Long Belonging Poems
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You ask me how I'm doing
Your face clothed with surface sincerity;
You drill through me a sense of belonging
Making me feel like one of you,
A complete human being with functional systems;
With a sound mind and beating heart;
Flowing blood and standing skeleton,
Thick flesh beneath my black African skin;
You seem to care,your words coating your ego;
Your voice defending your true intentions
And your ears remain deaf to the truth within my answer;
Tradition has done me a disservice
That it would be rude not to respond to a greeting,
So, I give you what you want to hear;
"That I'm fine"
For that's all you'd stand to listen to with a fake smile;
While an answer off that grid would earn me a thin sorry,
Not like you're concerned or moved,
But in an attempt to save yourself from the burden,
Of lending me a helping hand when I'm drowning,
In these pits of the devil flaming with pain!
Why would I care enough
to open your recipe story?
Why don't I care enough
to pour you in to enrich mine?
I love your wild seasoned willingness,
can't say the same for our salty willfulness
to exchange our sweet belonging
for side-by-side sour longing.
for being karma's relentless instructions
when we could more peacefully
become simple incarnate
co-productions.
Prime cooking together
feeds my soul to yours,
organic compost
sublime breakfast
wild voiced beings
with choices
stir-flying nice.
Freedom from recipe's half-baked inwardness
evolves freedom toward half-fried out hypothesis.
Natural nutrients grow strong values
folding our stories with care.
A need for acceptance in each and everyone
To be part of something special in our lives
Feeling a sense of belonging when day is done
Look forward to greeting the world when morning arrives
Affiliation brings self-respect, an inner pride
Sometimes prejudice and bigotry reveal their fangs
There is no peace, no hope when you hurt inside
One more reason why sometimes our kids join gangs
We are one people, one race living on this earth
No one should feel unaccepted anywhere
Each human being should know their worth
Then hatred would no longer be the cross we bear
When we can understand what is right and wrong
When we have complete acceptance barring none
Then we can live the dream we've had for oh so long
Man can lay down his weapons, the battle done.
A threat of superiority
Leads to inferiority
Of a heart consumed
By a venomous poison
Of hate lead by jealousy
A darkness claim their soul
Convinced that an enemy
Was those loved by the sun
With skin oh so golden
Threatened by a culture
To which they steal like vultures
Begging to be chosen
Colonising a moment
Belonging to those with a darker skin colour
All we wanted was equality
All you wanted was authority
Lands built on lies
Where black met demise
Under grey and cloudy skies
And buried secrets forced to hide
Hidden under the cloak of defence used As your disguise
Blaming the victim of a crime you committed
Just to satisfy the deep pits of your stomach
A place where guilt resides
Melting in the acidity of your pride
Insecurities infect your eyes
Leaving you blind
Of your little white lies
To claim that being white
Correlated to being the superior race
To capitalise off of ignorant minds
Of an acceptance they yearned to find
Power a secret weapon
Abused by those who wield it
But the real truth is black lives
Are kryptonite to their ego
How their only achievement was culture stolen
How our presence engulfed them
How their need for attention to grow their ego
To distract them from a body so hollow
To stop from the voices that echo
Inferiority wrapped in sorrow
The smiles they keep a deceiving show
From a pain that refuses to go
When revenge is fueled by a crime not commited
One must question ones motivation
Ones intention with all this hatred
To a race that's only crime was being black
Punished With a lifetime of psychological torment
The fear of existing
Targeted by the envy of those whose livelihood was based on colonisation
And culture is based on controlled violence to achieve black silence
a sweaty mugginess
falls to the scent of showered skin
our voices that cede to song
sweet nectar clean, the heart of touch
touch, that lathers compassion in the
voltage of erotic energy
essence of belonging
discarding grime, the brittleness of worry
as steam rises, circular bursts,
that tap the glass with wet
streams to trail skin, imprecisely,
criss-crossed on pink flesh like laces of cloud-ribbons
our love side-steps the edge of drought
to scrub the core of understanding
anatomical knowing, seductive like pie
no hinges of grim jawed anger
our tireless exploration, currents of motion
time best spent in the curl of our folds
as we shower beneath the tarty chatter of water
boundless,
breezy
like a tonic surge of rain
Poem composed May 20, 2021 (Revised January 14/22)
Paper Sun
I could have dated someone.
Under the Paper Sun.
The damage is done.
You live far away past the horizon.
Your hair is black and your eyes are dark.
On the other side of the world, it is too far.
Your culture is humble.
If I woke up, I could have found you.
So many new places to see.
Pretty lights at night under the city.
