Best Whelk Poems

You’re fake to the bone,
Hair, face, friendship;
Fake, fake, fake.

Walking around the school halls like top dog,
While we laugh as an extension falls out.
Pushing out that flat chest trying to emphasis.

Walking around swinging those hips so much, 
Girl, you should come with a hazard sign!
We wince...

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Nay, despite failing to make the grade,
     this bluesy well red, duff mute 
     average white band hit,
     hard knock school alumnus
jack of all trades master of none bumped along

   ...

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Donald Trump, Lemony Snicket ghost Spiro
Agnew, plus knowledgeable Jiminy Cricket,
all reliable, trustworthy sources, who
would never misinform gullible traveler
I know time to lather up 
with poetic shampoo

so don't you dare ballyhoo
moost likely known
to garden variety wahoo
(When You Wish Upon a Star goo
whee lyrics aside...), particularly
following feedback...

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There once was an elk a lonely elk
not a wapiti or moose
who had no friends not even a whelk
so he went in search the silly goose
hoping for the milk
of elkish kindness
with another of his ilk
tho' he did go looking high and low
roaming all around in...

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