Best Racy Poems

My thumbs ran off today.
I knew they were in love
And I suspected they might be compelled to be alone, together.
However….

It makes opening cans rather tough.
Turning the key in the ignition is nigh onto impossible.
I had trouble picking up my fork for my eggs.
But do they...

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There once was a couple so gay
Who liked to get down and to play
Their giggles so naughty
At thoughts that were smutty
Loved flaunting their conduct risqué



Submitted on December 27, 2018 for contest BAWDY LIMERICK sponsored by TANIA KITCHIN  -  RANKED 3RD...

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There once was a young man from Szechwan,
who thought his dick looked like a pecan.
He met a cutie named Butts,			
who was hankering for nuts,		
so he gave her his pecan to chew on.
...

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A monkey once sat
On a gentleman’s lap
And its antics were truly uproarious
The chain at its wrist
Jangled back to the fist
Of the fabulous Lady Notorious

“Excuse me, dear sir,”
She sweetly demurred,
“I see that my pet’s been inglorious.
I trust this mishap
Won’t land me in the lap
Of a quandary...

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