Gastritis Poems


Premium MemberBlackhole

O dubious malicious horribilus
cunnigfilux goodfornothingfilux nillux;
go to hellishbellish boomboodydoomland.
Mean notsoclean bullfart smellitnot
go punking dunking blunking monkeying
jumpingjack bigfat*** fullofmethanegas
evilus spiritus devious mischievous
coronavirus getitis gastritis meningitis, 
run out helter skelter to wither thither
into a zypher cypher blither blackhole.

27.5.2020
Categories: gastritis, funny,
Form: Vogon Poetry

Premium MemberMs Black the Hypochondriac

I once worked with a youth who had gingivitis
Twenty years younger yet she already had arthritis

Pretty enough in spite of her dermatitis
She so craved attention we all thought caused by meningitis

Winters seemed worse with time off due to bronchitis
Bouts in hospital for appendicitis and diverticulitis

Regularly like clockwork she came down with severe vacationitis
After each self-prescribed vacation she’d strangely suffer from moneyitis

She talked our ears off we kept hoping she’d get laryngitis
But no, it was only bursitis and colitis followed by gastritis

Ms. Black sure was high maintenance with her neurosis and neuritis



AP: 1st place 2025, Honorable Mention 2020
Categories: gastritis, abuse, imagination, psychological, sick,
Form: Monorhyme


Pepto

Oh poor oh me oh
Franks and beans
Gives me indigestion
And you know what that means
Gastritis and heartburn
Needs pink relief
So I take 
Pepto-Bismol
Categories: gastritis, natureme,
Form: Ballad

Footle Gastritis

ill wind
have sinned
Categories: gastritis, funny
Form: Light Verse
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