Hairpiece Poems


angry citizen

Angry Citizens 

Tired of the sitting woke government, the fake
niceness and the depletion of Germanies 
heavy industry, not to forget her sycophantic
behavior towards Israel, a far-right party has
emerged.
There has been dark plotting afoot by some of
the party members, namely a famous TV cook
a welder from Austria, a GP. an astrologer
 and presumably a tealeaf reader
The plot was to kidnap the prime minister 
parade him on TV in his North Korean hairpiece
the one he only uses at home, hitherto a family
secret, although there had been rumors 
force feed him bratwurst, boiled potatoes 
and chicken nuggets until he promised to end 
his pathetic practices and make Germany
great again.
The would-be terrorists were caught there 
will be a trial, but we sense they will be let off
with custodian sentence 
"Only the heroic has the right to gloat.
Categories: hairpiece, abuse, addiction, anger, blessing,
Form: Blank verse

Premium MemberButt Hair - For Anne Lise

At Peter’s head I had to stare ...
His hairpiece was made of butt hair
It kept blowing off
I started to scoff
I’m gasping to get some fresh air!

Inspired by the picture posted by Anne-Lise for her poem 'Hair in the soup' and an old joke about butt hair blowing off

09/17/20
Categories: hairpiece, body, hair, wind,
Form: Limerick


Habemus Papam

Habemus Papam 

 A long, steep road- life time for some- and 
tired I paused outside a shop selling wigs
I didn´t go in, but its owner came out, handed
for a beautiful hairpiece for frosty weather.
I looked ten years younger, ambled with firm 
steps to the town´s plaza and seen by adoring
women, wore sunglasses to hide my celebrity.
    A gust of wind my wig flew off, landed on top 
of a street lamp its light came on even though 
it was in the middle of the day and austerity. 
A chorus of unseen singers sang: Baldy, baldy, 
baldy, my vanity vanished as morning mist.
“Why are you bald?” six year old girl asked.
“I was a seal suffering from hydrophobia and 
could not jump up in the air and look cute.”  
In a Chinese shop I bought a red hat, citizens
gaped at me with awe, and whispered is he our
new papa?
Categories: hairpiece, dedication, faith, , cute,
Form: Blank verse
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