Long Behinds Poems

There was an old lady, a frumpy old bag
who people called horrid, a witch and a hag
And 'though she was ugly and danced 'mid moonbeams
all was not quite as it might've then seemed

Old-fashioned black clothing...

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Once upon a time, mother was gifted new life.
Reformed, reborn the second child to poverty, 
through the coldness of a Maine winter came beauty.
A fair Eve to her brothers Adam construction
her bloom was destined for...

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Forty years are well enrolled, through diggjng dirt i say.'
In Bangladesh and nepal; Afganistan, Bombay.'
Many water wells there are' And yet' so filthy too.?
Its is spoken of upon t v always.' Yet is it really...

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The sound of the word
                Frightens me
The thought of it
          Drains...

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Barely Bear!

Today, barefooted I walked behind a bear.
Not behind just any old bear,
But behind a bear, whose behind was bare!!
And barely steps behind the bear - 
This is the bear with the bare behind,
Followed two...

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"The world's going to drowned!" he gasped as he sat up in his bed.
He glimpsed at his wife, suddenly imagining her dead.
"I must build a giant boat!" the thought came to mind. 
The flood was...

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There’s a thing called Corona that’s going around,
and the yakety-yak of it’s bringing folks down,
for it’s not like some circus that’s coming to town!
If you turn on your telly, you’ll probably hear
lots of news shows...

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JOURNAL OF THE DEPRESSED BITCH
CHAPTER 1 (I'll be over you)

How it really feels to be me.
On bad days which seem like everyday,
The blue pen slips between my fingers,
 rattles on the floor, off to bed...

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Lady Di 
The princess we loved

At 5ft 10 tall with stunning beauty
This angel stunned the world
With her duty.
A young Diana did marry a Prince Charles 
From other Royals she got snarls 
An independent woman, we...

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Grief
The sound of the word
Frightens me....
the thought of it....
Drains me....

Grief....
A thief of space
It visits you 
When you least expect
It entertains itself

Grief...
It steals the love 
That exists between
People....
Alas....
Why not warn 
Of your unwarranted arrival....

Grief...
It stikes fear...

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Burning rubber on the pavement used to be my one big thrill.
   Now with the price of gas just thinking about it gives me a chill.
Used to ten dollars worth of gas would...

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If I only had magic the amazing things I'd do

I would make you love me and I would love you too

If only I had magic
I could stop the war

I would perhaps wish Putin to be...

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They've tossed their souls away
again
harlots for a vote
they've fingered the race card
the rapist card
the Russian card
the Ukraine card
now they're playing mahjong 
with a virus.
Muzzling our freedoms and rights
placing plastic tiles in our minds
when this latest...

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These are the people that voted for our president
And these are the people that buy all the tabloids
And these are the people that wouldn’t notice talent
If it hit them over the head repeatedly

Last picked at...

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I am Married. He's a Prince. Stole my heart at sixteen.
We bought a house. Two dogs, three cats. 
We created two beautiful sons and the American dream.
I'm from nothing, he grew in stability. 
I work...

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let me tell you a little story about how i nearly lost my mind
it was in my early twenties i facing such confusing times
 back when i thought i was untouchable in a world so...

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Musty overalls
                                 ...

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Undocumented Warrior

By George W. Clever-----2002

I sneaked into this country on moccasin feet
No one knew I was here
Till one day someone asked 
Where is your C.D.I.B. card?			
Putting on my best stoic mask I said
Do I need...

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No more new year resolutions,
 no more lie on government restitution,
 no republic can survive its dilution
 no more pandemic blues,
 no more wild-eyed cons[iracy cues
 no more revenue that's due,
just a prayer for every...

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The Pollee

I guess now I have seen it all
A urinal for girls without the stall
General design? – a four prong unit
You back up girls and kind of spoon it
Don’t get the picture, here’s a teaser
It...

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This is based on the news out of fairfax, VA about a guy that is slashing ladiies behinds - there have been 4 or 5 reports so far.  Piquerism or picquerism (from the French...

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The Sports Fanatic

By Elton Camp

No matter what’s going on or about to occur,
Bubba leaves no doubt it’s sports he does prefer
His desire to “follow the action” led him to get
An extravagant fifty-five-inch LED television set

He...

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Do not Push It
I’m like horses do not like the wind today it is northerly and
the sun despite shining free of clouds cannot warm my chilled bones.
Horses turn their considerable behinds against the wind and...

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Rod Culleton, what can I say? But thank you mate
For all the ways, all the stands; the fireside talks
You challenge the falseness, you've walked the walk
You represent 'true Aussie creed' we'll make it right
Just as...

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I have in my possession an object I really prize.
It belonged to two guys whom I really idolize.
'Twas a necessary device when straight razors were the fad.
'Tis the leather razor strop used by my Grandpa...

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