Best Guff Poems


Premium Member Maybe the Guff Was Empty, Cancer Full Moon Eclipse

Maybe the guff was empty—Cancer full moon eclipse

Left field call on the black wall phone
faint cry from the distant end
spoke with throat lump of capital
disaster and a troddened womans most
everydom—lost before found—somehow Jan
knew and put forth a celestial no comment with 
I-hope-I-am-wrong-love gesture for the
love torn bull awaiting a cancerfold friend
offspring no spring-perhaps next spring. Anna
solid Anna so poised of classic stock sometimes
never bending to an antiflexible Taurus mood
was caught in a never place, the why of questions-
depleted character strikes. Will the blood
hordes rally for the fallen “fetalrade” and
heal the internal emohurt temperature 
inferno of unknown bliss. Does it ever come
at the right instant? Like where’s a cop when
you really need one—maybe 7-11 therapy would 
bring solace and peace. Forgive the forgiver
and pass your senses into another birth ability,
Keep your mind and your soul for the little 
lost egg. I don’t know or could never compromise 
no more of a complex juxtaposition of life
and death than that of biobeings so
closely connected that share the same
existence, one within-one yet
percent infinity bonded in a tidewater
liquid symbiosis that no manbeing in time
past or future will ever hope to match let alone
entertain. Be that as it may, you’ve felt the
sting of life and the creation of flesh for a brief
moment of time in time and all time is that holder of all
events we hope to achieve—your time in both
will come to be—you will share
and create from within, and not waiver
about the fallbacks we run down for
no explanations from anyone will suffice
or reason to make a whole sense of such
a fathomless inconsistency. I felt your
loss deep in my knees and thoughts flew
to your little soul upstairs. There are words
and there are no words—my deepest senses
to you and Dana—I know it will happen for you
as all things come to pass for those deserving                          dave collins

Griffs Guff

There once was a man named Griff Gruffen.
Who lived for his daily bran muffin.
When the bran ran out.
He started to pout.
Now poor Griff starts his day with nothin'.

Premium Member Enough of His Guff

Boss had had enough

  of the new employee's guff

    ~ gave him a time-out


Guff Macduff

An opera singer name Guff Macduff
When he sings he tries to stuff
All his tunes at one time
While drinking his red wine
Guff Macduff acted like a cream puff
© Daisy Ward  Create an image from this poem.

Premium Member She Takes No Guff

She breathes honesty into the bedroom
Dispelling liars and troublemakers
Flinging lechers into the fires of hell
She takes no guff

Sure at first some thought she would go easy
Targeting her at the bar
Sidling up, expecting her to fold
Someone to take home and fondle, possibly molest

She disarms them with her light green eyes
Her lilting laugh, her pretense at being inebriated
She gives them the little girl smile
So they will take her home.

When her eyes go amber and her face goes gray
She takes their lives, trying to conquer their souls
Some wail and scream
Others go quietly, knowing they deserve it

She gives no mercy
No hope
No relief
For at one time
When she was young
None was given to her.

Premium Member Mid-Week Side-Splitters, by Guff Awer

  
     This won’t hurt me at all; it’ll hurt you.
          The meek shall be buried in coffins of little worth

     Don’t put off ‘til tomorrow what you can put off forever
           Don’t call me. In fact, forget we even met.

      Crime may not pay, but at least it’s exciting
           Smoking is glamorous ~ so is dying

      Larry Bird in your hand is worth both of George Bush’s
            Rome wasn’t built in a day; neither was your bulging stomach.

      Talk is cheap, especially when it’s you talking.
             The rain in Spain is mainly a great big pain.

        It’s either the wolf at the door or the three little pigs.
              Worse than a worm in your apple is ½ a worm

        Laughter is the best medicine, unless you’re choking to death
               The sign said ‘No bikinis allowed,’ so I took yours off

        Always eat a big breakfast, so you can work your ass off the rest of the day
                Mares eat oats, and goats eat oats, but little lambs follow CDC guidelines *



         ___________________________________________________________________________________   
          * CDC  =  Center for Disease Control


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