Funny Dirty Poems | Examples
These Funny Dirty poems are examples of Dirty poems about Funny. These are the best examples of Dirty Funny poems written by international poets.
It's a dirty little business
And I've never stooped so low
But if I stay here long enough
I'll dig myself a hole
There's trouble all around
And death to be expected
But the tools that I have found
leave's a wound, that's undetected
It'll take time for all to see
What I've done here on this day
'bout the time that they take notice
I'll be far enough away
Now, I have them lying there
Soon, covered up with weeds
But if I want to grow tomatoes
I have to plant these seeds
Categories:
dirty, funny, garden, humor, humorous,
Florid banshees recoiled, neck and hankering sneer.
A succinctly exuberant suggestion when selective.
Came on, fell flat with laconic ornamentation.
A miniature jaunt, interment; glove comparted.
Pin-striped foxtails attuned tune maddening clairvoyants.
Precisely predisposed, wine-flavored latten tobaccos.
A wooden-tipped juxtaposition, stilling waisted.
Bygone midge nonguarded, slunk olive drabbing on bayou.
Thicken handkerchief lightly dabbing brow.
Darkness entrapment, fiat practice gymnastics.
Money management, coinage magnet, honored in mathematics.
Backflipping,
Backtracking,
Backpacking.
Super-Soaker moisture, quickie; quickly, socks on prickly.
Sloped incline, inside Mount Saint Helens' Slip 'n Slide.
Categories:
dirty, dedication, devotion, endurance, extended
I'm done
with all your
dirty rotten lies
thanks
for the loan
Categories:
dirty, fun, funny, humanity, humorous,
I once had a buddy named Bob
He was an unbearable slob
I pressed him a suit
And dressed him up cute
He dirtied it quickly, the knob.
Categories:
dirty, fashion, friend, friendship, funny,
I woke up this morning and promised to be good,
So I took a walk around my neighborhood,
I happen to meet a white whisky with a great chude,
But how we got into an argument cannot be understood.
I can remember sipping him from a distance..
yes, an old friend I would always need assistance..
We were both happy reminiscing our alliance..
Until he hits me on the floor when I had no balance..
I kept pleading in an uncommon language to my ally...
But he kept drawing me over bumps and made me see the world as a doodle..
Though I felt so good for the first time, cus I've never seen a black muddy rain dropped from the sky...
little did I know my legs where up to the heavens and my head pinned to a poodle..
I heard voices and laughter that I began to giggle as well...
with no knowledge of what will make voices laugh so loud as a bell..
But I know whisky is my man...
and with him I'll always be a dirty man..
Categories:
dirty, cheer up, desire, drink,
Hard blows traded in pitch-black night:
What do you expect? Funny fight?
The lips of the young devils tight!
All Blacks who’d seen films of Sir White,
In which men fought and forgot flight…
Speedy entry of teeth that bite:
From pain one of the Blacks turned white.
Still, exchange of blows at the site!
They had agreed “Till night says ‘Light,’”
Their eyes confirming a sky bright
And - just like that - gross shows of might;
No lip to take up “What is right…
Dirty words just hatched a night fight
Three lives: the chicks lost to The Kite…
Categories:
dirty, allusion, analogy, bullying, conflict,
I saw you were perfect..
and I loved your confidence..
but I yearned to feel whole,
So I made a fling...
You saw my ego,
You smiled at my strength,
you raised your brows and gave me a wink...
The night was blessed with cool breeze that gave rythms to cling..
I understood your manly display..
a bird with a grandest massive tail
though it seemed you had a golden star,
though it seemed you had all flowers dance to your guitar...
though it seemed you had fine jars and feathers to make the tallest tree har..
Yet you seek to explode me into your fireworks of cigar..
but I am a crane in jakar..
my immunity from duty is my priority...
I seek no ideal instance..
I seek for a dirty dove to sour in comfort of our reality...
My beauty lies on being unapologetic..
I am a black night crane with no reverence for psychic..
Categories:
dirty, desire, firework, freedom, funny
Somebody ought to go vacuum the moon
All the space dust is starting to show
Somebody ought to take care of it soon
For the wolves are all restless, you know
They say it’s too dingy to give a good howl
And we’re starting to get complaints from the owls
How is it that in the great “vacuum” of space
Someone still left dirty prints on its face?
Categories:
dirty, animal, funny, moon, space,
when I use dirty language and curse at Alexa
she reciprocates
by playing the darkest News of the day
Categories:
dirty, corruption, depression, emotions, funny,
Never stand behind a hippo!
Never stand behind a hippo!
Never stand behind a hippo!
Projectile diarrhea!
Categories:
dirty, animal, funny, hilarious, natural
There is a four letter word I use you see,
My wife says that "Ashamed" I should be.
I have said it so often I don't know how to end,
because of all the people I may offend.
But how do you break that habitual use,
when you've used it so much like a silly old goose?
Weekends are the worst time because that's when I say it most,
and the price I pay sometimes is not worth the cost.
My wife says to stop thinking those thoughts and it will go away,
but how can that be with that four letter word I say?
So I appeal to you my fellow Soupers for your advice,
if someone has the right idea it could make my life so nice.
I suppose you're wondering what it is I say,
that gets me into trouble along the way.
It's that four letter word that does not begin with a P, S, or a good old F...
I'm in trouble again, the dirty word is...GOLF !
Categories:
dirty, conflict, funny, golf, imagination,
I hate you so much
You smell like a dirty vag,
Day old fish and all
Categories:
dirty, funny, hate,
We're playing a gift exchange and playing it twice
Going to find out who’s naughty or nice”
Santa once could arbitrarily decide
Who to praise and who to deride
But tonight dirty dice gift grabs
Let see who will have the most dabs
We won’t be able tell at a glance
Choose well or consider the circumstance
Nothing is classified as right or wrong
There’s no need to sing an old xmas song
Once the naughty were as guilty as can be
Now they are merely victims of this xmas party
Dirty Dice is not fair
Just Roll them, they don’t care
It’s not about Naughty
It’s not about Nice
It’s just about rolling
the same number twice.
Where it gets crazy
is in the second half - then we see who gets dirty.
Listen and follow the rules
And see who ends up with all the jewels.
That were kept hidden for many years
A stocking full of coal no one need fear.
For this game will bring joy and cheers.
Let the game begin ---- and let not forget the beers.
Categories:
dirty, funny,
Dirty Minds
Your waiting to go on stage .
You get this funny feeling deep inside.
You pull your zipper open.
You take it out.
You play with it a second.
Ok forget the dirty minds.
You open the paper and read this poem.
Categories:
dirty, funny, hilarious, humorous,
So,
how is
it that my
wife can be so
good at Tetris and
so useless at stacking
everything in the dishwasher?
Categories:
dirty, funny, women,