Best Pasty Poems

So I sat downstairs
I tried to eat a pasty

She started screaming and shouting
Really getting quite nasty

Sat there for a minute, tried to let it go in
Now all I wanted to do was put the pasty in the bin

As she carried on giving the verbal abuse
It...

Continue reading...

People started running,
for buses, taxis, trains,
with umbrellas no defence,
against the wind and rain,
a drowned rat cycled past,
then disappeared down a lane,
when lightening flashed, I dashed,
hoping to dry out again.

I shot past the pub’s “welcome” sign,
“No Prams or Pushchairs Inside”,
then scrutinised the menu,
for something not micro’d...

Continue reading...