Best Recovery From...Night Poems
You made a puerile and repugnant scene.
That was the night you broke a slot machine.
You did it in the casino right out in plain view.
There were scores of patrons around us to watch you.
You pestered me for money in a pertinacious way.
I kept saying to you, “No more money today.
You are having bad luck. This is not your night.”
Your ostensible behavior was enough to cause fright.
With your fist, you thoughtlessly broke the machine’s glass.
The men grabbed you immediately and hauled away your ass.
Furthermore, what happened next did not surprise me
The security guards treated you roughly.
In handcuffs across the floor, they took you away.
Upstairs in their office, you had to stay.
They had you in a dire predicament.
Casino security called the police department.
It was a wasted night with a comp I could not use.
For damages, I wound up paying your dues.
It seemed you realized what had occurred.
You were lucky not to be nailed with a criminal record.
Unfortunately, that did not stop your gambling.
Back to Atlantic City, you kept rambling.
Apparently, you have not learned your lesson to this day.
You thoughtlessly continue to throw your money away.
Sealed in white cotton
Bathed in SSRIs
My nights have forgotten dream.
Notebooks stand at the ready each morning,
Uselessly covered in dust.
Once I filled them remorselessly
With remains of the strange woman,
The snake-haired temptress,
The ashen guardians walking in shadows.
Now, I know only that memories
Fail me each dawn.
Each day, each night
I wait, anticipating irruption.
Each morning I wake to just routine,
just chores, just the next piece of reason.
Will the night play dead until I die?
Will the guests of my buried soul
Escape their early grave?
Am I condemned to an artless list?
No. No. And no again.
This blank page
Demands writing.
A rite of sacrifice must begin -
So from this death
Dream spring again.
For some crazy reason i can't sleep.
Every night i lay awake and think, it’s all I can do.
Tossing and turning while memories are burning.
Fears and darkness will haunt me.
I know once i close my blue eyes.
That is where the terror lye’s.
Dark images from the medications I took.
Knowing my body was controlled by disease.
Spending so many nights in that hospital room the colors started to blend.
Now I have finally started to mend.
Yet the scars won’t dissipate.
Trying to sleep I lay here every night hoping as I wait.
But each time sleep does greet me so do those haunting memories.
So for now I lie awake and count each breath I take.
The sun is shining, and the sky is clear.
I would not know it being stuck in here.
With no clocks or watches, I don’t know the time.
I’m too far away to hear the bells chime.
I have been sitting here all night at this table.
I’m light-headed from too much Black Label.
This is one night I would like to forget.
I have lost so much money on each placed bet.
Should I go and tap the money machine?
I don’t know, it’s an ambivalent scene.
For all of this, I gave up my night’s sleep.
It’s what I got for going in too deep.