnal color leaves
And spill crimson sky; also mourn for you and me.
10/23/2020
Battle Of Most Acclaimed 2020 Poems Poetry Contest
Sponsored by: John Hamilton
Imperfect world, purposeless person.
I retired to pursue perfection
learn jazz tunes, woody and herbaceous plants,
read every inch of English literature,
Scientific American and Foreign Affairs,
have an affair with an American.
Oh, and by the way, before you ask, I'm from Mars.
Orbiting your planet, admiring the girls.
Paraphrasing prayers by George Herbert to share
with Jesus believers on talk radio shows
where we try to bring your lives into expressible states
before it’s too late and climate change inundates you.
Reversed thunder, savior-side-piercing spear,
one day you’re feeling fine, the next not.
We’re pretty matter of fact, clear about
the fact of death. Once you’re gone most of us forget
your face and previous accomplishments. The place
you lived is repopulated with the next generation (of aliens)
and that ought to be a comfort, a sort of restful
certainty all is well, nothing special need be done.
Bluebirds are back, crows are mating on the sky
and chasing hawks away from their nests. Juncos
and sparrows glean together. I hear pileated woodpeckers
jackhammering and barred owls hooting soothingly.
Herons smoothing feathers and spearing fish.
Everything is as one would wish.
Numberless are the world's wonders
but none more wonderful than aliens.
Mystery Seeds
Uninvited to my garden party -
Skepticism abounds
At faces hidden by woody capes
Maybe innocence masked in suspicion
Absent an invitation – party crashers
Of unknown origin
And unknown certification;
Weed or wildflower –
Herb or herbaceous horror –
Maybe alien blooms born on a meteor
No toasts of welcome in dewy nectar
By garden residents -
Only side winding glances
Born of dubious -
Unwelcomed arrivals
With no return address
Arouse qualms growing like rosebush suckers
No RSVP for surprise attendees
Asking admittance
When curiosity stands up waving
Told “Sit down!”
While walking to the trash.
I missed the Mystery Seeds contest by a couple of minutes! Just wanted to share the results from this fun contest theme.
You are like the peacock on the top of Radisson blue sky
The red eyes and blue heart of you dig out my sense of desire
Envy there is hidden to gasp all and lust flourishes the eroticism
The Opal is entangled with your seductive passionate body
And the Tourmaline comes to relieve unglued stress
All the colorful lustrous increases alertness with the immune system
The perennial herbaceous plant calendula nourishes skin,
Revives that as the youthful shining more than divine whore
On the exhausting sick chest of your autumnal earth, Diwali comes
Durga will come by the cradle and go by the elephant for your curing
She will embrace you thru tender breeze and cleanse in drizzling
On the dynamic ways of words, I am clogged, speechless wayfarer
The greatest soul of the mystical Ektara left us 130 years ago
and went to the supreme being keeping us on the shoreless ocean
I am onto the paths of the mask, global Halloween festivals of you
To rejoice the days of science, chemistry, and space with pasta lovers
I am in your time of inviting natural coolness touching white fogs,
In your time of inviting winter and planting the seed of spring
The poetic mind roaming in your vineyard walls with the syrup of grapes
Red, pink, rosy spicy intoxicated syrup in the veins of poetic words
Methodically all feel you through the nature warm to cool humidity
Nature changes its leaves with vibrant colors thru mask security
Which impresses the inner beauty as well as outer charm vivacity
22.10.2020 Chattogram