Best Like A Dog With A Bone Poems
Thats not my Elephant! it just followed me home.
I tried to shake it off, but shes like a dog with a bone.
So i made her feel welcome with balloons and confetti,
filled my pool for a bath and fed her spaghetti.
I even gave her a name and christened her Ella,
we became the best of friends and lived happily together.
Until one day a man from the council came round,
"your neighbours are complaining of an Elephant type sound."
"You can search high and low, theres no Elephant in my house."
He began in the basement, but all he found was a mouse.
He then prowled through the bedrooms,
even the cupboard under the stairs.
"Do you know how big Elephants are, you won`t find one there."
Then he walked through the garden, he`d never seen such a sight.
"Theres an Elephant in your shed, ill have to read you the bill of rights."
Then they took Ella away and she was dumped in the zoo,
where snotty nosed 2nd graders call her names and shout Boo!
That was my Elephant, but not anymore.
I still visit sometimes and we laugh like before.
You’re chock full of kingsize bull crap
Though female you are not a chap
A well-practiced liar
Whose pants are on fire
Your vitriol I’d love to zap
Just little things make you so ratty
You’ll spit venom, gee you’re darn catty
With a scowl and a frown
You will put good folk down
With hindsight I think you’re quite batty
Your language you need to remodel
I’m fed up of reading your twaddle
You can’t leave folk alone
Like a dog with a bone
Try using that brain in your noddle
May I offer a little advice
If you cannot say anything nice
Keep your mouth fully closed
Your bull crap’s been exposed
Go back to your fool’s paradise
King-Size Bull Crap Poetry Contest
Sponsored by Charles Messina
01/05/22
like a dog with a bone,
I
threw
the
first
stone
burning rage grew deep within
yelling and crying like
sin
explosive curses
-so uncool-
stomping and acting like a
damn fool
burning
==bridges==
with her
cool and calm like water…
was the scared face
of
my
daughter
running on
...
...
guilt
needing a swift
boot in the
rear
for
'Mother of the Year'
You had said you wanted me to try and explain just how I feel for you,
Well I guarantee you baby girl the feelings we share are mutual,
The love that I have for you is so very real,
So sit down for a moment and let me tell you just how I feel,
Their might be some other girls that happen to catch my eye,
I'm a man, yeah baby I looked that I can't deny,
But there will never be another girl that holds the key to my heart,
I gave it to you with that ring knowing nothing can tear us apart,
We might have some bumpy and rough patches along this long road,
But I promise to love you the way I do today past the days that we grow old,
I look for way more in a girl than just nice butt and beauty,
You've got the entire package love, Beauty, Brains and Loyalty,
Not having to worry about you cheating is a Blessin,
With lips, hair and make-up on fleek teaching all these other girls a lesson,
You'll never have to worry about me stepping out of line,
Ill be just like a dog with a bone protecting and loving what is mine,
If your ever thinking to yourself am I really enough,
Think back and remember this when times start to get rough,
Then maybe it'll help you see,
Your everything I'd want my wife to be,
Seeing as how I asked you to marry me,
No other girl could ever compare to you,
How is this for saying I love you,
The rat looked at me with pink eyes and said:
'Hey, it's me, can't you see? I'm not really dead!'
I was ready to shoo but then checked my stride,
it hadn't been that long ago since you died.
I shooed anyway and the rat scurried off,
of this reincarnation lark - I'd had enough,
once you're gone, you're gone, leave things alone,
instead of shaking, like a dog with a bone.
You were lucky you were here at all, maybe unlucky,
look what you had to endure - even meeting me;
I turned to go inside before any other apparitions appeared,
let's face it chaps, this life of ours was very weird.
Maybe when we get into the next 'plan,' we can get rid of:
intransigence, rogue dictators, death and the elephant god.
Mixed Emotions
Relaxation, serenity of being alone
Happiness, like a dog with a bone
Shoes off, soft grass on your feet
Dreams of the one you long to meet
Lay in the grass, look at the sky
Life is short, you begin to cry
Friends pass away, they leave too soon
You are now alone to stare at the moon
Grassy meadows, rolling clouds
Whispering willows that sing out loud
Warmth of the sun, soft gentle breeze
The day ends, you don’t want to leave
Liar liar
Pants on fire
That's what you all will say
Unless your pretty
Or cool and witty
Or have enough money to pay
Your on your own
Like a dog with a bone
Fighting an invisible beast
Followed by traitors
Who say there not haters
Like jesus at the last feast
Liar liar
Tongues on fire
That's what you all said
You don't even know me
One day you'll see
Why you don't wish people dead