Best Quipped Poems

As Joe was biking down the side of the road
He ran across a chap with a dearth of driving skills.  
Or more accurately, the...

Read more of this work...

Ain't it wild the things that have passed?
The things we thought would change,
the things we thought weren't gonna last?

(remember picnics on the park grass?
that was...

Read more of this work...

The dear old pastor had occupied the same pulpit for years and years;
He preached fire, damnation and The Hereafter scorching his congregants ears!
He had baptized...

Read more of this work...

There once was a fellow from Bude
Who loved to play golf in the nude,
Someone quipped "that thing, 
Has a hell of swing,
He sure is one...

Read more of this work...

"The meek and the humble will be elevated to places where the haughty can never ascend even with a ladder. Stay humble in victory and...

Read more of this work...

Dad an’ I were tryin’ hard to land a pan o’ Redeye just outside o’ Huntsville 
off a dock on Mouzon Lake,
When I got all...

Read more of this work...

(* = i)


There’s a dimly lit house where a chicken sh*t mouse
Hides in a hole from the man and his spouse
He’s easy to please
Just leave...

Read more of this work...

My partner’s parents came to stay
They’re messing with my head
They only turned up yesterday
So we gave up our bed
But last night I’d been drinking
Until late...

Read more of this work...

Every morning, when I walk under my cherry trees,
There is soothing breeze which awakens my senses,
The flash back of life events roll before my eyes,
I...

Read more of this work...

Thence they come, these thoughts again
As I brood, on mind thus dimmed
Fraught with doubt, crossed by light
Naught but rout, mine sublime such night

Shall I muse...

Read more of this work...

It was many years ago now, before my wisdom teeth
had forced their way through my big mouth, they were still underneath.
I had an awesome job...

Read more of this work...

A preening promiscuous princess posed as "Penelope Prude."
With her poodle and parasol; well-perfumed, on Pine Street she stood.
A pompous pilfering pimp with a pink-painted poodle...

Read more of this work...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T-KFwPNkS6U 


Eddie was a braggart,
At least we thought as much.
His lower lip was loaded, 
A three finger dip of snuff…
My mind said, “I think not.”

And...

Read more of this work...

One dark dreary night while happily drinkin’ up a big big storm,
I beheld a tiny green man in my bottle, oh!—not the norm.

He’s my tiny...

Read more of this work...

Proctologists need to write when 
A prescription's called for big ben 
But a doctor equipped
With thermometer quipped
An as_hole's walked off with my pen...

Read more of this work...