A newway of life.
Watching the dragons fly.
Keep the fire burning between us.
Keep chasing after the Paper Sun.
You could appear one day.
Burning in flames.
Reaching out to hold me,
But dreams will fade.
This will sustain.
While I'm to blame.
I missed the calling.
Life is fragile with no belonging.
You faded into the mist.
With strong emotions carries on the music.
You reached out for my hand,
But you were never there. Only a memory in black
Inspired by Carrie Richard’s poem “Unlatched”
YOU ARE MY SONSHINE
Our song together,
just you and me
“You are my sunshine…”
Our song belongs,
only to us
And how I used to love
to pull you on my lap,
even catching
the last few times,
before you left
for college…
A son belongs
to his mom
for so short a time
Yet how wonderful
to see your success
in your job
with your wife
and kids
You are still my sunshine,
my only sunshine
a title belonging
to an only son
who used to call his mom
his princess
and heave his empty wallet
out of his pocket
“Get whatever you want, Mom”
Memories so strong
that hold open doors
for the one woman in his life
a lifetime ago
with a handsome bow
tied on a moonlight cradle
Now I cradle the phone to my ear
with bended heart
listening
to the grownup man...
Oh how proud I am.
11/16/2017
Friendships That End
Friends are the people
who find you in the middle of a storm,
with hurricanes raging all around you,
and even when all they have
is a single umbrella,
they hold it over you.
They become your shelter.
The place you can return to
when the world feels unbearably heavy.
The ones who make you hot chocolate
on your grayest days,
who sit beside you for hours
just to listen,
even while carrying
their own storms in silence.
They love you
for who you are,
not for what you can give them.
And I miss my friends.
I miss belonging
to a little world of my own.
A place where I could be myself
without thinking twice,
where they could be themselves
without ever feeling like
they were too much.
I miss the freedom
of walking out the door
and knowing someone would be there,
ready to come with me.
Even if all I had to offer
was my sadness.
Because somehow,
they always knew what to do with it.
They would sit beside me
through the grayest afternoons,
turning sorrow into laughter
without ever asking it to leave.
And maybe that’s what I miss most:
having people
I never had to ask to stay,
because somehow,
they simply did.
People who made me feel
that being alone
was a choice,
not a sentence.
Ecologically resilient health
and WinWin spiritual fueling economic development
and biologically transforming nature,
Combined with reflection
deflection
inflection of our personal
and economic
and political health v pathology experiences,
Recouple complex metaphors
of green commonsense
inviting a resilient ZeroZenZone case
for health benefits
of planting and harvesting basic humane-divine communion values.
Health allegories and gospel wealth parables
need not autonomously rely on sacred principles
equating blind faith with good faith.
Reassociating non-sectarian positive faith
with active sectarian research for healthy development
of significant positive and negative correlating trends,
appositions and oppositions,
invite regenerative climate healing
especially for remaining secular dominant skeptics,
anti-sectarian nihilists,
LoseSacred and LoseSecular paranoid sociopathologists,
conspiracy theorists,
God is an AngryWhiteWesternMan wounded children
and our fundamentally mistaken keepers,
zealous nature v spirit terrorists,
anti-theological bullies,
healthy climate haters, deniers, fear-mongerers,
self-righteous war marketers and managers and magnates and magnets
Dismissing lists of positive health values
like smiling
and kindness
as weak love tools
for marginalized tender trans- and pangenders
and cooperatively misguided souls
Longing for ecologically resilient health
and WinWin spiritual-economic development
and transformative belonging nature.
After we bade goodbye,
I couldn't love anyone anymore,
I've been faithful to you only...
hoping you'll change somehow for me;
belonging to you only in memory
doesn't make me feel lonely,
because I've discovered the truest love.
Luck is smiling on me today,
I've found the biggest star in the galaxy,
so afraid to conquer one hidden in the blue;
luck is smiling on me today...
am I not glad that all these blues
turned into the joys I lost and now are mine!
Oh, sadness is leaving even though it rains
and clouds hide the sunshine,
but not for long...because serenity
will return and won't go away!
After we hugged and cried,
we realized we could have stayed together;
trusting each other more, defeating fear,
and all the adversities we faced!
Luck is smiling in me today,
I'm stepping out of the ordinary,
telling myself I'm as worthy
like anybody else who was alone;
luck is smiling on me today,
there's none more precious than happiness!
My wide window is opening up to the new sunshine,
sadness and loneliness can't hurt me anymore;
it's time to feel happy and be me,
and my only wish is to have you all mine...
the choice is yours: walk away or stay?